Gotham Opera Singer Glad Dicks Who Walked Out Got What Was Coming
GOTHAM CITY — The lead singer of Wayne Opera House’s production of Mefistofele has gone on record saying the assholes…
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Naomi Krause — Page 6
66 stories found
Trans CSI Character Breaks Barriers by Being Both a Serial Killer and a Dead Sex Worker
LAS VEGAS — In a groundbreaking achievement for social progress, the transgender character on an upcoming episode of CSI: Vegas…
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Nintendo Confirms Link’s Last Name Is Also Mario
REDMOND, Wash. — Nintendo announced today that the iconic character Link, star of The Legend of Zelda, has the last…
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Pokémon Isn’t Shiny, Just Really Inbred
NEW BARK TOWN, Johto — A novice trainer mistook a horrifyingly deformed Pokémon for a rare, naturally occurring Shiny variant,…
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Every SNES Game You Don’t Own Now Worth Over $100
PEORIA, Ill. — Game industry analysts tracking the resale price of classic video games have noticed the remarkable coincidence that…
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Report: Local Wizard About to Do Some Major Orb Shit
MADISON, Wis. — Notorious local spellcaster Angwyn Abernant has been spotted fondling his crystal ball for five hours straight, with…
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Asshole D&D Player Can’t Make Session Because ‘Their Parents Died’
MIDDLETON, Wis. — Local dipshit and occasional tabletop gamer Christian Taylor has cancelled on his supposedly regular Dungeons and Dragons…
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Magneto’s Credit Cards All Fucked Up
GENOSHA — Brotherhood of Mutants leader Magneto has vowed revenge on humanity for designing credit cards that are destroyed by…
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Dad’s Insurance Only Covers Mad Catz Pacemaker
ARENA, Wis. — Local father Andrew Nikket has become the first ever recipient of a Mad Catz pacemaker this week,…
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Local Middle Schooler Releases 2020 Dad Tier List
MAZOMANIE, Wis. — James K. Polk Jr. high school student Nick Epson released his hotly anticipated dad tier list of…
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