May 5, 2022 Red Flag: Boyfriend Just Skipped Entire Cutscene Red Flag: Boyfriend Just Skipped Entire Cutscene BATAVIA, Ill. — In a potentially deal-breaking moment of their still-developing relationship, local girlfriend Liz Small reportedly noticed that her boyfriend Cyrus Andia skipped an…
January 27, 2022 River City Police Finally Take Down High Profile Girlfriend Kidnapping Ring River City Police Finally Take Down High Profile Girlfriend Kidnapping Ring RIVER CITY — Local police believe they have finally thwarted the crime ring that has seen dozens of local high school girlfriends get kidnapped over…
December 20, 2021 Girlfriend Maxes Out Bed’s Inventory Limit Girlfriend Maxes Out Bed’s Inventory Limit BEDFORD, Mass. — Local gamer Keith Dickey reportedly attempted to slot himself into his bed’s inventory only to find that his girlfriend, Sarah Young, had…
October 19, 2021 Guy Who Spent Years Getting Girlfriend Into Video Games Begging Her to Stop Playing Stardew Valley All Day Guy Who Spent Years Getting Girlfriend Into Video Games Begging Her to Stop Playing Stardew Valley All Day EL PASO, Texas — Local gamer Dexter Gilmore is reportedly begging his girlfriend Lilliana West to stop playing Stardew Valley all day after convincing her…
February 2, 2021 Steam Announces Oddly Specific ‘Games You and Molly Used to Play Before You Broke Up’ Sale Steam Announces Oddly Specific ‘Games You and Molly Used to Play Before You Broke Up’ Sale BELLEVUE, Wash. — Online video game retailer Steam has announced an eerily particular sale, seemingly curated exclusively around games you used to play with Molly…
November 25, 2020 Guide: How to Trick Your Boyfriend Into Thinking He’s Letting You Win Guide: How to Trick Your Boyfriend Into Thinking He’s Letting You Win Ever wanted to annihilate your boyfriend in video games without annihilating his fragile male ego? Well with these six simple tips, you’ll be racking up…
November 22, 2020 Man Worried He’ll Never Find Open World Game as Good as Her Man Worried He’ll Never Find Open World Game as Good as Her ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local gamer Joe Fleming is reportedly worried that Nintendo’s stunning masterpiece Breath of the Wild has ruined any chance that he’ll ever…
June 17, 2020 Girlfriend Really Dragging Her Feet in Co-Op Game She’s Being Forced to Play Girlfriend Really Dragging Her Feet in Co-Op Game She’s Being Forced to Play BROCKTON, Mass. — Noting the fact that she keeps falling behind to the edge of the screen and dying repeatedly, local gamer Tyler Benson says that…
May 25, 2020 Boyfriend Apologizes for Load Time Boyfriend Apologizes for Load Time SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Recent sexual partner Nathan Stenhouse has released an apology for his unacceptably short load time during last night’s love making session with…
