Alex Ptak
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GREEN HILL ZONE — Sonic the Hedgehog came out against misinformation about his body by announcing publicly for the first…
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CHAO GARDEN — Police have confirmed that the death of 2-hour-old Chao “Happy” came at the hands of local loan…
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Walker MacDonald
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SANTA MIRA, Calif. — Alternative medicine enthusiast and lifelong Sonic fan Kim Hammond recently purchased a collection of chaos emeralds,…
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Ben Friedman
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Hey pal, are you busy? I thought we could just talk. You know, man to man. Son, I think you’re…
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Kyle Erf
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TOKYO — In a stunning press conference this morning, SEGA has finally validated the long-held fan theory that Sonic the…
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Mark Roebuck
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LAS VEGAS — Tragedy struck at the Bellagio Hotel & Casino today, as the squished and dismembered carcass of beloved…
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Kevin Flynn
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Fans of Sega’s iconic blue hedgehog have been wondering for years why the company has stopped distributing 1994’s Sonic the…
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Joe Tilleli
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WYNNEWOOD, Okla. — Local Big the Cat owner and G.W. Zoo founder, Joe Exotic, insists that there is absolutely nothing…
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Owen Crowlie
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Thousands of gamers across the world are providing testimonials accusing Sonic The Hedgehog water levels of giving them lifelong anxiety…
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Kevin Flynn
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STATION SQUARE — In a somber twist to an otherwise routine checkup, a doctor on call at Station Square Medical…
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