Legendary Chiptune Composer Cites Crippling Tinnitus as Inspiration

Posted on June 25, 2024 by Kyle Duggan

FORT WAYNE, Ind. — Renowned chiptune composer Joel Grady revealed that all of his award winning soundtracks were directly inspired by his debilitating tinnitus, which causes him to hear a constant, high-pitched ringing in his ears.

“I don’t know how much longer I can live like this,” said Grady. “I never wanted to make music. I wasn’t a gamer growing up. Hell, I didn’t even know ‘chiptune’ was a thing until I turned thirty and the ringing started. I was complaining about it to my buddy who happened to be working on an indie game, and he said the unbearable sounds I was hearing were exactly what they were looking for. I honestly don’t know why anyone would choose to listen to this. I’ve got a stable job now, I guess, but I’d rather have peace.”

Grady’s wife, Melissa, said that his condition and resultant career were ruining their relationship.

“He’s just not the man I married anymore,” said Melissa. “We used to talk and laugh all day. Now he can barely hold a conversation. Not only can he not hear what I’m saying, but half the time, ‘inspiration’ will strike him halfway through a sentence. He’ll just run off to write a new song. I felt bad for him when the tinnitus started, because he couldn’t get a good night’s sleep. Now it affects both of us, because he wakes me up when he springs out of bed in the middle of the night to compose. It doesn’t help that he is audibly crying through all of this.”

Birdfeeder, an indie studio that specializes in roguelikes and 2D platformers, related a meeting they had with the renowned composer.

“We almost landed him for a project we’re working on,” said Neil McMillan, a lead developer at Birdfeeder. “He actually met with us at our office, which seemed really cool at the time. We couldn’t believe that we had a shot at hiring him, but it fell apart pretty quickly. Once we told him that the game’s protagonist was a regular guy who falls under a terrible curse that is also the source of his powers, he just started to weep uncontrollably. We happened to have a mic in the room and got some decent samples out of that, but he didn’t stick around and won’t return our calls anymore. It’s such a shame.”

At press time, Grady was reportedly speaking at a gaming convention, begging his fans to explain how they found his music appealing.

Deadpool Breaks Fourth Wall To Give Full Mint Mobile Commercial

Posted on June 25, 2024 by Charles Bill

LOS ANGELES — A preview screening for the upcoming film “Deadpool & Wolverine” featured a fourth wall-shattering moment where the title character turned directly to the camera and presented a thirty second Mint Mobile commercial, sources confirm.

“Alright popcorn munchers, listen up,” said the Merc with a Mouth, who was joined by both Wolverine and a green cartoon fox. “Sure, Thunder From Down Under over there has a Nokia flip phone because he’s from the 1800s and Canadian, but you and I are normal. We have the best, most modern phones and we don’t want to pay for huge contracts. When I was on AT&T, I could barely afford my daily chimichanga. But with Mint Mobile, you can get unlimited data for only $15 a month. That’s almost like the unlimited power that wrinkly-chinned Grimace got when he had those power stones. Speaking of power stones, I have a couple in my pants right now. Scan the QR code on the screen while I make a smoothie.”

Although the ad is expected to bring millions of dollars in business to Mint, not all participants in the film were thrilled with the scene’s blatant consumerism.

“Listen bub, movies are about having fun and eating Twizzlers, not whatever this is,” said an exhausted fifty-five year old Wolverine as the scene continued. “When I had my emotional sendoff in Logan, which I’m now undercutting by being in this movie, I didn’t turn to camera to promote the tourism board of Australia. Trust me, I wanted to, they offered me a lot of money, and the koalas are something special. I joined up with Wade to kick some ass and cut people in half, and all he can talk about is this cell phone carrier and something called Aviation Gin. I don’t know what those things are, but he keeps making snide remarks about them like it’s an inside joke. I’m going back to musicals after this.”

Despite the controversy, experts say this kind of guerrilla marketing is not unprecedented in cinema.

“Celebrities use their films to hock products all the time,” said film critic Leonard Maltin. “George Clooney only made Ocean’s 11-13 because he knew he could portray Danny Ocean as a massive fan of Nespresso. Rihanna appeared in Battleship as a character desperate for low-cost, high-quality lingerie, and her climactic moment comes when she discovers Fenty Beauty. David Fincher had to cut a scene in Se7en in which Gwyneth Paltrow’s disembodied head espouses the health benefits of her Goop vagina candles. And it’s a worse film for it.”

At press time, sneak peek attendees described a scene where Deadpool fights hordes of mutants while promoting “Welcome to Wrexham” on FX.

Soulmask Update Patch Notes June 25

Posted on June 25, 2024 by Michelle Pereira

UPDATED June 25

Soulmask Early Access Hotfix 07 June 25

Dear Chieftains,

To provide a better gaming experience, the server will undergo maintenance. It will be temporarily unavailable starting from June 25, at 7:00 AM UTC, with an expected downtime of 30 minutes. This update includes a client update, and chieftains will need to update their client to enjoy the game normally. We are very grateful for your understanding and support.

The update details are as follows:

[Game Optimizations]

Optimized the visual and sound effects of the Claw Tribe Leader·Bloodletter's Ignite Weapon ability.

Optimized the sound effects for certain Dual-blade Mastery.

Enhanced the ambient sounds in the Rainforest and Desert areas.

Added Superarmor and extended Invincibility frames to the Blade Golden Mastery "Low Strike", making it easier to hit smaller targets.

Tribesmen within a 100-meter radius of a Bonfire will not be attacked by the Tribute Capturer NPC.

Improved the lighting effects of Wall Torches and Wall Oil Lamps.

Map now displays icons for free-range animals that are not mounts.

Optimized simultaneous operations of multiple granaries, with tribesmen now coordinating to tend to their respective farmlands.

You can now roast mushrooms and potatoes using recipes directly on your cooking stove.

Optimized the attack pattern of the Armadillo Lizard.

[Gameplay Adjustments]

Removed the sound coefficient correction from defense mods and deleted Chill-proof and Heat-proof adjustments in damage reduction mods.

Silica Sand can now be produced in a mill.

Fish Soup is now automatically consumable by tribesmen.

Turtle Shell can be used as a substitute for Shell to repair Bronze and Iron costumes.

Optimized combat AI for low-level (below level 40) humanoid enemies, who will now prefer to Block rather than Dodge when attacked from a distance.

Reduced the skill cooldown time for the Great Sword Mastery "Uplift."

Respawn function is disabled while riding.

[Bug Fixes]

Fixed the issue where the "Extreme Cold Aura" effect would remain after the character's death.

Fixed the issue with the Talent entry "Calm and Peaceful" displaying incorrect stack numbers.

Fixed the issue where the Gauntlets Mastery "Slidestep Hook" could cause characters to be thrown too far.

Fixed the issue allowing multiple stacks of the Mastery "Guarding Roar" and "Fearless Roar" to be applied.

Fixed the issue where visual effects caused by the Vajra Ape could persist.

Fixed the issue where rolling under the Blood Sacrifice state was misidentified as a Low Strike.

Fixed the issue where interrupting the recovery of "Retreat Drill" with a jump would also briefly apply Superarmor to other skill hits.

Fixed the issue where hitting an enemy's shield (wooden or steel) when they are not in defense state does not cause damage.

Fixed the sliding issue occurring after a spear execution.

Mining, Logging, and Collecting now produce a certain amount of noise, alerting the enemy.

Fixed a small chance overlap issue between Mimicry models and Masks.

Fixed the issue where certain Mimicry models block the player's view when drawing a bow.

Fixed the issue where Llamas carrying NPCs can be damaged by traps.

Fixed the issue where the Superarmor remains when the "Tactical Guidance" Mimicry of deployed tribesmen is disabled.

Fixed the issue where NPCs carried on the player character's back would behave abnormally if grabbed and dropped by a Vulture.

Fixed the issue where the release of certain skills would cause mining.

Fixed the issue where Parrots and Monkeys placed on shoulders would disappear if the game client was forcibly closed.

Fixed the issue where Half-Height Blackstone Stairs can be constructed in mid-air.

Fixed the issue where the displayed range of Workshop type buildings does not change after modifying their coverage area.

Fixed the issue where tribesmen assigned to maintain bonfires would not actively supply fuel to the Air Heater.

Fixed the issue where all tribesmen might show the "Cannot assign work to the default tribesman" prompt.

Soulmask Early Access Hotfix 06 June 21

Dear Chieftains,

Thank you for your consistant support of Soulmask! We will undergo maintenance. It will be temporarily unavailable starting from June 21, at 7:00 AM UTC, with an expected downtime of 30 minutes.

The maintenance details are as follows:

Fixed the occasional issue where the mount stamina can't recover after cross-server travel

In this update, we will enable the cross-server feature for the PVP servers that were released in the first week of Soulmask Early Access (before June 7, at 7:00 AM UTC) . Players on these servers can teleport to other servers in the same region or same war zone via the portal above Pyramid. More PVP cross-server features are on the way! We will enable the cross-server features for the remaining PVP servers in sebatches according to their releasing times.

Hope you have an enjoyable time in the world of Soulmask!

The list of servers with the cross-server feature enabled is as follows:

```
AS[Group02_1]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group02_2]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group02_3]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group02_4]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group02_5]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group02_6]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group02_7]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group02_8]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group03_1]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC09~17
```
```
AS[Group03_2]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC09~17
```
```
AS[Group03_3]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC09~17
```
```
AS[Group03_4]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC09~17
```
```
AS[Group03_5]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC09~17
```
```
AS[Group03_6]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC09~17
```
```
AS[Group03_7]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC09~17
```
```
AS[Group03_8]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC09~17
```
```
AS[Group04_1]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group04_2]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group04_3]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group04_4]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group04_5]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group04_6]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group04_7]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group04_8]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group05_1]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group05_2]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group05_3]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group05_4]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group05_5]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group05_6]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group05_7]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group05_8]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group06_1]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group06_2]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group06_3]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group06_4]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group06_5]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group06_6]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group06_7]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
AS[Group06_8]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC12~16
```
```
NA[Group02_1]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group02_2]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group02_3]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group02_4]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group02_5]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group02_6]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group02_7]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group02_8]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group03_1]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group03_2]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group03_3]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group03_4]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group03_5]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group03_6]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group03_7]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group03_8]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group04_1]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group04_2]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group04_3]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group04_4]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group04_5]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group04_6]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group04_7]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group04_8]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group05_1]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group05_2]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group05_3]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group05_4]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group05_5]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group05_6]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group05_7]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group05_8]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group06_1]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group06_2]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group06_3]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group06_4]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group06_5]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group06_6]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group06_7]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group06_8]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group07_1]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group07_2]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group07_3]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group07_4]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group07_5]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group07_6]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group07_7]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group07_8]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC22~06
```
```
NA[Group08_1]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group08_2]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group08_3]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group08_4]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group08_5]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group08_6]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group08_7]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
NA[Group08_8]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC01~05
```
```
EU[Group02_1]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group02_2]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group02_3]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group02_4]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group02_5]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group02_6]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group02_7]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group02_8]PvPtest_6P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group03_1]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group03_2]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group03_3]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group03_4]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group03_5]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group03_6]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group03_7]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group03_8]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group04_1]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group04_2]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group04_3]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group04_4]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group04_5]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group04_6]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group04_7]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group04_8]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group05_1]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group05_2]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group05_3]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group05_4]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group05_5]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group05_6]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group05_7]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group05_8]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group06_1]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group06_2]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group06_3]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group06_4]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group06_5]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group06_6]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group06_7]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group06_8]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group07_1]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group07_2]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group07_3]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group07_4]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group07_5]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group07_6]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group07_7]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group07_8]PvPtest_06P Tribe_UTC19~23
```
```
EU[Group08_1]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group08_2]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group08_3]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group08_4]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group08_5]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group08_6]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group08_7]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```
```
EU[Group08_8]PvPtest_20P Tribe_UTC16~24
```

Soulmask Early Access Hotfix 05 June 20

Dear Chieftains,

To provide a better gaming experience, the server will undergo maintenance. It will be temporarily unavailable starting from June 20, at 7:00 AM UTC, with an expected downtime of 30 minutes. This update includes a client update, and chieftains will need to update their client to enjoy the game normally. We are very grateful for your understanding and support.

The update details are as follows:

[Map Optimizations]

Optimized the level structure of Random Maze Ruins

Optimized the triggering of the one-way door in dungeons to prevent players from getting stuck in the door

Optimized the dungeon's teleportations and its random range to prevent some anomalies

Added new Respawn Points in the advanced area that can be used upon exploration

[Experience Optimizations]

For tribesmen: enhanced their survival capabilities regardless of the deployed states. Upon Feign Death, auto-recover of deployed tribesmen will be much faster

The disease's duration has changed from Permanent to 300 seconds. VFX displays when catching a disease. Antidotes' Intros are added to the disease buff description

```
Optimized bear's combat skills and AI
```

While playing the cutscene — the death of “Central Core”, players obtain a Damage Immunity effect

The random chance for some of the Non-Golden Masteries has increased

Invulnerability has been added while repairing nodes in Pyramid to prevent interruption

Attack Speed is now displayed on the stats interface

Optimized bow's mastery "Shooting Technique". The target is easier to hit when locked on

Optimized VFX for the damage reflection of the talent affix "Fight Back"

Granary and Breeding Farm are now unlocked at Lv.10

Damage derement by Sticky Explosive Can to different constructions becomes smoother

Steel Battering Ram and Steel Cannonball deal more damage to Blackstone Constructions

Corrected action and sound effect of drinking from Water Bottle

Added description for Repair Times and Loss Ratio of Max Durability to gear tips

[PVP Cross-server Test is On]

After this update, the cross-server feature of PVP servers in Group01 on Asia Server, North America Server, and Europe Server will unlock at 07:00, 6/20 (UTC). Players on these servers can travel to other servers in Group01 of the same region via the cross-server portal above the pyramid. Other PVP cross-server features are on the way.

[Bug Fixes]

Fixed the special effect remnant issue of Common Mammoth's skills

Fixed the display errors of Quality, Level, and other info under details in Hunting Gallery

Fixed the issue where Tempest Griffin's Wind Projectile wouldn't disappear after being unlashed

Fixed the issue of invisible friend units that couldn't be seen when Rendering Quality under Game Settings - Graphics is set as Low or Ultra-low

Fixed the issue where the display of “Mysterious Stone Table” wasn't refreshed after switching masks with mask hidden

Fixed the mask decor display issue on tribesmen after remodel

Fixed the display anomaly of Upper Limit for Tribesmen on the I interface after the adjustment of Recruitable Tribesmen Coefficient

Fixed the issue of occasional anomaly skin color after the hairstyle was changed

Fix the issue where when the bow was drawn, some feather accessories and Mimicry models would block the view

Fixed the issue where characters could stand on Anti-climb Thorns

```
Fixed Piranha's growth speed issue
```

Fixed the teleportation drift issue of animals after being carried through Portal

Fixed the issue where the NPC's action of using bandages still went on after being interrupted

Fixed the issue where the talent affix “Multiple Shooting” could only take effect in the Solo mode

Optimized the clipping issue of Vajra Ape's animation and its attack sound effect

Fixed the model inconsistency of throwable weapons when gripped and not gripped

Fixed the issue where “Mind-Heart Unison”, “Bloodbath Recovery”, and some other talent affixes couldn't be triggered when facing animals or machines

Fixed the issue where barbarians with the “Likes defecation” affix could trigger the continuous effect when entering Outhouse, but the effect would be removed the instant they left Outhouse

Fixed the issue where barbarians with the “Likes dancing” affix could trigger the continuous effect when dancing, but the effect would be removed the instant they stopped dancing

Fixed the action play anomaly of the executed when a barbarian was executed with Backstab

Fixed the issue where players might get stuck in models after being caught and thrown by the boss's Grab skill

Fixed the absence of the footstep's sound effect when riding an ostrich

Fixed the inconsistency between the displayed number and actual number of Turkeys in Turkey Coop

Fixed the issue where "Lighting Module" would reactivate when getting on and off the mount.

Fixed the vibration issue of Sprint while auto-advancing

Optimized the issue where player gets stuck in the air with the Leap Slash skill

Fixed the issue where after the tribesmen on patrol were deployed, the patrol mode was still on

Fixed the occasional display error of buff's time

Fixed the occasional issue where the skill gets stuck or first dry shoot would be released when using the bow’s mastery “Running Fire”

Fixed the occasional animation issue of character execution

Fixed the issue where players could enter the interior of mountains by climbing

Optimized the monster quantity in the dungeon ruins

Soulmask Early Access Hotfix 04 June 17

Dear Chieftains,

To provide a better gaming experience, the server will undergo maintenance. It will be temporarily unavailable starting from June 18, at 7:00 AM UTC, with an expected downtime of 30 minutes. This update includes a client update, and chieftains will need to update their client to enjoy the game normally. We are very grateful for your understanding and support.

The update details are as follows:

Adjusted the strength of the invading leader monsters. These leaders aren't that hard to deal with now when invading the tribe guarded by many players

Fixed the issue that the boss may disappear in Official and Private Servers

Fixed the error that occurred in dissecting vultures with Steel and Enhanced Butcher's Knives

Fixed the occasional disconnection when shooting with Rapid Bow's Divine Power Possession switched on

Fixed the issue that players failed to exit the Building Mode after the construction item was discarded

Fixed the issue that the ostrich nest wouldn't refresh anymore if the ostrich egg in your hands was broken

Fixed the issue that Refined Feed couldn't be crafted caused by recipe reminder that fuels were needed

Fixed the occasional crashing issue of the server

Of course, we won't stop here! This week, there will be another update for Soulmask, with more adjustments and improvements. Stay tuned!

Soulmask Early Access Hotfix 03 June 14

Dear Chieftains,

To provide a better gaming experience, the server will undergo maintenance. It will be temporarily unavailable starting from June 14, at 7:00 AM UTC, with an expected downtime of 30 minutes. This update includes a client update, and chieftains will need to update their client to enjoy the game normally. We are very grateful for your understanding and support.

The update details are as follows:

[Major Balance Adjustments]

Adjusted the difficulty of monsters in the Volcano and Snow Mountain areas, as well as the difficulty of the five major Bosses in the Pyramid on doom difficulty. Improved the overall difficulty progression in the game.

Increased the Drop Multiplier for the five major Bosses and elite animals in multiplayer battles.

Reduced the aggro transfer from Plunderers and Outcasts towards players.

Increased the level bonus for kill EXP, with higher-level creatures and barbarians granting more EXP.

Increased starter character's basic Stamina Recovery speed by 100%.

Reduced Stamina Recovery wait time from 1s to 0.5s.

Increased the output speed of Honey and Bee Wax in Beehives.

Beehive output is now influenced by the Automated Production Base's Output Multiplier.

[Gameplay and Function Adjustments]

Mounts come in different qualities, featuring different speeds.

In Solo/Private Server Mode, Jaguar/Snow Leopard Cubs support quality coefficient adjustment.

The Mimicry ability of the initial Civilization/Conquest/Rich masks is changed to become usable after the node is repaired.

The adjustment of HP, ATK, and DEF coefficients of creatures in Solo/Private Server mode will be released.

The requirement for Iron Wire in the Craftsman's Bench upgrade is removed.

Sharp Fangs can be used to replace Horns in repairing Bronze Shoes.

Removed the setting that the character will die instantly instead of entering the near-death status upon taking deadly damage in the head.

Invaders of the player's base will no longer use Grease Tanks.

Adjusted the refresh rule of the Holy Relic Chest. It will now refresh normally even if there are offline players in the room.

The hatred passing distance of Plunderers in Rainforest Ruins is reduced.

In multi-player battles, increase the drop multiplier for the five bosses and elite animals.

Added corresponding specimens for Pyramid Boss at different difficulty levels.

[Experience Optimization]

Keep Advancing function (the = key by default) will now turn into Dash automatically

Rainy weather can now wash off feces and the ignition effect.

Optimized the combat AI of deployed tribesmen. When the Master attacks a target, the deployed tribesmen in Assist mode will also attack the target instead of just standing around. Reduced the probability of pacing during combat, making deployed tribesmen more proactive in attacking.

Added a new button in the character interface to close the character preview and increase performance

Added battle background music for Snow Mountain Plunderer Leader.

Fixed the issue where attempting to perform a jump slash attack could trigger a basic attack instead.

Increased the windup time and shortened the hitstop time for the Anaconda's Wrap skill.

Increased the cooldown time (CD) for Anaconda's Wrap skill to 8 seconds

Enhanced the sound effect for successfully reflecting attacks.

Added a recovery action that can interrupt rolling.

Reduced the attack frequency of feline creatures when performing follow-up attacks from behind, and these attacks now include an effect that dismounts targets

Added a button to revert the queue to the planned queue in the loop queue settings interface.

Adjusted the disease mechanic to ensure that characters cannot contract the same illness more than once.

Increased the collection output of monkeys.

Six types of storage boxes now support stacking and no longer occupy individual slots in the player's inventory.

Dropped items now merge only into the previous owner's drop bag.

Optimized crowding issues among tribesmen. Added a prompt when navigation to the workbench is obstructed.

Optimized the spawn positions and disengagement distances for large camp Ruins Bosses.

Random invasion monsters no longer spawn near Constructions.

Fishing trap adjustments have been made to construction space, capture efficiency, and the number of catches to encourage proper use and prevent the impact on the game environment and server performance due to the excessive use of traps.

[Mask Adjustments: Tactical Guidance]

Reconnaissance now increases deployed tribesmen’s HP by an additional 100%.

Full-out Attack now increases deployed tribesmen's ATK by an additional 50%.

Positional Defense now increases deployed tribesmen's DEF by an additional 50%.

Emergency Mobilization now triggers at 5% damage taken instead of 10%, and the recovery effect has been adjusted to restore 50% of the damage taken, rather than 5% of Max HP.

[Mask Adjustments: Natural Enlightenment]

Nature's Blessing now increases Resilience by 10 instead of 5.

Increased the duration of animals summoned by Nature's Heart from 300 seconds to 600 seconds.

Expanded the types of animals summonable by Nature's Heart to include animals in the Ruins.

[Regarding Bugs]

Fix the issue where the Boss has a chance to disappear in Solo/Friends mode.

Optimized the drop logic for Death Packages to ensure they appear at the player's feet after resurrection, preventing them from falling through the ground.

Fixed the issue where players could get stuck in walls when teleporting out of the Dungeon.

Fixed the issue where the C key could still trigger Mimicry after the Mimicry key was changed.

Fixed the issue where the initial character could still be remodeled when there were no parts on the Mysterious Stone Table.

Fixed the display anomaly of feather ornaments in certain cases

Fixed the issue where the Mysterious Stone Table could be moved during remodeling.

Fixed the formula error for the Medium Costumes and Gloves of the Flint Tribe.

Fixed the issue where the Arrow Trap's knockback effect would only push the target backwards.

Fixed the issue where Peg Board deals no damage if placed on walls

Fixed the crafting speed anomaly of the Workbench due to the stacking power of the Power Windmill.

Fixed the issue that the talent effect “Mind-Heart Unison” can be triggered by deterred barbarians

Fixed the issue that no barbarians in the game own the title “Archery Master”

Changed the wrong translation “Likes braised meat” to “Likes sauced meat”

Fixed the incorrect configuration of the Vulture’s skill damage type.

Fixed the incorrect gear qualities and stats in Set Crafting.

Fixed the issue with the Construction Hammer's Durability not affected by the Durability Cost Multiplier.

Fixed the issue with the workbench destruction sound effect not playing correctly.

Fixed the issue with Crossbow Tower attacking deterred barbarians carried by Llama.

Fixed the issue where Spears are prematurely launched when squatting down.

Thank you very much for your support and understanding. More optimizations and updates are on the way.

Join discord: https://discord.com/invite/4G2K7FDbtp

Soulmask Early Access Hotfix 02 June 7

Dear Chieftains,

To provide a better gaming experience, the server will undergo maintenance. It will be temporarily unavailable starting from June 7, at 8:00 AM UTC, with an expected downtime of 30 minutes. This update includes a client update, and chieftains will need to update their client to enjoy the game normally. We are very grateful for your understanding and support.

The update details are as follows:

[Major Updates]

The Perfect Remodel Switch will unlock in Solo mode/Friends mode/Private Server. After their data is recorded at the Mysterious Stone Table, the tribesmen can be remodeled and revived upon death, retaining their Level, Proficiency, and Talent Affixes from before death. The latest recorded tribesman data will be used when reviving a tribesman.

In Solo mode/Friends mode/Private Server, you can adjust the Tribesmen Cap that can be recorded via Info Entry Coefficient.

No parts are needed to record Tribesmen Info at Mysterious Stone Table (Remodeling Tribesmen still needs equipping parts)

Adjust the recruitment rules for tribesmen: when a tribe has more than 10 players, the total number of recruitable tribesmen increases by 1 for each additional player.

[Experience Optimizations]

Support for a new "Timed Enemy Respawn Switch" in Solo/LAN/Private Server modes: When this switch is turned off, enemies will not respawn while there are players in the Barrack. The switch is off by default.

Now, the camp will notify players before barbarians respawn.

The 5 main bosses have different appearances depending on the difficulty level.

Further optimized the cast backswing interruption

When holding a blade or a torch, players can attack while looking up or down.

The exclusive talent "Steel Body" for Flint has been adjusted to be obtainable by combat professions of the Claw, Flint, and Fang tribes. The general talent "Firm Will" has been adjusted to be exclusive to the Flint tribe.

Now, when tribesmen take items, they will also take them from beehives and dismantling stations.

No need to tick "Set the queue as Circulating Queue". It’ll auto-toggle Circulating Queue when you click Confirm

```
Pen will show the animal's quantity
```

Ballista won't attack the animal caught by traps

Work Broadcast will only be sent to Tribe Channel at the start and end. At other times, it'll only show above the head

Patrolling tribesmen will no longer attack animals caught in traps.

Player-owned monkeys will no longer die of thirst or hunger; they will take care of themselves.

The types and quantities of feathers required to unlock certain feather decorations have been adjusted, making them easier to unlock now

[Difficulty Adjustments]

"Casual" and "Easy" difficulty damage coefficients have been adjusted. (Existing players with saved files need to click "Advanced Settings" - "Restore All Coefficients to Default" to update to the latest coefficients.)

"Casual" and "Easy" difficulties now have "Player-built Teleporters for Material Transport," "Move Death Bag to Player's Feet Upon Revival" switches, and "Perfect Remodel Tribesman" enabled by default.

Reduced HP of Wolf, Wasteland Wolf, and Arctic Wolf

Reduced the hatred passing distance and hearing of Plunderers in Rainforest Ruins

Enhanced yield chance and output of rubber in the ground ruins of Rainforest

The material yield chances for tribal gear will increase

[Regarding Private Server Management]

```
More convenient GM Control Panel
```

Some of the GM Directive Names will be easier to read

Loads of new commands: including send items and creatures to a designated player, join a designated tribe, as well as other optimizations on server management and convenience

```
Please check Our Wiki for more info
```

[Mount Optimizations]

After dismount, it'll revert to the armed status as it was before mounting by default

Enhanced mount speed (the speeds of the corresponding wild creatures also increase slightly)

Fixed the issue where the remaining captured mounts and pets couldn't be controlled by anyone after the owner's character was deleted

Fixed the issue where while pressing "=" to keep walking, the mount still walks away on its own after dismount

[Optimized Process of Capturing Jaguars]

Reduced quantity of jaguar footprints you need to collect

Reduced time needed to track down female jaguars

```
Extended tracking failure countdown
```
```
Shortened female jaguar's field of view
```

Increased distance needed to track down female jaguars

Added an notification - "Finding food (tracking)", when players are within the range of tracking female jaguars

Changed the notification when players are too far away and exceed the Max Tracking Distance

Shortened female jaguar spawn area properly, reduced chance of female jaguars getting stuck in terrains

[Regarding Bugs]

Fixed the issue where player can’t enter the room if its password contains special characters

Fixed the issue where Anti-climb Thorns are ineffective

Fixed the issue where while carrying the NPC and being squeezed to death by Anaconda cause the NPC becomes abnormal

Fixed the issue where carrying people is abnormal while sitting on a Grass Mat/Stool

Fixed the issue of abnormal display of preview window after hiding the mask

Fixed the issue of characters getting stuck in Holy Ruins of Rift Valley

Fixed the issue where while Durability Cost is disabled, the durability of collecting tools is still deducted

Fixed the incorrect damage instances of the Spear Mastery "Overturn"

The bag dropped underground due to anomalies will be teleported beside the character’s feet

Fixed the issue of the disappeared portal in Death Package

Fixed the issue of no mineral output when reviving and returning to the mine point to continue to mine

Fixed the issue where when the player returns home with debuffs, tribesmen would stop working and prepare to fight

Fixed the issue where when tribesmen are in a low mood, they'd stop working and keep switching tools

Fixed the issue of the overly high movement speed of little panthers

All animals under the player’s name are cleared when character is deleted

Fixed the issue where Mysterious Tisane can be used on tribesmen that are not the original character created by player

Thank you very much for your support and understanding. More optimizations and updates are on the way.

Join discord: https://discord.com/invite/4G2K7FDbtp

Soulmask Early Access Hotfix 01 June 4

Dear Chieftains,

To provide a better gaming experience, the server will undergo maintenance. It will be temporarily unavailable starting from June 4, at 7:00 AM UTC, with an expected downtime of 30 minutes. This update includes a client update, and chieftains will need to update their client to enjoy the game normally. We are very grateful for your understanding and support.

The update details are as follows:

[Game Optimizations]

Added Deter protection; activating Deter no longer inflicts damage on either side.

The production of advanced wood also yields additional logs alongside the hardwood.

Adjusted the Stone Barrier's model to eliminate collisions with its bottom protrusions.

Optimized the attack range of the Butcher's Knife to prevent missing resources from small animals.

Map mark function now accepts space inputs.

Being infected with the plague will no longer result in death; it will only progress to a state of near-death at most.

Adjusted the consumption speed of Bee-drawing Syrup; for every additional bee, the cost of Bee-drawing Syrup is reduced to two units.

When placing a bonfire, the system checks for terrain obstructions to prevent getting stuck in rocks upon respawning.

The load no longer affects the rolling speed and distance, as long as Max Load is not exceeded.

Improved connection stability in online rooms for a smoother multiplayer experience.

Rainforest Flint bosses (including those in mangroves), Claw bosses, and Fang Barracks bosses on the hill now guarantee deerskin as a drop.

Punching with bare hands can now inflict damage on trees.

Reduced the durability drop speed of weapons and gear.

Increased the crafting EXP earned for certain items.

Adjusted the materials required to craft a Water Bucket, replacing Copper Wire with Copper Ingots.

Fixed the issue where tribesmen would behave abnormally in water-related works in homes without a well.

Added a command "ResetOneFrontNpc" for solo play and friends mode to reset humanoid NPCs unintentionally trapped within walls back to their spawn locations.

[Sound Effects Related]

Fixed the issue where ambient sound effects might not trigger.

Fixed the issue where some players experience a halt in background music upon entering the game.

Lowered the volume of sounds associated with enemy alert and being spotted.

Lowered the volume of sounds associated with crafting and logging activities.

[Keybinding Settings Related]

Added a keybinding setting for "Press and hold to switch to other styles" to fix the conflict between the Construction mode and movement commands on French keyboards.

Added a keybinding setting for "Keeping running".

Added a keybinding setting for "Call mount to follow."

Players can now press the subtract (-) key on the numeric keypad to open the game console.

[Quests Related]

Fixed the issue preventing completion of the Alpaca quest in specific scenarios.

Optimized the quests that require placing various constructions; now, interacting with existing crafting tables suffices for quest completion, eliminating the need for placing multiple identical constructions within a guild to meet quest requirements.

Fixed the crafting quest for Beast Bone Weapons where weapons crafted by tribesmen did not contribute to quest completion.

Tutorial quests can now be skipped using the PageDown key.

[Combat Related]

Fixed the issue where certain skills (such as Dual-blade leap attacks) could pull the player back to the original position after execution.

Fixed the persistent spawning issue of NPC invaders.

Optimized the attack method of the Battering Ram, which can now deal damage to constructions above it.

The recovery period following most attack skills has been minimized, facilitating easier cancellation through jumping, moving, weapon switching, defending, or other skill actions.

Reduced the hitching/stuttering frames to prevent movements from seeming unsmooth during periods of low server frame rate.

[UI Related]

The right-click menu will now automatically close after an action is performed.

When igniting facilities that require Fuel, a corresponding prompt message is now displayed.

Parrots are now configured by default to send alerts when constructions are being attacked.

Optimized the rules for tribesmen work assignment to prevent misunderstandings during certain operations.

[Bug Fixes]

Fixed the issue where killing monsters in solo mode and exiting the game immediately would cause abnormal monster movements upon re-entering the game.

Fixed the potential loss of AI for scout NPCs when a Bonfire is put away.

Fixed the issue of resources not respawning after a server crash.

Fixed the issue where using Bandages while mounted would not instantly update the status icon.

Fixed the issue with the Throwing Knife crafting recipe producing flying Spears instead.

Adjusted the frame rate limit settings (vertical sync is now off by default and is no longer dependent on whether the game is played in fullscreen).

Fixed the issue that prevented some players from joining tribes, with an error message indicating that "cannot perform in cross server".

Fixed the issue on ultra-wide screens where players were unable to pick up bags.

Fixed the collision issue with palm trees that would trap players.

Fixed the issue where tribesmen would enter battle status (pacing around frequently) for no reason.

Fixed the issue where backstabbing barbarians would not enter combat.

Fixed the abnormal flickering issue with fireflies.

Fixed the issue with bees exhibiting an abnormal growth Speed.

Fixed the issue where adjustments to the quality multiplier for barbarians and animals had no effect.

Fixed the issue where Uncrafting Beast Bone Bows and Great Beast Bone Bows would yield Leather Rope.

Corrected the EXP gained from watering farmland.

Fixed the issue where some Bonfires would not increase the Comfort level.

Fixed the issue where crops planted at the edge of farmland were getting deleted.

Fixed the issue where tribesmen recruited during Babarian Invasion would disappear after some time.

Fixed the repairability issue affecting some gear.

Entering a near-death state while climbing will now result in falling to the ground instead of remaining suspended in mid-air

…….

Thank you very much for your support and understanding. More optimizations and updates are on the way.

Join discord: https://discord.com/invite/4G2K7FDbtp

Those are the patch notes up through June 25 for Soulmask.

Celebrity Podcast About Fixing the Planet Brought To You By Company Actively Destroying It

Posted on June 24, 2024 by Garry Kerls

LOS ANGELES — Self-proclaimed climate activist Ezra Miller has teamed up with Spotify and BP to launch a podcast spotlighting the changes individuals can make to help combat whatever it is that’s destroying the environment.

“Each week I’ll talk to some of my best friends about everyday life hacks we can do to make the Earth a little greener,” said Miller in a recent interview. “Hacks like turning off the infinity pool fountain when you’re not using it, and fueling our cars with the cleanest burning gasoline from BP. I’ll reveal more at the premiere, which will be held in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, as I’m currently only able to make public appearances in international waters. Also, the garbage patch is beautiful this time of year.”

The podcast, which will be recorded at Miller’s private Hawiian estate, will fly in celebrity guests like Taylor Swift, Kendall Kardashian, and Jay-Z to talk about the little things in life they do to save energy and reduce consumption. It will highlight significant global dilemmas to the listener and explain why it is all their fault.

“Human beings are like walking factories, taking in healthy oxygen and expelling harmful carbon dioxide,” explained BP’s head publicist Marsha Spellman. “We can only hope that ‘Our Problem’ hosted by Ezra Miller can implement positive change in the lives of our listeners for the sake of our planet.”

Climate change activists welcomed the news of the upcoming podcast.

“The amount of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere is currently the highest it has ever been in human history,” said Chad Kinney, CEO of Just Stop Warming, an anti-climate change non-profit primarily funded by BP, Exxon, and Shell. “It’s up to us, the children of mother Earth, to reverse the inexplicable emissions that are attacking our precious ozone layer. For all we know, it’s due to the fact that the Earth is holding too much sweet, sweet oil within its withering crust.”

At press time, Spotify had just greenlit season 2 of ‘Our Problem,’ adding Elon Musk as a permanent co-host.

Every Scott Pilgrim Character Ranked By How Likely It Is I Would Have Dated Them In My 20s

Posted on June 24, 2024 by Jacob VanGundy

As a queer guy who plays bass, with one foot in the nerd world and one in the hipster world, Scott Pilgrim was a huge point of identity for me in my late teens and 20s. First, as the comics, then the movie, it felt custom-made to appeal to my particular tastes. A decade later, with an animated series reigniting its cultural relevance, I’m forced to look back on the franchise and its characters with the same combination of nostalgia and embarrassment I do my 20s in general. What better way to do that than by breaking down which characters I would have dated (if i was lucky enough to have a chance) during my 20s?

44. Knives Chau

I wasn’t dating high schoolers in my 20s. Who do you think I am, Scott Pilgrim?

43. Tamara Chen

I already said I wasn’t dating high schoolers in my 20s. At least Tamara didn’t date Scott Pilgrim.

42. Roxie Richter

Roxie is way too intense for young me. Even setting aside the fact she’s a lesbian, I’d be way too scared of her to want any sort of romantic relationship with her. I would try to befriend but she’d probably think I was hitting on her and smash me to death with a hammer.

41. Gideon

I would not have dated Gideon in my 20s because I already dated him when I was 18. He was an absolute nightmare boyfriend. He was manipulative, cruel, self-involved, and the most pretentious guy I’ve ever met. Truly an evil ex.

40. Nega Scott

The manifestation of Scott’s narcissism and self-deception would frankly be too high maintenance for me in my 20s. He’s also pure evil, or whatever, but mostly it just seems like a lot of baggage.

39. Joel MacMillan

The bass player for Crash and the Boys gets ranked this low because he’s a guy who plays bass. While I was in college I had no interest in dating a guy who played bass, because I was already a guy who played bass. I was pretty self-involved but even I wasn’t interested in dating myself.

38. Julie Powers

Even when I was 20 I absolutely hated parties. Julie seems to exist exclusively at parties. It would just be too much for my anxiety-addled heart, which is a shame because someone who would call me on my BS and make me socialize is probably exactly who I needed to be with.

37. Kyle Katayanagi

As a student in the humanities, I had no time for those creeps over in STEM fields. Now that I’m in my 30s I still have no time for those creeps over in the STEM fields. Robots are cool and all but knowing how to make robots? No thanks.

36. Ken Katayanagi

Everything I said about his twin applies to Ken but his outfit makes him slightly hotter than his brother. I wouldn’t have liked him or respected him, but I for sure would have hooked up with him anyway.

35. Matthew Patel

Matthew Patel is a theater guy which eliminates him automatically from the dating pool. Sure, I’d have made out with him if we were hanging out with a mutual friend or something. But I’d be too worried about feeling pressured into seeing a local production of Cats to actually date him.

34. Todd Ingram

Todd is undeniably hot and lust would have provided some initial attraction, but it wouldn’t last. Being a guy who plays bass is strike one, overconfidence is strike two, and being a vegan is strike three. In my defense, there were a lot fewer vegan-friendly restaurants back then.

33. Scott Pilgrim

I’m not proud to admit it but I would have gone out with Scott a few times. Honestly, anyone with an X-Men patch on their jacket would get at least one date. I’d figure out that Scott was an even more self-involved version of myself eventually, but it would have taken at least a few weeks.

32. Lawrence West Pilgrim

Scott’s younger brother only briefly appears in the comics, but he’s a sneaky version of the guy who plays bass, having loaned his bass to his brother. I might date him for as long as a month before discovering that unforgivable flaw.

31. Young Neil

I’d end up dating Young Neil on and off just because we’d both frequently be the guy hanging out on a couch while our cooler friends were hanging out. His bass playing and obsession with Scott would always lead me to break up with him, but eventually, we’d both be playing a Nintendo handheld at a party and get back together for a few days.

30. Mr. Chau

Knive’s dad would be ranked much lower if I met him before dating Scott. But assuming I met him after dating Scott Pilgrim I think his desire to murder Scott would be enough of a draw for at least a brief crush on my part.

29. Gideon

I dated Gideon before my freshman year and it didn’t work out, but I probably would have taken him back. Honestly, I don’t even remember why we broke up. I’m sure I had my reasons for breaking up with him, but at the least, I would have had a rebound fling with him.

28. Plumtree

Don’t get me wrong, I love Canadian indie rock band Plumtree as much as anyone but I just wouldn’t have had the confidence to date an entire band in my 20s. Still, if I’d heard Go or Only in the Movies live in a Toronto dive bar I would have taken a stab at it.

27. Lucas “Crash” Wilson

The frontman of Crash and the Boys, Lucas has few defining characteristics. But being a frontman in a band and having comically short songs would have been enough personality for me to take him out.

26. Sandra and Monique

I know exactly how this would play out. A friend would try to set me up with either Sandra or Monique, but never having seen them separately I’d forget which one. I’d have a few awkward interactions, hoping to figure it out, but I’d never piece it together. After a few attempts, I’d resolve to never talk to either of them again to avoid a potentially awkward situation.

25. Simon Lee

It’s a big reveal in the comics that Kim’s ex, Simon Lee, was just a regularly nerdy guy. “Regular nerdy guy” describes most of the guys I dated or wanted to date in my 20s, so Simon’s odds were pretty good.

24. Cole

Cole’s only characteristic is being a drummer. I was pretty into drummers in my 20s. Sure, let’s party.

23. Michael Comeau

Comeau’s defining feature is that he knows who everyone is. All throughout college people would approach me knowing my name and details about me, who I thought of as complete strangers. I would have dated Comeau just so he could tell me who those people were and how they knew me.

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AEW News: WWE name held talks with company

Posted on June 24, 2024 by Jake Skudder

AEW News: All Elite Wrestling has reportedly held talks with a popular WWE personality who is set to leave shortly.

According to a new report from Dave Meltzer of Wrestling Observer Radio, Kayla Braxton (real name Kayla Becker) has been speaking to AEW.

“It might be AEW, it might not. There definitely was talk between her and AEW. She was looking to other things as well. It was one of those things, I was told she could see the writing on the wall” the writer claimed.

AEW News: Kayla Braxton held talks with All Elite

“They pretty much decided that Cathy Kelley and Jackie Redmond were gonna be the top two ones” Meltzer added. So she was number three so I think by that she kind of could see maybe it’s time to go somewhere else” (transcription via Cultaholic).

Braxton recently confirmed that she would be leaving WWE for a “West Coast-based opportunity,” but we do not currently know exactly what that even is.

Could she be heading to All Elite? It is certainly a possibility.

Hard Drive Does Pro Wrestling Stuff?

Yes, we cover pro wrestling news, including WWE, AEW, New Japan and sometimes the indies, so make sure that you keep checking back for everything you need to know about this great sport.

You can check out more of the content we have via our Minus World section (which also has real gaming news) and if you want to see more pro wrestling or combat sports you can check out my site FightFans!

WWE News: Kayla Braxton makes huge announcement

Posted on June 24, 2024 by Jake Skudder

WWE News: Popular WWE personality Kayla Braxton has confirmed that she will be leaving the company after 8 years.

Braxton took to Instagram to confirm that she will be leaving the company for free agency in the next week or so: “After nearly 8 years holding the microphone on WWE television, I am setting it down to pursue my next chapter. Next week at the world’s most famous arena, I will be officially signing off.

“During my years with WWE, I was able to master the art of the back-stage interview. I hope I was able to turn minutes into moments for you who watched week to week and maybe even ushered in a new fan base.

“My banter with Paul Heyman became the stuff of legend, and I am so thankful for all he has done to elevate my career. I gained a wealth of knowledge from the Wise man and for that, I’ll be eternally grateful.”

WWE News: Kayla Braxton leaving the company

“In 2016, the legendary Michael Cole brought me in to begin my WWE career as a ring announcer with NXT, but I quickly found myself touring the globe, hosting hall of fame ceremonies, kickoff shows and helping launch WWE’s first weekly morning show, “The Bump.” I exited “The Bump” after more than 200 shows and a move to Los Angeles” she added.

“Now on the west coast, I have been offered new opportunities that will further utilize the skills I gained working for the largest sports entertainment company in the world.

“I am extremely thankful to Triple H, Nick Khan, WWE and all of its partners for allowing me to be a trusted voice on WWE television for all these years. Thank you to every single person who made me feel like this was my home and that I was a part of this family.

“Thank you for taking a chance on me and welcoming this outsider with open arms. I hope I made you proud and I’d love it if you’d stay with me for this next chapter. I’m excited to reveal to all of you what I have coming up next!!!!”

Hard Drive Does Pro Wrestling Stuff?

Yes, we cover pro wrestling news, including WWE, AEW, New Japan and sometimes the indies, so make sure that you keep checking back for everything you need to know about this great sport.

ASKA Update Patch Notes June 22

Posted on June 22, 2024 by Michelle Pereira

UPDATED June 22

ASKA Hotfix – 1300 CEST, 22-JUN-24

Askarians: we have heard your concerns, and today roll out the following fixes:

Fixed AI issue where the Bear wouldn't retreat after its initial invasion attempt

Fixed Cook behaviour for when a fire burns out during the cooking process

Fixed an issue with Sled and Cart physics around Cave entrance

Players can now join their Friends' multiplayer sessions from the Steam Friends Menu

There are no weekends in Valhalla: know that we are with you.

Have fun out there!

Early Access Hotfix 1 June 21

Save game fix incoming!

ASKA Hotfix – 1300 CEST 21-JUN-24

Hey Vikings,

We've made a minor change to how game saving is handled. This is in response to the handful of players that saw save game corruption after hitting both different save options in quick succession.

This patch is a single change to eliminate any possibility of save corruption through this method. Your existing save games are not affected.

We are deeply sorry to those who experienced this issue, and have moved as quickly as possible to rectify.

The next fix we're looking at is to auto-assign multiplayer regions by IP (but they will still be possible to override). In the meantime, players are reminded to look for the drop down at the bottom on the screen when you go into the Multiplayer menu.

As a quick reminder, please utilise the bug reporting template pinned in the bug reporting sub-forum for any issues you are having to allow us to properly investigate.

We appreciate all your feedback & are trying to get round to everyone as quickly as we can.
Thank you for making this such a successful launch for us! ❤

Those are the patch notes on June 22 for ASKA.

Dread Delusion Update Patch Notes June 21

Posted on June 21, 2024 by Michelle Pereira

UPDATED June 21

The Performance Patch June 21

Developer-Tested, Goblin Approved!

Hellooooooo Delusionites!

Thank You to everyone who has continued playing, reviewing, streaming, talking about, and enjoying Dread Delusion. An additional thank you to everyone who's been reporting bugs in the forums or over in our discord!

The team has been hard at work squashing bugs and making improvements to the game. Let's talk about it!

PERFORMANCE & OPTIMIZATION

Over the course of the game’s development and post-launch, the development team has worked towards optimizing Dread Delusion. Between the large-scale isles, bustling towns with eccentric characters, and hostile fauna, the game featured a wealth of content that made certain areas run less than stellar. With this latest update, you’ll find the Oneiric Isles to be a much smoother experience, performance-wise! We’re looking at a 30% increase across the board!

Patch Notes:

Performance:

Merged meshes throughout the game, significantly improving CPU usage and fixing FPS drops when entering new regions.

Adjusted lightning in the Underlands to increase performance.

Tweaked how the game handles loading in The City of Progress region, improving performance.

General Changes:

Some music tracks have been changed (Some areas were using an incorrect track)

Added visual feedback when the player fails a charm check with the Entice spell.

Added visual feedback so the player can tell when a critical cast was performed while wearing the Ring of Spellcraft.

Made several changes to some of the roaming NPCs outside of Sepulchre to help guide players and provide general information about the region.

Removed the mention of alchemy refining in Hallowshire.

A visual aid was added on Shipwreck Isle to help players dock their airships.

Added in a system that would teleport the player back to the tutorial island if they somehow skipped it.

Quest Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue causing quests to disappear from the player's journal.

Fixed an issue during the "Whispers of Ghosts" that caused an important NPC to not spawn in the correct position.

Fixed an issue where the player could not turn in a particular quest if the players had already stolen from Vernon Berwig.

Made changes to the description in the "Madness of the King" quest to make it more clear what the player should be doing.

Fixed an issue that prevented the player from turning in the "Damn Fine Tea" quest.

Fixed an issue where the caretaker wouldn't leave after completing the quest in Thornwood Manor.

Fixed an issue in the "Madness of the King" quest where the correct dialogue option was not showing up, preventing player progression.

Fixed an issue during the "Missing Persons" quest where quitting out would permanently lock a door required for progression.

Fixed an issue that was causing Lludd to spawn inside a mushroom during the "Secrets and Spores" quest.

Fixed an issue where a key item wouldn't be removed from the players' inventory after turning in the "A Divine Captive" quest.

Fixed a UI issue during the Lost Purse quest.

General Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue causing a low-LOD model near the Lost City dungeon to remain loaded in, preventing player passage back.

Fixed an issue causing the player to run through a staircase in the clockwork tower in Hallow Town.

Fixed an issue causing the airship to dock improperly at Thornwood Manor.

Fixed an issue that was causing items in a hidden cave in Hallowshire to disappear when approaching them.

Fixed an issue where the player would get trapped on a railing in the Emberian Shipwreck

Fixed an issue where enemies could pass through walls in the Sacred Shroom area if they were aggressive to the player.

Fixed an issue that allowed the player to buy the airship more than once.

Fixed an issue that prevented the player from using the Apostatic Union's bed in Hallow Town.

Fixed an issue that prevented the player from interacting with the lore skull in the Lost Purse.

Fixed an issue making invisible walls pop up after getting the airship.

Fixed an issue causing the elevator in the Endless Isle mines to load in a weird position.

Fixed an issue where the Emberian's name was displaying as ???.

Fixed an issue where the Wikkan Faction Room was always accessible even if the player was considered disliked by the faction.

Fixed an issue where players could purchase lockpicks beyond their inventory cap.

Fixed an issue where the tentacles would show up without a truth potion at Hallow Castle.

Fixed an issue that was causing the Panoply of the Ancients achievement to not unlock.

Fixed an issue that caused Emberian Ore not to stack.

Fixed an issue causing certain traps to spawn under the floor geometry.

Fixed an issue where the NPC Ezra Thornwood would repeat their dialogue.

Fixed an issue causing a lore puzzle in Pwyll to drain all the players' mana.

Fixed an issue that was causing a Deaths Veil resource to be inaccessible on a particular island.

Fixed an issue where the river at the Thornwood Manor wouldn't animate.

Fixed an issue where the player could get stuck on a stairwell in the Lost City of Progress.

Fixed an issue causing an old spellbook description to run out of the text box.

Fixed a gap in the geometry that would appear after helping the Entombed One.

Fixed an issue that was causing Myghar's name to show up before he introduced himself.

Fixed an animation issue with an NPC at the inn at Sepulchre

Fixed an animation issue with an NPC in the Lost Purse.

Fixed an issue where the player's reputation would increase instead of decrease when going against the Outlaws.

Fixed a few dialogue issues in Pwyll that were causing NPCs to give the wrong location for quests and items.

Fixed an NPCs dialogue in the Clockwork Kingdom where they mentioned a nonexistent poster.

Fixed an issue where the background music would overlap with the Whisper of the Ghost quest music.

Fixed the Emberian Key description so it doesn't appear out of the text box.

Fixed a texture issue causing the stairs under the High Confessor in Blinding Light to overlap.

Fixed an issue causing the lore puzzle to soft-lock the game.

Fixed an issue where the count for iron ore would not increase visually

Fixed an issue causing the music to pause when the player leaves an area

Fixed an issue that was causing the Golden Typos Music not to start playing.

Fixed an issue causing a specific section in The Cradle to have no collision.

```
Fixed an open mesh in The Cradle.
```

Fixed an issue that was causing coffin details to load improperly.

Fixed an issue that was causing a rock to despawn.

Fixed an issue where a door on the Emberian Shipwreck flickered after the player opened it.

Multiple fixes to word-related issues throughout the game (e.g typos)

Multiple fixes to texture-related issues throughout the game

Multiple fixes to object-related issues throughout the game (e.g floating props, objects clipping into one another, etc.)

WHAT’S NEXT?

While the team continues bug fixing, they are also at work on a new CONTENT UPDATE that will be coming out next month. The two major parts of that update will be further improvements to the general combat, as well as a HARD MODE for players seeking more of a challenge.
Stay tuned next month for the release date of this update as well as more details.

MAKESHIP x DREAD DELUSION

Some may know that we announced this friend in collaboration with Makeship. The campaign runs for a few more days, and we are already almost funded and can't wait to go all the way!

Get your Goblin here!

As always, thank you for your reports and feedback. This ongoing process wouldn't be possible without your help and support! If you run across any issues, come tell us on our Discord Server or in the Discussion Forums.

Hotfix: Version 1.0.6.0 Update May 30

Patch Notes

General Changes:

Added in feedback so the player can tell when they have failed a charm check with the Entice spell.

Quest Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue where "The Hunt for Vela Calose" quest wouldn't update after talking to Jack Basalt.

Fixed an issue where Ludd wouldn't move after rescuing him in the "Spores and Secrets" quest.

General Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue that was causing certain location-based achievements to not unlock.

Fixed an issue that was causing a Low-LOD model in the Lost City to load in, preventing player passage back.

Fixed an issue that would have the player stuck in the crouch position.

Fixed an issue that was making an important NPC not interactable on the way to the City of Progress, preventing area entry.

Fixed a certain NPC dialogue in the Underlands that would cause the wrong character dialogue to trigger.

Fixed an issue where the player could see through a certain wall in The Cradle.

Fixed an issue where Thornwood Manor could potentially be inaccessible when the elevator was up.

Fixed an interaction bug with Vela in The Cradle

Fixed a repeating dialogue issue with Jack Basalt

Fixed an issue where a certain NPC in the Underlands was using the incorrect dialogue

Fixed an issue that would cause a large low-LOD model to load while inside the Desert Island Ship.

Fixed a respawn issue that would bring players back to Pwyll, despite being in a completely different area upon death.

Changed out the model for the Sacred Shroom

Fixed an enemy aggro issue with summoned skeletons.

Fixed an issue where selecting certain dialogue options with the Seneschal could potentially soft-lock the player.

Fixed an issue where certain areas of The Underlands didn't have collision for enemies and NPCs, preventing them from following the player.

```
Several minor collision-based fixes
```

Several minor texture & object-based fixes

```
Several minor typo/text-based fixes
```
```
Fixed several music-related issues
```

As always, thank you for your reports and feedback. This is an ongoing process and wouldn't be possible without your help and support! If you run across any issues, come tell us on our Discord Server or in the Discussion Forums.

Hotfix: Version 1.0.5.1 Update May 24

Patch Notes

General Changes:

Made some backend changes to improve overall performance in the game (This is part of an ongoing process towards improving performance.)

Balance Changes:

Bomb damage has been significantly increased (To the detriment of you and your enemies!)

Bow damage has been vastly increased to compensate for its slower attack speed

Enemies in late-game areas have been balanced properly to match player late-game stats

Increased strength scaling for all weapons

Increased magic damage scaling to match strength-based damage

Increased stamina damage to shielded enemies and reduced their stamina recovery rate to make breaking through their shield less tedious

Fixed some inconsistencies with a certain weapons damage output

Quest Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue where the player was getting locked into a cutscene during "Whispers of the Ghost" quest.

Fixed an issue where the player could potentially get stuck on a certain piece of dialogue in the "Madness of the King" quest.

Fixed an issue where the "Whisper of the Ghosts" quest would potentially not begin.

General Bug Fixes:

Made it clear that the Rotten Onion guards cannot be affected by the Entice spell.

Fixed an issue that was preventing players from accessing certain pockets of the small Endless Isle accessed via airship.

Fixed an issue that left the elevator ramp clipping into the elevator that led to Caxton Frost's house in The Clockwork Kingdom

Fixed an issue where the Clockwork Kingdom player housing unit would block players from accessing certain floors.

Fixed an issue with the Seneschal's dialogue options

Fixed an issue where the lamp outside of the weapon's shop in Hallow Town could be used as a forge.

Fixed an issue that was causing NPCs to walk into each other in Hallowshire

Fixed an animation issue with Jack Basalt in the Underlands

Fixed a repeating dialogue issue with Jack Basalt

Fixed an issue where a certain NPC in the Underlands was using the incorrect dialogue

Fixed an issue that would cause the NPC near the Hallowshire Castle to repeat their dialogue.

Removed dialogue from an NPC mentioning a non-existent property station in Hallow Town

Fixed an interaction area issue with an NPC in Pwyll

Fixed an animation issue with Vela in The Underlands.

Fixed an issue where enemies were spawning in an incorrect position, leaving them stuck on a rock

Fixed an issue where some players were getting stuck near the Emberian Vault Key

Changed the SFX for the Emberian elevator to match the animations

Fixed an issue that prevented the name window during dialogue from updating after meeting certain NPCs

Fixed a duplicate dialogue issue in the final encounter

Fixed an issue where players could clip into a house in The Underlands

Fixed a texture issue in the Clockwork Ruins.

Fixed placeholder text for the Sleeper Mask

Fixed an issue where the Paradoxicus description would run out of the text box.

Fixed the placeholder image for the Summoner's Earing.

Fixed an issue that was making the Emberian Armor unrepairable

Fixed a floating bush in the Clockwork Kingdom.

Fixed an issue where enemies would lose interest in the player if they closed a door on them

```
Removed a placeholder object in the sky
```
```
Fixed several music-related issues
```

As always, thank you for your reports and feedback. This is an ongoing process and wouldn't be possible without your help and support! If you run across any issues come tell us on our Discord Server or in the Discussion Forums.

Hotfix: Version 1.0.4.0 Update May 21

Patch Notes

Misc. Changes:

Added a dock to the entry point of the Shipwreck Isle to help direct players to its starting point.

Quest Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue that was causing the Caxton Frost quest "Bottled Visions" to not progress during a certain step.

General Bug Fixes:

Fixed the description for upgrade requirements for shroomweave, void and clockwork weapons to display the correct material.

Fixed an issue where equipping the Ring of Barter accessory would not increase the players Barter skill

Fixed a collision issue on Shipwreck Isle that allowed players to potentially get stuck

Fixed an issue with the Fade spell's behavior with certain enemies

```
Fixed several music issues
```

If you run across any issues come tell us on our Discord Server or in the Discussion Forums.

Hotfix: Version 1.0.3.0 Update May 20

Patch Notes

Quest Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue that was causing the spore scales in the quest "Secrets and Spores" to not work

Fixed an issue that made players unable to complete a certain step in "Madness of the King"

Fixed an issue that was allowing the quest "The God Hunt" to finish prematurely

Fixed an issue caused by robbing Vernon Berwig before starting the quest "From Under His Nose"

Fixed an issue where the High Confessor would send you to speak with Basalt before telling you that you've already spoken with Basalt

General Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue that temporarily caused players to take no damage and removed the ability to parry

Fixed a bug that was causing players to get stuck looking at the housing upgrade window in the Blinding Light

Fixed an issue that caused spells to unequip after a region change while wearing equipment that raised the spellcast stat. (Note: The window will still claim that they've been removed, but the spell will remain equipped. We are currently working on fixing this.)

Fixed an issue that would cause the Cadaver faction to remain hostile, even if you were considered accepted by them

Fixed a collision issue with the Erudite Academy elevator

Fixed an issue that was causing certain respawn points to not register properly

Fixed an issue that was preventing players from sleeping in Hallowshire

Fixed an issue in which dialogue with a certain NPC was softlocking players

We also wanted to mention that we're aware of the performance issues players are facing during their adventures in the Oneiric Isles (Thank you all again for your detailed reports!). The team is currently working towards addressing these issues. This includes performance on Steam Deck as well!

If you run across any issues come tell us on our Discord Server or in the Discussion Forums.

Hotfix: Version 1.0.2.2 Update May 17

Patch Notes

Quest Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue where the scales weren't registering during the "Secrets and Spores" quest, preventing progression.

Fixed an issue where the goblin ship wasn't present, preventing progression in "The Whispers of Ghosts" quest.

Prevented quest completion of "A Debt Unpaid" if you killed the mercenaries in the Rotten Onion base.

Fixed an issue where "The Rasmussen Sphere" quest couldn't be turned in under certain conditions.

And as always, please post any issues you come across or feedback you may have in our Discord or in the Discussion Forums.

Hotfix: Version 1.0.1.0 Update May 16

Patch Notes

Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue where certain achievements weren't triggering.

Fixed an issue where the player's perspective was locked during dialogue with a certain NPC in the Clockwork Kingdom.

Fixed an issue where using a truth potion in the journal menu would break the UI.

Fixed an issue where the Leech of Truth would use mana but not work as intended.

Fixed an issue where the Goblin Mask wasn't working as intended.

Fixed an issue where the player could walk out of bounds near the house in the Underlands.

Fixed an issue where the player would get locked in the crouched position when speaking with NPCs.

Fixed an issue where the Ring of Stoneskin does't give the player more armor.

Fixed an issue where building prices would increase after the player built the quarters in the Blinding Light

Made it so the Plague Flechette poison effect works correctly

Stopped enemies from spawning in the ground in the Endless Isles

Fixed an issue where the stairs for player housing in the Clockwork Kingdom would not have any collision

Fixed an issue where the player would get stuck by the LOD of the spinning house in the Lost City.

Quest Bug Fixes:

Fixed an issue where the Flesh Farm quest in the Endless Isle was showing the incorrect player choice when speaking to a certain NPC.

Fixed an issue where The Rasmussen Sphere quest would not update in the journal log.

Fixed an issue where the Rotten Onion gang could be hostile even after being charmed.

Fixed an issue during the Secrets and Spores quest where an NPC could clip through a door, leaving the quest broken.

And as always, please post any issues you come across or feedback you may have in our Discord or in the Discussion Forums.

Those are the patch notes on June 21 for Dread Delusion.

Game Night: Let’s Kill Some Dreams With ‘The Tower on the Borderland’

Posted on June 21, 2024 by Thomas Wilde

“Over the centuries, mankind has tried many ways of combating the forces of evil,” the late Terry Pratchett wrote. “Prayer, fasting, good works, and so on. Up until Doom, no one seemed to have thought about the double-barrel shotgun.”

I was reminded of that quote while playing The Tower on the Borderland. It’s a story of lurking cosmic horror, where a procession of nightmares from beyond the veil of sleep all get their shit conclusively wrecked by one woman with an assault rifle. Take that, Lovecraft.

The Tower on the Borderland is a distinctly Eurojank horror game that’s now available on Steam. Playing it often feels like you’re trapped in somebody else’s hostile dream. It’s got a slow-burn atmosphere of dread that never lets up throughout its 4- to 6-hour running time.

The problem is that its reach exceeds its grasp. Tower is frequently buggy, feels distinctly underbaked, and has a number of features that don’t work reliably or well. You can see the shape of a better game underneath it, but as it is, Tower is strictly for horror fanatics.

A special forces unit has been dispatched to investigate a strange tower. Under protest, they’ve brought a rookie, Erin, along for the ride. Upon arrival, the other soldiers leave Erin in the lobby to set up a comms array.

Since the relay will work better if she gets some height, Erin gets in an elevator. At that point, she discovers that the higher you go in the tower, the further it takes you into an ethereal borderland between the waking and dreaming worlds. There are monsters here, and Erin’s squad will be no help at all.

Much of The Tower on the Borderland feels like it runs off of dream logic. You’re trapped in an elaborate maze of corridors, which alternate between old-fashioned offices and overgrown insect hives. The enemies are all rich with cheap symbology, like mealworms with vaguely human faces, naked zombies with clubs, or skeletal soldiers in full tactical armor. It’s not subtle, but it doesn’t have to be

(Incidentally, here’s your arachnophobia warning. If you don’t like spiders, Tower starts bad and gets worse.)

Like Crow Country, Tower uses the washed-out aesthetic of early PlayStation games for a deliberate purpose. Here, everything is always slowly materializing out of darkness or fog. This is a place that can’t decide what it is or why.

I think that’s why I’m not more annoyed about how difficult it is to navigate the tower. Everything often looks the same, but that gives the environments the same feel as those nightmares about being chased down an infinite corridor. Without the in-game map, I’d have been constantly lost.

That sense of disorientation is what gives Tower’s atmosphere most of its impact. As a survival horror game, it’s a little off-balance, primarily due to some mechanics it’s borrowed from Soulslikes.

Most of the tension in the classic survival horror formula comes from the player’s uncertainty about resources. Every bullet feels precious, so you never know if it’s worth fighting through any given encounter. Tower doesn’t do that. Instead, every save point automatically refills Erin’s health and supplies to their current maximum, while also bringing back most of the monsters in the tower.

That turns most of Tower into a relay race, where you try to get as far away from your latest save point as possible before you’re forced to turn back. Erin’s also equipped with a surprisingly powerful knife and a dodge move with a long invincibility window, so being low on ammunition often doesn’t matter. A few enemies are difficult to handle in melee range, but you can carve the rest up like Christmas hams.

That ends up doing some damage to the game’s overall atmosphere. It’s never less than creepy, but the kind of slow-build Lovecraftian horror it’s going for isn’t quite as effective when you’re actively styling on every monster you bother to fight. Other characters keep calling Erin the “rookie,” but the trail of bodies in her wake says otherwise.

You gradually find better weapons and gear as you progress, but the assault rifle is what really breaks the game. After that, it’s all over but the shouting. Only one fight gave me any real trouble once I had the rifle, and even then, it’s because that boss can somehow hit you straight through solid walls. I ended up beating him by glitching out his attack pattern, and I feel great about it.

That boss fight was the cherry on top of a procession of performance issues that accumulated over the time I spent with Tower. It’s not the most unstable game I’ve played on Steam, but it does give the impression of being held together with spit and baling wire. Enemy behavior is a particular sticking point, but Tower routinely has issues with collision detection, broken animations, and monsters clipping through the floor.

That’s layered on top of systems that work but don’t feel complete. There are a lot of little problems in Tower that drag down the whole, like a camera that frequently works against you, animations that don’t look finished, and how difficult it is to navigate the in-game map.

At the end of the day, I’d only recommend The Tower on the Borderlands to serious horror fans. It’s got great atmosphere and an interestingly weird story to tell, but plays like an alpha test that got released by mistake. I’d be interested in seeing what the same creator could do with more time and money, though.

[The Tower on the Borderland, published and developed by DascuMaru, is currently available on Steam for $15.99. This review was written using a Steam code sent to Hard Drive by the game’s developer.]