Jeremy Kaplowitz
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ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local gamer Joe Fleming is reportedly worried that Nintendo’s stunning masterpiece Breath of the Wild has ruined…
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Kevin Flynn
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BROCKTON, Mass. — Noting the fact that she keeps falling behind to the edge of the screen and dying repeatedly, local…
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Mark Roebuck
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SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Recent sexual partner Nathan Stenhouse has released an apology for his unacceptably short load time during last…
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Bailey Hull
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AMARILLO, Texas — Passing over the controller like King Arthur surrendering Excalibur itself, sources report that local hero Lance Mason…
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Ashley Naftule
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TEMPE, Ariz. — ASU student Shelly Campbell has started dating local realtor Aaron Jackson two months after breaking up with…
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Erik Barnes
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TOLEDO, Ohio — A lovelorn man was surprised to see that he had been “ghosted” by Love Bubble Yeah!—a dating…
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M.J. Amory
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LOS ANGELES — Graduating high school senior Cheryl Dowd announced she has no plans to port what has so far…
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