Best Jump Scares in Games Ranked by the Sounds That Came Out of My Mouth

Posted on by Nik Theorin

In most storytelling mediums, fear is considered to be one of the trickiest emotions to instill in an audience. Books have to spend whole pages and chapters of text building dread for even the slightest payoff. Good horror TV shows are few and far between. Even movies, which maintain a very profitable relationship with the horror genre, need at minimum excellent use of sound and at least a spark of ingenuity to make you jump.

Then, there’s video games, which have it so easy you can basically make the scariest experience someone will ever play by leaving your dog alone with your computer for the weekend and spilling treats across the keyboard with the Unity Asset Store open. That is to say, video games and jump scares go together like Teslas and heinous acts of Looney Tunes carnage. Today I’ll be ranking the best jump scares I remember from video games, based on the uncontrollable sounds my mouth made the moment they registered with my brain.

#31: Wolverine in the Cupboard: Until Dawn

“No.”

No was the sound this jump scare made come out of my mouth. In one of the opening sections of the game, you’re searching a dark house when your current character Chris, cosplaying as Mark from RENT, kneels down to open a cupboard, and… a wolverine jumps out at the camera. I guess it was… nesting in the cupboard? And chose this moment to realize cupboards are no place for a wild animal? Guys, this is what you came up with? You spent millions on Hayden Panettiere (valid) but you couldn’t find a single brain cell to come up with a more plausible jump scare? No.

#30: First Encounter with Bloody Hairy Spider Girl: The Evil Within

“EWWICKOMIGODNOOOOOGETAWAY!”

…is what I might’ve said upon seeing the bloody hairy spider girl screech and explode from the floor for the first time, if this wasn’t possibly the most publicized moment of The Evil Within’s entire announcement and launch campaign. This very moment. The success of an original IP $60 horror game hinged on one crazy leggy chick exploding from the ground in a mist of blood. And you know what? It worked. You can be damn sure I bought The Evil Within on release for jump scares like these, and I’d do it again.

#29: Scarecrow in the Body Bag: Batman: Arkham Asylum

“What the devil!”

True story: despite growing up in a decidedly not-Christian household, cursing was very much off-limits, even during moments of intense fright. Such as when Batman, under the influence of fear gas, slowly unzips three body bags in a morgue in the Arkham basement, only to get jump-scared on the last one by the king of scares himself, Scarecrow, who grabs you and injects you with his nasty used-needle glove. For several strange years during my adolescence, the archaic, borderline Shakespearean curse “What the devil?” was very much part of my vocabulary, and very much came out of my mouth during this jump scare.

#28: Nun: Nun Massacre 

“JFFVRRGRREEVJFF!”

This is approximately the series of syllables released by my lips any time the titular Nun appeared onscreen in this Puppet Combo snack of a game: a hard J sound that may have been the start of the word “Jesus”, followed by a sort of breathy fluttering of F and V sounds. JFFVRRGRREEVJFF. Kind of rolls off the tongue, no? A natural, human sound, quite unlike the sound the game makes whenever the Nun comes barreling toward you at sub-walking speed, because that sound, like the names of some Gods, has no written equivalent.

#27: A Necromorph Bursts Through the Vent: Dead Space 1-3

“Oh, hey.”

This is scary maybe the first ten times, max.

#26: Anglerfish in Your Face: Outer Wilds

“Jesus Christ NO NO—!”

Outer Wilds is excellent and by no means a scary game, but that doesn’t mean it won’t randomly decide to throw a bonafide horror level into the last hour or two of the game and make traversing it repeatedly at the speed of nothing a requirement for getting the ending. Apparently, the developers thought this part was so fun they started doing straight-up horror in the game’s DLC, Echoes of the Eye, which would be cruel if it wasn’t so funny.

#25: Realizing Monika is Not Romanceable: Doki Doki Literature Club!

“Awwwwwww.”

Just kidding. It’s the other moment you’re all thinking of.

#24: Wooooo Guy: Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice

“What’s that sound— OH LAWD HE COMIN’.”

FromSoftware, the developers behind Dark Souls and Elden Ring, aren’t exactly known for their jump scares, and Woo Guy—as he’s affectionately known—technically announces his presence beforehand. So, is this actually a jump scare? Well, read those words again, slowly. Jump scare.

And my god, what a jump. Encountered while traversing the roof of Ashina Castle, Woo Guy dive-bombs the player from a kite flying in the stratosphere while shouting his infamous “WOOOOOOOOO!” The attack comes out of nowhere, is hard to dodge, and half the time will straight-up one-shot you. All of these things make Woo Guy a Nightjar Ninja to be respected and, most importantly for this list, feared.

#23: Bear Trap: LIMBO

“Okay.”

Sometimes simple acceptance is best.

#22: Dan is Screaming Over the Mic and There’s Nothing I Can Do: Lethal Company

“Dan? Dan, buddy, listen to me, I– no, listen. I can’t come get you. Dan. Dan. I’m at the ship with all our scrap. I’m sorry, I want to… I want to help… but… you know I can’t do that. It would be wrong to do that, after what we sacrificed to get here. Yes, Kyle and Soph are here. Their bodies, yes. We’re all here, Dan, waiting for you to come home. I’m sorry, Dan. I’m so, so sorry. Dan, please don’t, if you cry… if you cry, I’m gonna… I love you, buddy. This isn’t goodbye. This is… this is ‘See you later’, okay? I’ll see you later, Dan. Dan please stop screaming, I can’t listen, it’s too much. I’m turning the radio off now, okay? God. Dan, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

#21: Six Takes a Bite: Little Nightmares

“THE SAUSAGE WAS RIGHT THERE.”

Little Nightmares is a game chock-full of scary moments, from long-armed janitors to hungry guests to seriously dubious platforming sections, but the scene that made me jump and had my mouth producing the titular sounds didn’t involve any monsters— that is, unless you count the player character, Six. Which I do. A little girl in a waking nightmare, Six suffers from debilitating hunger pains periodically throughout the game, and you’re forced to Very Hungry Caterpillar your way through moldy bread, meat, a live rat, and finally, in a climactic scene, one of the game’s innocent Nomes. The moment Six takes a long, lethal bite of the little guy’s neck instead of the sausage he kindly offers is the moment you come to realize simping for her might be harder than previously thought. If you’ve played Little Nightmares II, you know it gets even harder.

#20: Myers Grabs You Off the Gen: Dead by Daylight

“Put me down, rogue! Unhand me this instant!”

I’ve tried issuing the above command to any and all Shape players who manage to land a gen grab in Dead by Daylight. Lucky for me, I’m a Mikaela main, so killers usually recognize my inherent superiority and release me instantly— but you, a filthy Feng Min player, may not be so lucky.

#19: Is That a Penis?: Amnesia: The Dark Descent

“Is that a penis?”

Amnesia: The Dark Descent is not only one of the greatest horror games of all time and not only one of the most influential indies to hit Steam ever: it’s also among the top five games on the market today that will make you squint and say, “Is… is that a penis?” Forget the horrible servants with flapping, bloody jaws. Forget the genre-defining helplessness and perfectly crafted haunted house levels. Forget the funny British man. If you look closely at a few character models (and one very obvious character model), you’ll find something no 13 year-old ever expected to see in a video game. It haunts me to this day.

#18: Creeper: Minecraft

“STAY AW—” *silence*

While no one knows who created Minecraft, we are able to infer some things about its designer by looking at the game itself. For example, the blocky, retro aesthetic and wide-open sandbox world tells us the creator probably had a playful, childlike spirit. Meanwhile, the Creeper, a now-iconic enemy in the game with an appearance unlike anything of this earth who sneaks up behind players and explodes, tells us Minecraft’s creator was a sick, sadistic Willy Wonka-type who enjoyed the anguish of children. The design of these insane suicide bombers becomes especially bizarre in retrospect, now that it’s been decades since I first touched the game. Just what was going on here? Why were these guys created? They’re walking jump scares. Their only purpose is to rob you in an instant of everything you know, leaving only a hole in its place and the seeds of your adult atheism.

#17: Grandma Around Every Corner: Resident Evil 7: Biohazard

“Christ on a stick!”

There are a lot of scary games that don’t make this list simply because I couldn’t remember any definitive jump scares from them. Sure, they may have a lot of dread and atmosphere, but do they have moments that startle you, moments you might see in a compilation video of annoying Let’s Players on YouTube? Do they have a teleporting grandma who appears in a rocking chair around the corner when you least expect her? Grandma is in my opinion the best and most understated “jump scare” in Resident Evil 7: Biohazard, a game not exactly short on scares. Or shovels to the face, for that matter.

#16: The Residents of New Londo Ruins: Dark Souls

“Jeepers! Is that a g-g-g-g-ghost?”

Damn you, FromSoftware. You could’ve just phoned it in when designing a ghost enemy for your video game, but you went and made it sad and otherworldly and terrifying like always. New Londo Ruins is a scary, half-submerged city made all the scarier for its twisting layout, narrow walkways, and late-game toughness. And, of course, the ghosts: bony white shrouds drifting through the air and through the walls like silk in water, wielding long knives in arms that grow long and extend toward you for a lethal embrace. You can’t hurt them without a special consumable, but they can sure hurt you. And yet, you have to pity them. The denizens of New Londo all drowned when the city was flooded to contain the spread of the Abyss. Some of the ghosts even clutch babies to their chests as they shriek in despair.

One of the first ghosts you encounter reaches its long arms through the wall to stab you, an ambush that briefly unleashed an inner Scooby-Doo I didn’t know I had.

#15: All of It: Subnautica

“I want to go home. I WANT TO GO HOME.”

Subnautica is an amazing game, one of my favorites of all time. If I had to choose between swimming in the Crash Zone again and hammering rusty nails into my eyes until the light faded, I would take the nails.

#14: The First Manpig Sighting: Amnesia: A Machine for Pigs

“Haha no nah I’m good, thanks though!”

The second game in the Amnesia series, Amnesia: A Machine for Pigs has such good writing (courtesy of game devs The Chinese Room, and Dan Pinchbeck in particular, I love you Dan) you might forget it’s also incredibly scary. I’m talking hypothetically, of course. I never forgot. A Machine for Pigs does not let you forget. Even if you aren’t in as much danger as the game would have you think, the first Manpig you see darting across the darkness at the bottom of a set of stairs should serve as a stark reminder. Pro tip: I’ve found voicing your concerns about the direction things are taking and politely asking the game to please stop is a great way to set boundaries for future scares.

#13: That CAKE: Outlast

“Oh, oh jeez, wow, WOW.”

Damn, is it getting hot in here? Rick Trager may not be a real doctor, but he can strap me to a chair and give me a physical any time.

#12: You Finally Understand Why Mom Warned You About the Internet: The Maze

“My 12 year-old brain will never recover from this.”

Some call it Scary Maze Game, others just call it The Maze. I call it the best case against the theory of Intelligent Design, because why would God let this creation exist in His Kingdom? We all know the basics: You have to move your mouse cursor through a maze without touching the walls. There are three levels. If you touch a wall before the third level, the game just restarts. If you touch a wall on level 3, your prepubescent brain gets obliterated. Your life changes. You start seeing evil in the eyes of priests, something darker than dark in unlit hallways. You keep your computer’s volume on mute, and you don’t watch YouTube videos without scrubbing through first. Because you, the King of Fools, made the ultimate mistake: for one defining moment when you thought you were playing a fun computer game, you stared straight into the abyss… and Regan MacNeil stared back.

#11: Dear God, That Wasn’t the End?: The Last of Us Part II

“HELL IS EMPTY AND ALL THE DEVILS ARE HERE.”

Okay, this one genuinely startled me, to the extent that I announced to no one in particular that Hell was empty and all the devils were, in fact, here. One such devil is Neil Druckmann.

After hour upon grueling hour of playing The Last of Us Part II, the game finally comes to an end with Ellie and Dina living together on a farm, where Ellie wrestles with the weight of her actions and, in the final moments, is tempted by Tommy to resume her hopeless revenge quest against Abby, while Dina begs her to stay. Has she learned her lesson, or will she walk the path of two graves? By every sane measure, the game is set to end here. Which is why I all but literally jumped out of my damn seat when the screen faded to black and instead of credits, we switch back to Abby. There’s a whole two hours of game left, people! Full of torture, slavers, a comically overwrought Porco Rosso-esque fight in the water, and Ellie learning the world’s most obvious lesson for the second time over. Then it all ends, for real, back at the farm again. It’s the longest ending I’ve experienced since Lord of the Rings.

#10: Accidentally Ending Your Turn: Slay the Spire

“This is fine.”

This is not fine. This is the worst moment of your life, and you would be wise to end it all. You’re never beating Heart now.

#9: The Dentist: Bioshock

“NAHHGGH NAHH AHHH AH!”

The old “spawn an enemy behind the player after they pick up an item needed to progress” trick will never really die as long as it remains so effective. The dentist from the first Bioshock is one of the earliest examples in memory, and boy, when he gets you, he gets you good. Your mouth opens and the syllables just come toppling out like dominoes. Apparently Irrational Games liked this jump scare so much they repeated it exactly in Bioshock Infinite with a Boy of Silence, which might be considered lazy until you remember game development is hard, especially when your boss is Ken Levine.

#8: Alien in the Vent OH GOD Alien in the Vent: Alien: Isolation

*weeping*

My game is still paused to this day.

#7: Trapped in the Maze with Leon: Amnesia: Rebirth

“My 23 year-old brain will never recover from this.”

Just when you think you’ll never play the Scary Maze Game again, Amnesia: Rebirth hits you with a scary maze. I love every Amnesia for different reasons, and Rebirth’s strengths lie in its worldbuilding, creative and unexpected enemy variety, and compelling protagonist, Tasi Trianon. The maze sequence combines all of these elements. My favorite moment of dread comes before you even enter the maze, when Tasi comes across a chess board-size scale model of the entire alien labyrinth along with notes describing its purpose, which is to provoke a sustained fear response in subjects. In that moment, you know you’re going in that maze.

Inside there are dead ends, a puzzle or two, spindly gates that spring up when you step on pressure plates to block your path, and a raving, transformed former colleague, Leon. On my first playthrough, I was so paralyzed with fear that I couldn’t solve the first “puzzle” needed to get through one of the corridors. The solution was jumping. Just jump over the pressure plate.

Reader, I was hard stuck.

#6: General Grievous Appears: Grievous Onslaught

“Well I guess that’s the level OH MY GOD, IT’S GENERAL GRIEVOUS WITH THE STEEL CHAIR!”

I can’t tell you how old I was because I don’t remember, but one of the first video games I ever owned was a game called Plug it in and Play: Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith. It came with a Star Wars-themed controller and a collection of five arcade-style games. One of these was Grievous Onslaught, which tasks you with clearing rooms of droids as Anakin Skywalker in order to rescue Chancellor Palpatine. There’s no horror at all, save for the sting of defeat when you lose all three lives.

Oh, but if you wait too long in a cleared room (“too long” being maybe ten seconds), the man, the myth, the Jedi-killing legend General Grievous himself LEAPS INTO THE ROOM from above with all four lightsabers swinging and starts jumping around like a rabid kangaroo until you leave or die. He is INVINCIBLE and he smells your fear. The gif doesn’t do it justice; the sound of those metal feet hitting the floor amid total silence was scary. This isn’t the coughing, cowardly Episode III Grievous. This is Jason Vorhees, 2002 Clone Wars cartoon Grievous. He scared me and my brother so many times, I can only imagine how Jedi icon Sha’a Gi felt in the moment he was crushed into nothingness on Hypori.

#5: The Beast Drags You into a Hole: Amnesia: The Bunker

“Hrup!”

I had never said the word hrup before being dragged into one of the Beast’s holes in Amnesia: The Bunker, and, God willing, I don’t expect to ever say it again. Evading the snarling creature is a tricky business, since it’s always prowling, but at least it doesn’t try to hide its presence. That is, except for the moments when you can spot its soft breath misting from one of the large holes that open at waist height along every other wall. If you don’t spot it and you walk by said hole, the Beast grabs you and drags you in for an instant game over, but not before you can get out a single, muted hrup!

#4: The Animatronics Get You: Five Night at Freddy’s

“Crikey, she’s a big one!”

At long last, we get to the jump scare simulator that spawned a franchise and a mediocre blockbuster. These animatronics aren’t shy about letting you know the moment they’ve bypassed your weirdly futuristic double door setup (a setup the movie was cowardly not to portray). When I played Five Nights and got jump-scared for the first time, the experience was so intense I momentarily transformed into a caricature of an Australian man gazing in wonder at a large croc. It was the only way my brain could handle what it was seeing.

#3: Mr. X Appears: Resident Evil 2 Remake

“Here comes the *boy*! Hello, boy. Welcome. There he is. He is here.”

The sound of those footsteps could kill a man. Capcom must have realized the classic roaming enemy Mr. X was too scary for modern gamers, which is why in the remake they gave him a funny little hat. Unfortunately, for reasons unknown to science, the hat somehow makes him scarier.

#2: Anglerfish (Again): SOMA

“FHJFHGSDFUOGHOUGNOUDFNBUEhrupNFVOUWENFOUWNVOERNBOIERNVW!”

I would like to take this moment to address SOMA’s creative director, Thomas Grip, a man I deeply admire and respect, directly.

Thomas. You mad dog. You brilliant, evil man. I respect you. I’ve read every Tweet, every blog post in Frictional’s now-defunct In the Games of Madness blog. You went too far with this jump scare, Thomas. You were too concerned with whether you could trick the player into walking into the gaping maw of a mutated anglerfish by making them rely on a series of light posts to mark the correct path at the bottom of the ocean and then positioning the anglerfish’s lure as the last light you go toward, you didn’t stop to think whether you should trick the player into walking into the gaping maw of a mutated anglerfish. This is one of the cruelest, most well-planned jump scares I’ve ever seen, and I’d respect it if it didn’t make me pronounce the above string of syllables exactly, letter for letter, every time I think about it, which is often.

#1: Lisa Tries to Kiss You and Fails So Bad You Die: P.T.

“Ha ha babe, not now, stop… babe stop, haha… babe stop… BABE STOP… BABE STOP, BABE—!”

A masterpiece lost to Konami’s greatest fumble of all time, P.T. is terrifying and claustrophobic in a way few AAA titles will ever achieve. It has spawned countless clones and inspired hundreds of horror games big and small, but all of these games fail to capture what made P.T. so special: the promise of a spectacularly bad kiss from the world’s horniest ghost. All Lisa wants to do is give you, the player, a smooch, but for some reason, either due to her unresolved hatred and the lingering torment from her murder or the fact that she frew up, she is simply unable to do it without failing so badly it kills you. With any luck, Hideo Kojima will one day get the greenlight to make Silent Hills, and the ghosts of P.T. on so many PS4s will finally be able to pass on into the afterlife, where I will be waiting for my love to return to me for one final, perfect jump scare.

Call Of Duty: Mobile Codes January 2024

Posted on by Michelle Pereira

If Call of Duty on PC and consoles was not enough for you, now you can have Call of Duty on mobile too, with all the F2P mechanics you could ask for. This is a list of all currently active codes for Call of Duty: Mobile that should ease the grind for cosmetics and currencies just a tiny bit.

Tip: Since you’re here, be sure to read up on our coverage of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 and all the helpful tips and tricks on offer.

 

Active Call of Duty: Mobile Codes

The most recent Call of Duty: Mobile codes are listed first.

CLTDZBZXGA

 

CLAVZBZEFH

 

CLARZBZ7UE

 

Goddess of Victory: Nikke Codes January 2024

 

Recent Call of Duty: Mobile Codes

The following codes are relatively recent and you should try them out just to be certain that they are not active.

CKKLZBZGCF
CJLLZBZ6QC
CJQTZBZRW3
CJRDZBZXMC
CJRBZBZWTG

 

MORE REDEMPTION CODES:

 

Expired Call of Duty: Mobiles Codes

These codes are quite old, and are very likely to have expired already, but feel free to try your luck anyway.

CJQRZBZMH9
CJRCZBZV8G
CJLKZBZ6UF
CJHFZBZFF7
CGFJZBZ3QT
CGFKZBZ5GK
CGFLZBZDG7
CGCDZBZCDM
CGPGZBZJAC
CDNKZBZJBC
CIVQZBZMD8
CIVRZBZKD7

 

CIVOZBZX96
CIVPZBZHBV
CIRCZBZQ68
CINUZBZNE6
CIKQZBZJJV
CIKPZBZ3VG
CIQUZBZQJH
CIDEZBZP7R
CIDFZBZHMB
ARPM3LUJ0JF97
170TSIINDQ9UZ
FFPLOJEUFHSI

 

BQIHZBZC4Q
BQIDZBZWCT
CODMC753629219
BNDGZBZFF7
BMRNZBZNKC
BTBUZC4VR
BLMLZCZH88
QVABZA5RI7ZHQ
67VHL8XS2SZ1
BQICZBZ7BM
SX4G73D55RNJ7
3EREQN8HR4KXN

 

CIDHZBZAUE
CIDGZBZWHP
CHUIZBZGR6
CHUHZBZUWR
CIDFZBZHMB
CIDEZBZP7R
CIDJZBZ39X
CIDIZBZ6VS
CHUBZBZA6N
CICPZBZT47
CHUFZBZW5J
CHUJZBZPG5

 

Reverse: 1999 Codes January 2024

 

CHUGZBZDEG
CHUEZBZKHR
CIDDZBZA9A
CHUDZBZ6UF
CHUCZBZATR
CHNDZBZDG8
CHNBZBZSS5
CHNGZBZNNV
CHV0ZBZ86T
CDNIZBZXSD
CHVMZBZHQB
CHNEZBZFTR

 

CHVNZBZHCT
CHNCZBZHUS
BQIHZBZC4Q
SSUXH8S0ELKU
BQIBZBZJSU
STPW4PR86ZRF
BFOBZDUCLOZ6DBT
NSHIW629RU2N85
USU261863H287E8
STPW4PR86ZRF
BFQGZEBKCAZ97FP
BEI25I3Y2BDI7829

 

BFOBZDUCLOZ6DBT
EHEUUE73I63UT6
BJRLZBZDV8
JNQ34TEANEG9R
BVRPZITKAZADS9
RIEJ1572HE51GE
BJMMZCZAQS
BJMMZCZAQS
BMTUZBZXUD
BNGHZBZBTN
BMTPZBZAAN
BMRMZBZESA

 

CIVOZBZX96
CIVPZBZHBV
CIRCZBZQ68
CINUZBZNE6
CIKQZBZJJV
CIKPZBZ3VG
CIQUZBZQJH
CIDEZBZP7R
CIDFZBZHMB
ARPM3LUJ0JF97
170TSIINDQ9UZ
FFPLOJEUFHSI

 

BQIHZBZC4Q
BQIDZBZWCT
CODMC753629219
BNDGZBZFF7
BMRNZBZNKC
BTBUZC4VR
BLMLZCZH88
QVABZA5RI7ZHQ
67VHL8XS2SZ1
BQICZBZ7BM
SX4G73D55RNJ7
3EREQN8HR4KXN

 

BJMMZCZAQS
BQIHZBZC4Q
BQICZBZ7BM
BFNUZILDFZ4JU43
CODMA473366440
BJMMZCZAQS
SSUXH8S0ELKU
BQIBZBZJSU
BPIBZBZ4QX
CODMB846206751
BJMIZCZ9QD
BQIBZBZJSU

BPIBZBZ4QX
BGRBZBZG3K

 

Genshin Impact Codes January 2024

 

This list will be updated as often as we are able to track down more redemption codes from any and all Call of Duty: Mobile sources.

We Analyzed Every Frame of the GTA VI Trailer and Discovered Our Loved Ones Resent Us

Posted on by Ryan Sims

MIAMI – Ever since the release of the Grand Theft Auto VI trailer, games journalists like myself have been working hard to report on every hidden detail and easter egg we can find. I reached out to some of my loved ones to see how they feel about my complete and utter neglect of them for a 90 second video game trailer.

“You were supposed to be home for Christmas,” said my brother, Andrew. “Mom left the casserole in the oven just in case you showed up. I knew you wouldn’t. She went to bed crying. You can’t just neglect your family like this, we’ve done so much for you. You need to grow up and start taking responsibility for your actions. Why did you call me? Call Mom. And please stop sending me screenshots of Lucia with the red sweaty face emoji. I’m married bro.”

My girlfriend, Kendall, was less resentful and more just straight up worried about me.

“Babe, please come home,” she said, audibly holding back tears. “I haven’t heard from you in two weeks. Where are you? Are you hurt? Should I call the police? I tried going to your apartment the other day but the door was locked and you were screaming along to a Tom Petty song. I thought you hated Tom Petty? What’s going on? Why aren’t you saying anything? Please just talk to me, Ryan. You can’t just shut me out like this. I don’t want us to end this way. Please. I love y–”

Thanks to an incessant spamming of emails that now has me on a NSA watchlist, I managed to get in contact with Rockstar themselves, and ask them how I should handle my most cherished relationships deteriorating around me.

“Now you know how we feel,” said Sam Houser, President of Rockstar Games. “I mean, we’re writing the damn thing. I haven’t seen my kids since 2018. They think I’m dead. I’m kinda annoyed at the gravestone they picked out for me. Anyway, even if I had time to talk to them I couldn’t. I might accidentally let slip something about the game. If Take Two finds out I violated my NDA, I’ll end up in the same hospital prison as that hacker kid. Hey, before you go, can I run some 69ing jokes by you real quick?”

At time of press, I’ve been written out of the family will and my girlfriend has moved on to a Polygon.com writer. But it’s just like Petty said, “Love is a long, long road.”

Today’s Wordle Answer 929 And Hints For Thursday, January 4, 2024

Posted on by Michelle Pereira

Wordle can be an unforgiving puzzle sometimes, in which you can often come so close to losing a long streak, and so for your convenience, here are some hints as well as today’s Wordle answer Jan 4.

We present Wordle clues here in a variety of ways to gently help you along, but if you just want the answer straight, spoilers be damned,  then scroll all the way to the bottom to the section titled Wordle Answer Today.

Already Jan 5 at your location? Try our Wordle answer page for that day instead!

 

Definition Hint For Today’s Wordle Answer 929 Thursday, January 4, 2024

Today's Wordle Answer
Wordle Answer Today

Here’s a hint with the meaning of the Wordle answer today in the New York Times

 

An adjective that describes something that is limited, insufficient, or barely enough in quantity, degree, or extent.

 

 

Fifth Letter Hint For The Wordle Answer Today

The fifth letter for today’s Wordle answer is:

 

“T”

 

 

Fourth Letter Hint For The Wordle Answer Today

The fourth letter for today’s Wordle answer is:

 

“N”

 

 

Third Letter Hint For The Wordle Answer Today

The third letter for today’s Wordle answer is:

 

“A”

 

 

Second Letter Hint For The Wordle Answer Today

The second letter for today’s Wordle answer is:

 

“C”

 

 

First Letter Hint For The Wordle Answer Today

The first letter for today’s Wordle answer is:

 

“S”

 

 

Wordle Answer Today

And finally, here is today’s Wordle answer in the New York Times. While this is your last chance to turn back, don’t feel bad about having to look it up.

Sometimes you have just one last chance to solve the puzzle, but three different letters that could viably fit into that last remaining square. At other times the word is so obscure, you just would not have gotten it without having in-depth knowledge about some oddly specific subject.

That’s no reason to lose a streak you have kept going for 188 days straight! So here goes nothing:

3…

2…

1…

Today’s Wordle answer is “SCANT”

 

Wordle Today 930 Answer And Wordle Hint For January 5, 2024

 

Previous Wordle Answers With Their Definitions

Wordle #928 For Wednesday, January 3, 2024

“TWIRL”

The action of rotating or spinning something around its axis or in a circular motion.

Wordle #927 For Tuesday, January 2, 2024

“AGING”

The process of getting older, typically associated with the passage of time.

Wordle #926 For Monday, January 1, 2024

“MURAL”

A large-scale artwork or painting that is created directly on a wall, ceiling, or other permanent surface.

Wordle #925 For Sunday, December 31, 2023

“SALTY”

A taste sensation associated with the presence of salt.

Wordle #924 For Saturday, December 30, 2023

“THREE”

The numerical representation of the quantity 3.

Sonic Issues Public Apology After Doing Sassy Idle Animation While Player Was Having a Medical Emergency

Posted on by Jack H.

GREEN HILL ZONE – Sonic the Hedgehog held a press conference at Green Hill Zone to address an incident involving a player that occurred the week prior.

The player in question, Marcus Waterman (29) was playing Sonic with friends, when suddenly he went into anaphylactic shock. As his friends were attempting to save Marcus, Sonic was seen on screen tapping his foot, checking his watch, and impatiently gesturing toward the screen in a passive aggressive manner. Sonic continued with these animations until Marcus returned from the hospital hours later and turned off the console.

The press conference was held Thursday, with Sonic joined on stage by his partner Amy Rose and his attorney Big the Cat. Sonic read from a prepared statement, “I would like to start by apologizing to Marcus, a temporary lapse in judgment caused me to appear as if I became impatient towards you as your throat began to close from anaphylaxis. I believe myself to be a man of faith and my actions looked like I was not following teachings of our lord and savior Jesus Christ.”

After several minutes of contextless cherry-picked bible quotes, Sonic turned attention to his fans. “I understand some of you are upset and I am sorry that you feel that way. In an attempt to make it up to you, a percentage of all profits from Sonic™ merchandise will go to my newly formed charity Sonic’s Heroes.”

The Sonic’s Heroes website states that the for-profit charity was formed to “do important research into why Epipen prices are so high in the United States.” Sonic seemed optimistic the newly formed charity would make an impact down the road, “By working directly with our corporate partner Pfizer, we believe we can get to the bottom of why Epipen prices are several hundred dollars higher in the US than other countries.”

Sonic then appeared to attempt to go off script, “To be completely frank for a moment, I don’t know why this is one hundred percent my fault. He is the one that ate something he was allergic to.” His microphone was quickly cut before he could continue and his management team announced the end of the press conference.

Sonic was the only person to speak at the press conference with Amy Rose seemingly there for moral support, while Big the Cat was clearly there to slap the ukulele Amy Rose kept trying to play during the apology out of her hands. Hard Drive reached out to Marcus for comment and he declined due to pending litigation.

We were able to learn that the cause of the incident was a chili dog which we believe Sonic may have compelled Marcus to eat, thus making him potentially culpable.

 

“Blowing Into A Video Game Cartridge Can Actually Damage It” And Other Video Game Facts to Annoy People With at a Party

Posted on by Matt Ringler

You’ve been invited to a party of a friend of a friend and you’re worried you might not have anything to talk about. Or maybe you need something to break the ice with new people. Hard Drive has got you covered with these video game facts! Your mileage may vary.

The Origins of the Konami Code

You arrive at the party and notice someone wearing a novelty shirt with the famous “Konami Code” for all to see. You take this opportunity to break the ice.

“Did you know that the Konami Code, sometimes called the Contra Code, actually first appeared in the NES release of the game Gradius? The code was added to the home release of the game because it was found to be too hard during testing.”

You get a half-interested “oh, cool,” response before your fellow party guest informs you they don’t play video games all that much and just thought the shirt looked cool.

Early Model PS1s Are Considered One of the Best CD Players Ever Made

The party starts to get going and you notice some people trying to get a bluetooth speaker connected to their phones. You spot this as the perfect time for your next opener.

“Did you know that the first PS1 systems are considered to be one of the best CD players ever made? Since they have individual analogue audio ports, the first generation of PS1 systems can produce audio that could only be matched by other CD players costing thousands of dollars at the time.”

Right as you wrap up telling this fact, the bluetooth speaker connects, music starts blasting, and your fun fact gets drowned out.

Blowing into a Video Game Cartridge Can Damage It

The party has been going for a while and you’ve been bouncing between groups, pretending to participate in their conversations. Suddenly, the host of the party emerges from a side room with a saving grace in their hand: A box labeled “N64.” You notice them pull out a cartridge, and before it is too late, you blurt out.

“Did you know blowing into a video game cartridge can actually damage it? The moisture from your breath can cause damage to the pin connectors over time. The idea that blowing into a cartridge works is mostly anecdotal.”

You get a confused look from the host, who hasn’t gotten a chance to meet you yet.

The Manual for Super Mario Kart Encourages You to Look at Other Player’s Screen

The cartridge you attempted to save happens to be Mario Kart 64. Your time to shine. You put on a clinic and execute perfectly. After you win, you get accused of looking at your opponents screen. Time to save face.

“Did you know that in the original Super Mario Kart manual, it actually encourages you to look at other player’s screens? It actually says ‘keep an eye on your opponent’s screen’ in the manual.”

The attempt doesn’t work and everyone decides to play a different game.

The Original NBA Jam is Rigged Against the Bulls

Another classic game is selected, this time it’s NBA Jam. You decide to sit this one out, but you notice the two people playing have selected the Bulls and the Pistons. You try to resist saying your next fact, but can’t help it.

“Did you know that NBA Jam is rigged against the Bulls? The creator, Mark Turmell, was a Pistons fan, so he programmed a bias against the Bulls when they played the Pistons. If the game is close, the Bulls will always miss last-second shots.”

The only response you get is a slight nod from the person who selected the Bulls as they switch to the Nicks.

The Dev Team on Dead Space Looked at Pictures of Car Crash Victims when creating the Necromorphs

Your video game facts haven’t really been a success at the party, so you decide to take them in another direction and hit the group with some shock value.

“Did you know the dev team on Dead Space used pictures of car crash victims and scenes of war as reference when creating the Necromorphs? The team did this because they didn’t want the dead bodies in the game to look unrealistic.”

The room goes silent.

The First Shot From An Enemy in Bioshock Will Always Miss

The party is winding down and all eyes are on you. It’s time to recover with one final video game fact.

“Did you know that the first shot from an enemy in Bioshock will always miss? The game was intentionally designed this way to give players a chance to dodge initial attacks from enemies.”

The room remains silent until a single voice breaks through. “Oh, I never knew that. That’s really cool!” Unknown to you, this group of people are huge Bioshock fans. Your awkwardness has been forgotten and your reputation has been saved.

Featured image from wikihow

Todd Howard Seen Personally Responding to Every Starfield Review With Link to Steam Award

Posted on by Ian Guyette

ROCKVILLE, Md. — Employees of Bethesda Game Studios witnessed long-time game director Todd Howard personally responding to every negative review of Starfield, linking the game’s “Most Innovative Gameplay” win at the Steam Awards Tuesday evening.

“I was about to leave for the day when I noticed the soft glow of a monitor coming from Todd’s office,” said Starfield developer Erin Brown. “I thought it was odd that someone might still be in, especially Todd, but then I remembered that Steam announced their game awards this evening and my stomach dropped.

“I was shocked to find out that we won an award for innovative gameplay, but Todd really seemed to be spurred by this news — aroused, even.”

One of Bethesda’s custodial staff, Ed Thompson, witnessed the unusual activity firsthand, having walked in on Howard with his hands moving furiously across an old light-up gaming keyboard.

“I knew Starfield won an award as soon as I walked in — he just started raving at me about ‘losers, deniers, sinners, and fools,’ or something like that with his eyes all bloodshot. I was just trying to get at the wastebasket under his desk since it was filled with way more candy wrappers than usual.

“Mostly I was surprised that Starfield won anything at all, since it was competing with other AAA games that came out this year. Plus, Todd once ate a sandwich with my name on it in the breakroom, muttering ‘This is what they asked for’ over and over. Who does that?”

Howard’s executive assistant, John Paige, offered input on the situation, speaking loudly over the sound of frantic keystrokes coming from Howard’s executive suite.

“He’s been like this forever, really,” said Paige. “I’m sure he’s just overseeing further Starfield development and strategizing our next big release — you know Mr. Howard used to be on the chess team, right? This is nothing you won’t see from any other successful game director. Just ask Phil Spencer, who has been great to work with! Anyway, look over there! A new teaser for the next Elder Scrolls game!”

Disappointed Starfield players were surprised to find that just a single impassioned user had left responses to all of their negative reviews, referring to the somewhat well-known but mostly novel Steam Awards listings.

“I got a notification that someone had just responded to my review of Starfield,” said gamer Tom Slattery, “but what I didn’t expect was that Todd Howard himself would respond to my article personally. I’m touched, frankly, but why couldn’t he have responded to my Skryim review? I loved that game.

“All I said about Starfield was that it was somewhat boring — not a bad game, but not a great game, you know? Like it’s a solid 7 out of 10, with room for improvement. I didn’t expect Todd to berate me and my family above a link to a Google Street View of my house. He also added a link to the ‘Most Innovative Gameplay’ award on Steam, which I suppose could mean something to someone.”

At the time of publication, Howard was reportedly seen red-faced and clenching his jaw, painting the words “I GOT THE LAST LAUGH” on his street-facing office windows.

This Article Wins Labor of Love Award

Posted on by Matt Fresh

It is with great honor that I humbly accept the Labor of Love Award for this article! 

I worked extraordinarily hard on it and to be recognized for my work is just incredible!

This article is really my life’s work in a way. Every article I’ve ever written for Hard Drive was preparing me for this one. That the voters chose this article for this award really means the world to me.

There’s so many people I want to thank. First of all I want to thank my parents, they’ve never believed in me or my dream to be funny for money but they put up with me anyway. Perhaps now they will be proud.

I also want to thank all the various other Matts who write for Hard Drive for forcing me to really bring my A game to get noticed by our overlords.

Most importantly I want to thank Tom Cruise for inspiring me to always give 110% in everything I do. I know you’re reading this Tom and I hope you know I love you and your movies. Now that I’m an award winner I hope you’ll consider me to write your next project.

To everyone who voted for this article just know that I wrote it for you. You are the spark that gives way to my flame, you are the wings beneath my wind, you are the light on the dark side of me. To everyone who voted for something stupid like Red Dead Redemption 2 I hope you know that I’m not mad, just disappointed.

I pledge to continue writing articles just like this one. Not because I have to but because I want the continued admiration that this Labor of Love Award has granted me. Thank you gamers and thank you reformed orthodox rabbi Bill Clinton!

Animus Update Forces Advertisements In Generational Memories

Posted on by HG Punk

MONTREAL – Users of the Animus, the groundbreaking machine made by Abstergo Industries that lets one see into genealogical memories, have recently been reporting visions sourced from colorful mascots rather than their ancestors.

“I was experiencing life as an assassin in 16th century Italy, and suddenly I woke up in McDonaldsland,” recounted Scott Miller, a frustrated Animus user. “I was stuck staring at a plate of Chicken McNuggets for nearly an hour, and everytime I tried to look away I would get desynchronized.

“Who are they trying to fool by telling me that Grimace was one of my ancestors?,” continued Miller. “I got so fed up with the whole thing that I tried to kill the Hamburglar just to feel something. If they don’t fix this, my future children will use their Animus to relive me getting a refund.”

The backlash against commercials in customers’ consciousness has spurred a response from Melanie Lemay, who currently serves as Chief Creative Officer at Abstergo.

“We were taking a leap of faith into personalized sponsors but didn’t quite stick the landing,” read a statement from Lemay. “The data on memories was accidentally mixed up with what products our users are genetically predisposed to enjoy.

“While these ads may feel like being stabbed out of nowhere, we do recommend that anyone upset go out and eat a delicious Big Mac. If anyone using the Animus experienced any advertisements for heart disease pills, they should likely heed that as soon as possible.”

Abraham Berger, a templar who lived over three hundred years ago, had a lot to say via the Animus in between visions of delicious eats.

“Their existence is the bane of our goals, and we’ve been working for centuries to extinguish them for good,” declared the templar. ”I could not tell you how many of my friends they’ve killed in our quest for a new world order.

“Always hiding in those forsaken bushes, carrying their blades,” Berger continued until we explained that we were talking about advertisements and not assassins. ”My apologies, I can’t say I know what an advertisement is.”

Amidst the backlash, Abstergo has promised that it will work on removing these advertisements from future synchronizations. Though it seems that not everyone has been displeased with the new memories. One such customer who has been using the animus quite a lot since the update had this to say:

“Seeing the memories of the world through your ancestors eyes is just like a delicious bowl of Frosted Flakes, they’re Grrrrrrrreat!”

Cursed VHS Tape Finally Getting Blu-Ray Release Via Criterion

Posted on by Gabe Porter

New York, N.Y. – Criterion has announced they are finally bringing a long awaited Cursed VHS Tape to modern media formats. This comes as great news to all the demons and cursed souls who worked on it.

“We’re so happy to be able to give this such a wide release,” black-eyed criterion representative John Stein said, “It was a herculean task finding the original prints, but I think viewers will notice the incredible upgrade.

“Of course, we lost around 20 employees while we were doing the transfer, and a few more keep complaining about how they keep seeing the face of Lucifer every time they close their eyes, but that’s the price you pay for restoring cinema.”

The demonic director of the film, Karblox The Devourer, is glad more people can see their hard work after all this time.

“You know, it was just all the rage back in the day,” Karblox said, “That creepy girl from The Ring was doing it, Slender Man was really into it, so I figured it was good enough for me. It was really fun to put together, I remember directing all of the damned souls I trapped in the magnetic tape like it was yesterday.

“I’m glad that people are still interested in my old work, with people now-a-days you gotta go through all these hoops with complicated CGI and casting big stars. You’ll never have the freedom we had back then to cast no-name rakshasas in big budget brainwashing tapes.”

Fans of old cinema as well as weak minded fools all over the world are excited to finally see the footage in 4k resolution.

“I’ve had this thing on my watchlist forever,” Gil Ableson said, “But do you know how hard it is to find one of the original tapes? I’ve spent hours in my local forest and come back with nothing but mosquito bites and a cool stick I found.

“Now that it’s coming to Blu-Ray, I’ll finally be able to curse myself and die a horrific death! Now that’s what every true cinefile pines for! I just hope I’m able to write a funny Letterboxd review before I die.”

The Hard Drive’s resident film critic’s review of the film will be released as soon as we figure out how to extract his soul from the disc.