Brody R Thompson, Author at Hard Drive

A Harrowing Day in History: Looking Back at Mario & Sonic at the Munich 1972 Olympic Games

Posted on January 4, 2023 by Hard Drive Staff

Originally known as the “Games of Peace and Joy,” the 1972 Summer Olympics in Munich, Germany, tragically turned into a high-stakes game of terror when 11 Mushroom Kingdom athletes were taken hostage by terrorists from Planet Mobius. 50 years later, we look back at how the most shocking two-day event in international sports competition history transpired.

Mushroom Broadcasting Company provided the coverage for 1972 Games. Lakitu of MBC Sports interrupted the Dream Racing broadcast to report that terrorists had climbed the 6-foot wire fence protecting the Olympic Village and entered the headquarters of Team Sonic.

“One athlete was shot immediately, Silver the Hedgehog,” Lakitu announced on air. “They’re holding 14 other hostages. The latest word is that another man has been killed.”

Two more members of Team Sonic were executed by members of the Black September Toad Liberation Organization, a militant group that claimed responsibility for previously assassinating Jordanian Prime Minister Wasfi Tal. The assailants then announced their demands.

“We demand the swift and immediate release of 200 Toads held hostage in various Mushroom Kingdom prisons. We also demand the removal of Princess Peach as the Head of State before she participates in 100m Hurdles later this afternoon.”

The failure of a rescue attempt by West German officials resulted in the death of all hostages, although 5 of the 8 terrorists were also killed. The incident stained the legacy of the Olympic Games for decades to come, with many officials and athletes lamenting the impact of the harrowing events to this day.

“Mama Mia,” said an anonymous member of the International Olympic Committee and former athlete who participated in the Games that year. “This is-a not what the Games are about. I a-understand the historical relations between-a the Mushroom Kingdom and Planet Mobius are-a complex and difficult, but there has-a never been a need for such bloodshed. Wahoo! At the end of the day, The International Olympic Committee just-a wants to celebrate the world’s greatest runners, swimmers, and Dream Table Tennis players. Let’s-a-go!”

The sporting world will never forget the summer events of 1972, hoping to minimize political injustice on the global sporting stage for years to come. At the time of writing, we conclude our coverage of the 2022 Mario Strikers World Cup in Qatar.

New Gritty Action Movie Reimagines Genre by Not Casting Michelle Rodriguez

Posted on January 4, 2023 by Jeremy Kaplowitz

LOS ANGELES — A new movie about a group of marines in space battling aliens has reinvented the genre by not casting actress Michelle Rodriguez.

“We really wanted to do something different with Aperture Rising, and the way we came up with was to remove the key feature that all movies in this genre are centered around: casting Michelle Rodriguez as a gruff space marine who dies 50 minutes into the movie,” said director Jimmy Conner. “It was scary even trying to write the script with that in mind — what does that kind of movie even look like? Would it be too avant-garde for audiences? What would Michelle Rodriguez do with the free time? These are questions we’ve hopefully answered with our film, but even now, I can’t say for sure.”

“And don’t get me wrong,” he added. “We’re still gonna have a tough, white-tanktop-wearing woman space marine in the movie. She’s just played by someone other than Michelle Rodriguez. Let’s not get crazy here! Viewers still need to have a somewhat more masculine woman character who is less important than a somewhat more feminine woman character, so they know who the love interest is. Or else, what are we even doing?”

Despite the exciting new venture, viewers at early test screenings of the film reportedly found it confusing.

“I don’t understand,” said one viewer. “Where was Michelle Rodriguez?”

I found it difficult to follow the plot. There were a lot of aliens and shooting and stuff like that,” said another viewer. “Maybe if there was a cool, tough character in the film — a woman, maybe — who kind of talked in a New York accent, and said not really jokes, but like, funny little complaints about what was going on, I’d have something to latch onto.”

“I thought Michelle Rodriguez was good in the film. I like her,” said a third viewer. “She wasn’t in it? Oh. Well I fell asleep for a little bit, so maybe that was part of my dream.”

At press time, panicked producers who financed Aperture Rising had hired a VFX team to hastily CGI Michelle Rodriguez into the film before its release date in three weeks.

Destiny 2 Season of the Seraph Moon Resonance Amp Locations

Posted on January 4, 2023 by Richard Tammaro

Destiny 2’s Season of the Seraph features plenty of activities for players to grind and collectibles to find. One of those collectible types are Resonance Amps. These collectibles require some extra steps to be completed before players can even interact with them. So, are all of the Moon Resonance Amp locations in Destiny 2’s Season of the Seraph.

Looking for other Resonance Amps? Check out our guide on the Europa Resonance Amp Locations.

Destiny 2 Season of the Seraph: All Moon Resonance Amp Locations

Luna.Sanctuary.Stage.Backdrop

This Warmind Node is found below the platform Eris Morn stands on in Sanctuary. Simply head behind her and jump down to collect this node.

Luna.Archer.Crevasse.Crash – Moon Resonance Amp Locations

This Warmind Node can be found along the road in Archer’s Line. Follow the road northwest and stop at the jump over the crevasse. Look down and to the right from the jump to find a number of platforms to jump down. The node is located on the second platform.

Moon Resonance Amps: Luna.Archer.Dome.Catwalk

This Warmind Node is found in a dome structure in the southeast corner of Archer’s Line. Head inside the structure and jump up to the second level to find this node.

Luna.Hellmouth.Outcropping.Alcove

This Warmind Node is found at the back of a small cave in Hellmouth. Hive enemies do spawn from here, so clear the area then head in for your node.

Luna.Sorrows.Altars.Recess – Moon Resonance Amp Locations

This Warmind Node is found in a cave under the Altars in Sorrow’s Harbor. Hive enemies spawn all over this area, so clear them out first if they are giving you any issue. Then enter the cave and continue all the way to the end to find this node.

Luna.Anchor.Tower.Rotunda

This Warmind Node is found in a circular structure near the center of Anchor of Light. Head inside and find the node near the doorway, next to some boxes.

NBA 2K23 MyTeam Guide: How to Get Moments Donovan Mitchell

Posted on January 4, 2023 by Michael Czar

After one of the highest-scoring games in recent NBA history, the 2K team has released a Moments Galaxy Opal 97-rated Donovan Mitchell card for free in MyTeam. He does require some work to get, so here are the requirements to get a free Galaxy Opal Donovan Mitchell and some tips to get him quickly. The quick rundown is that players need to recreate the stats he put up in that overtime win over the Chicago Bulls on January 2nd, 2023 with an NBA 2K23 Donovan Mitchell card of their own.

NBA 2K23: How to get a free 97 Overall Donovan Mitchell

To start, like any Moments card in MyTeam, there are some accomplishments you need to do in-game to get this special card. Like other Moments cards in the game, not only do you need to hit all accomplishments but with a version of the star. For example, with the Moments 96-rated Pink Diamond Joel Embiid card, you needed to hit all his accomplishments with a version of Embiid to complete them.

Here are the challenges you need to complete to earn a 97-rated Donovan Mitchell card in MyTeam.

Score 71 points in a single game with Donovan Mitchell
Get 11 assists in a single game with Donovan Mitchell
Get 8 rebounds in a single game with Donovan Mitchell
Score 24 points in the paint in a single game with Donovan Mitchell
Score 7 three-pointers and shoot 46% or better with three-pointers in a single game with Donovan Mitchell
Score 6 free throws and shoot 80% or better for free throw percentage in a single game with Donovan Mitchell
Play 49 minutes with any Donovan Mitchell over multiple games

The MyTeam agenda for Moments Galaxy Opal Donovan Mitchell.

Each one of these challenges has a small reward, from trophies for the Trophy Case reward collection to in-game badges. But, after completing them all, you will have your free Galaxy Opal card.

How to Get Moments Donovan Mitchell Fast

Out of all the possible ways to complete these requirements for Donovan Mitchell, there is a specific group of challenges in-game to help complete this (as well as any other) set of requirements for cards or other unlockables in MyTeam.

The Basketball Fundamentals section in Challenges for MyTeam.

The ‘Basketball Fundamentals’ section has its challenges on Semi-Pro difficulty, the second-lowest difficulty for offline gameplay. Each subsection has specific requirements to complete the game, from five dunks to five three-pointers as a team. Plus, the opposition consists of the base cards of teams from across the league. So, it isn’t hard to fit Mitchell in your team and just rain fire on your opponents to hit and soar past the stats he hit in real life.

Now, there are two available Donovan Mitchell cards outside of this 97-rated one to use. The first is a Takeover Reward card from Season 1, a limited-time 93-rated Diamond card. For fans who don’t have that card, the easiest way is to get the base 83-rated version of Mitchell from the Token Rewards section. Simply collect tokens from MyTeam gameplay and redeem 15 of them for a Cavaliers starter card and choose Mitchell.

How to get Donovan Mitchell in NBA 2K23. — The Token Market in NBA 2K23 MyTeam.

Then, simply try and get all the requirements completed with Mitchell over multiple games. Once that is done, you have a free Galaxy Opal shooting guard for your roster on 2K23 MyTeam. However, keep in mind, as all Moments cards are, this is a limited-time card. Players only have until January 6th, 2023 at approximately 11 A.M. EST to unlock this free 97-rated card, so start the grind soon!

GTA Online Snow Guide: When Will The Snow End in GTA Online?

Posted on January 4, 2023 by Tarun Sayal

The addition of Snow was one of the most significant changes in the GTA Online Winter update. Snow appears in the game during winter, typically lasting from December to February. However, it seems that snow may melt a bit early this year. As the winter season comes to an end and the spring season approaches, the snow will begin to melt and eventually disappear from the game world. With that said, here’s everything you need to know about when snow will end in GTA Online.

When Will Snow Stop in GTA Online?

According to the Rockstar Newswire, Snow will leave GTA Online’s world on January 12, 2023. As a result, all the activities, quests, and challenges related to the winter event will conclude once the snow sheet melts.

In an official announcement, Rockstar stated the following:

“The eggnog may have soured, but the rare Los Santos snowfall and holiday-themed festivities are still going strong in Southern San Andreas. Through January 11: take out The Gooch stalking the streets and receive The Gooch Mask; Hear those sleigh bells ring and destroy all 25 Snowmen collectibles to earn an extra GTA$125K and The Snowman outfit; Get in the middle of the action atop Weazel Plaza and neutralize your targets to get your hands on the new WM 29 Pistol; Establishing peace on the rooftop will also earn you the Season’s Greetings skin for the Pistol Mk II.”

So if you haven’t completed winter challenges and activities like Weazel Plaza Shootout, and destroy 25 snowmen, then it’s your last chance to snag plenty of cash and a pretty goofy-looking snowman costume until January 11, when the snow will end in GTA Online.

After that, Rockstar will drop another weekly update, which is definitely going to be a massive one for the GTA Online community. Until then, though, enjoy the snow while it lasts!

Guy With Anime Profile Picture Actually Looks Like That

Posted on January 4, 2023 by Matt Bieker

WILMINGTON, Del. — A local Twitter user with the username “RyukyuBlade” has received continuous ridicule for the anime character featured in his profile picture, even though the character looks exactly like him in real life.

“Every time I post, all I get are responses like ‘anime PFP detected’ or people calling me ‘weeaboo trash.’ These people don’t understand,” said RyukyuBlade, after getting roasted in the comments of a post about the best Netflix movies of 2022. “This character was the first time I saw myself represented in pop culture. He has my same spiky, neon-orange hair, the same steel eye patch in the shape of an upside-down cross, and he even carries around an 8-foot-long sword like I do. I mean, sure, his floor-length cloak is black, and mine’s more of like a dark green. But still, it’s pretty close!”

Another poster under the username “Ultimate_Rizzz69” seemed to take a special interest in ridiculing the young man’s seeming obsession with the Japanese media form.

“I’ve seen him commenting on shit before and it’s like, grow the fuck up bro. No one cares about your favorite anime,” said Ultimate_Rizzz69. “We all know you want to have, like, magical powers or whatever and you probably run around calling people ‘senpai’ and unleashing your ‘special move.’ It’s just so lame. That’s why having an anime PFP is the fastest way to get your opinion ignored by normal people.”

RykyuBlade, however, insisted that his appreciation of the anime character wasn’t indicative of his media tastes as a whole.

“Honestly, I’m kind of just a casual anime fan. Some of them are a little too ‘out-there’ for me, you know?” said RyukyuBlade from the mountaintop where he lives and trains. “But when I watched this show in high school and they revealed he also has a pet dragon that houses the soul of his dead girlfriend, I teared up a little. It’s just nice to see characters you can relate to.”

At press time, RyukyuBlade had grown so frustrated with the attacks he was receiving online that he accidentally incinerated his phone with an energy blast from the snake tattoo on the palm of his hand.

Destiny 2 Season of the Seraph Europa Resonance Amp Locations

Posted on January 4, 2023 by Richard Tammaro

Destiny 2’s Season of the Seraph features plenty of activities for players to grind and collectibles to find. One of those collectible types are Resonance Amps. These collectibles require some extra steps to be completed before players can even interact with them. So, here is how to collect Resonance Amps and the Europa Resonance Amp locations in Destiny 2’s Season of the Seraph.

How to Unlock and Use Resonate Stems

Resonate Stems are a type of currency that are used to access Warmind Nodes. During the Season of the Seraph, Resonate Stems are earned from every activity a player completes. These items will be added into your inventory under a consumable named Resonance Amp. Once a player has collected 4 Resonance Stems they can interact with the Resonance Amp in their inventory to create an Override Code, consuming the Resonate Stems. Each Override Code corresponds to a specific Warmind Node location and is generated randomly. Players can not interact with Warmind Nodes they find unless they have generated the Override Code specific to that node.

Destiny 2 Season of the Seraph: All Europa Resonance Amp Locations

NOTE: Warmind Nodes are only found on Europa, Moon, and in the Operation: Seraph’s Shield Exotic Mission. Map images are included when possible.

Europa.Beyond.Cliff.Landing

This Warmind Node is found at the very edge of the cliff in the Beyond section of Europa. Simply run up to it and interact to collect it.

Europa.Crossing.Outpost.Wall Resonance Amp Location

This Warmind Node can be found just outside of Variks’ Outpost in Charon’s Crossing. After heading out the front door look for a broken metal platform. The node is on the ledge just below this broken platform.

Europa.Ridge.Road.Ledge

This Warmind Node is found along the road between Charon’s Crossing and Cadmus Ridge. Heading up the road from Charon’s Crossing the node can be found on a ledge to the left just before entering Cadmus Ridge.

Resonance Amp Location: Europa.Abyss.Fissure.Construct

This Warmind Node is found nestled between some broken ice and the main structure in Absterion Abyss. Look around the edge of the structure to find a small opening in the ice near the Concealed Void Lost Sector.

Europa.Eventide.Cliff.Refuge

This Warmind Node is found in a cave along the edge of Eventide Ruins. Look for an opening in the snow around the eastern edge and head down into a small cave. The node is the only thing in this cave.

Europa.Eventide.Dome.Catwalk – Resonance Amp Location

This Warmind Node is found west of the main structure in Eventide Ruins. You should find a small dome structure in this area. Head inside and up the central catwalk to find this node.

New Study Suggests 60% of Car Accidents Caused by Drivers Trying to Skip Podcast Ad Break

Posted on January 3, 2023 by CJ Hernandez

WASHINGTON — A groundbreaking new study confirmed that over half of all automobile accidents are caused by drivers trying to skip a commercial break in a podcast they’re listening to.

“We knew it was a problem, but we had no idea it was this bad,” said Dr. Ramon Riveria, the scientist that led the study. “People will readily risk their safety and wellbeing at the prospect of enduring just 30 seconds of their favorite broadcasters talking about meal prepping services or vitamins or whatever else. And these are just regular ad reads I’m talking about. If a show cuts to a full blown produced commercial, we’ve discovered that a lot of drivers are liable to just jerk the wheel into a tree or whatever’s around.”

Podcasters were shocked to hear about the study’s findings.

“I get that no one likes advertisements,” said Joseph Greene, a co-host of the You Call That Lunch!? podcast. “But it really does help keep our show going, and we try to make them as inoffensive as possible. Just a quick little ad read and we’re on our way. I mean, we accept ads as a part of TV shows and internet videos, why are people getting into high speed accidents on the freeway because they can’t handle an ad in a podcast?”

As of press time, the study confirmed that a majority of the other 40% of car crashes are a result of the popular “crash your car,” trend that’s currently sweeping TikTok.

Princess Peach Defends Lava Tile Installations Meant to Discourage Loitering

Posted on January 3, 2023 by Aaron Weerasinghe

MUSHROOM KINGDOM — Princess Peach continues to defend the controversial installation of lava tiles around the Mushroom Kingdom intended to deter loitering, sources have confirmed.

“I understand that using lava seems a little harsh,” said the Princess, addressing villagers from her castle earlier today. “But it’s meant to deter, not injure. Maybe you should think of it as tough love. Have you ever really paid attention to a Goomba or a Koopa Troopa? They will pace for hours if left to their own devices, and frankly, it’s a harmful element to our tourism industry.”

While some supported putting lava all over the place, others have claimed it is merely the latest act of violence against the Mushroom Kingdom’s working class.

“These [Goombas and Koopa Troopas] have nowhere to go and we’re punishing them for it,” cried a local villager that was at the gathering outside of Peach’s castle . “ I mean, lava, really?! Do you think Chargin’ Chuck wants to hang out in the same spot all day? No, he’d love to still have a football stadium, but the only sports this snobby kingdom cares about anymore are Golf and Tennis. Hoity toity bullshit for a bunch of spoiled elites. This kingdom turned its back on the athletes, plumbers, and uh, treasure trackers that made this place what it was a long time ago. It’s really too bad.”

Others have defended the act, claiming the use of lava isn’t as severe as it seems.

“I get it, it sounds pretty hardcore and people are upset,” said Dave, a Goomba in town that has nothing but good things to say about the ruling class. “But it also keeps the village warm at night, so that’s actually kind of nice. Also, there’s lava all over the place out here. Have you ever been inside of Bowser’s Castle? You’ll think I’m lying, but lava comes out of the freakin’ pipes over there. So there’s a couple lava puddles here and there, big whoop. Most of us will be dead in a few days anyway.”

As of press time, Princess Peach also introduced her newest Director of Public Safety, a man in a cloud simply known as Lakitu.

BREAKING: Republicans Have Elected Mohg, Lord of Blood as Speaker of the House

Posted on January 3, 2023 by Andy Holt

WASHINGTON — After congressman Kevin McCarthy lost the first vote for Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, the Republican Party united around a consensus candidate: the Omen demigod Mohg, Lord of Blood.

“We just feel that an establishment guy like McCarthy doesn’t reflect the future of the Republican Party, whereas Mohg is exactly what we’re looking for,” said Rep. Matt Gaetz of Florida. “Nobody combines so many different skillsets that we value: vomiting accursed blood, for one, but also torturing those who stand in the way of his power — that’s a huge one, too.”

Even previous supporters of McCarthy came on board, once they learned that Mohg stood for all the same things.

“I wasn’t sure at first, but then I learned that Mohg is committed to maintaining American values, protecting religious freedoms, saving unborn babies from the Democrats’ sick pro-abortion agenda, and embracing accursed Omen blood to be able to wield bloodflame magic,” said Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia. “What else could we ask for?”

Despite Mohg’s extreme stances, moderate Republicans agreed to support him as Speaker, citing their shared fiscal agenda.

“Mohg is no saint, and certainly I disagree with him in some key areas. For instance, I don’t think we should harvest human beings en masse, using their blood to resurrect Mohg’s half-brother Miquella. It’s just not smart policy,” said moderate Republican congressman Josh Gottheimer. “But hey, as long as we cut Medicaid, I’m willing to get on board.”

At press time, Democratic minority leader Hakeem Jeffries had just read out a statement condemning the election of Mohg.

“Welp, that sucks,” said Jeffries, in part. “Not really much we can do about it, though. Just sucks. Damn.”