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BREAKING: My Mom Said I Have to Get Off, Sorry Guys

HOUSTON – Disappointing news is sweeping the city of Houston after 8-year-old Brian Thomas had to leave his PlayStation party under his mother’s commands. His friends were left betrayed and alone as his online status switched to offline.

“We were having a great time playing Fall Guys until I heard a scream in the background that I immediately recognized as Mrs. Thomas. Brian was silent for a few seconds before telling us he had to go to bed and leaving the game,” 9-year-old Eddie said. “It’s tragic that our night had to end like this, and it still bothers me today.”

Brian is hurt the most by this sudden announcement. He had this to say about the abrupt announcement of his departure:

“This is unfair. I work 8 hours a day at school and then do homework. Combine that with eating and showering, and I have no time throughout the day to unwind,” Brian continued. “People think the 2nd grade is easy, but try doing it with an 8 pm bedtime. This is textbook injustice, and I won’t stand for it any longer.”

Not everyone is standing by Brian, however. Many Houston parents are rallying behind his mother and are speaking up against young gamers playing past their bedtime.

“I just think it would be nice if our child didn’t have to loudly announce that he died in Fortnite at 3 am every night,” said one Houston resident. “I stand by his mother, and we need to limit the screen time our children use. I would really prefer to watch The Wire in peace without hearing muffled slurs throughout the house.”

Tensions are steadily rising in the wake of Brian’s sudden departure. This incident is inciting mass conflict between children and their families as they try to find the right balance between recreational activities and a normal, healthy routine.

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