CHICAGO — Tyson Smith, a self-described Final Fantasy 7 fanatic has been activated upon hearing someone proclaim Tactics as their favorite Final Fantasy game, sources close to Smith have confirmed.
“We were all having a nice friendly discussion about the games we were looking forward to. Mark said he was excited to play the Final Fantasy Tactics remaster since it’s his favorite Final Fantasy and Tyson just went ballistic,” said Smith’s friend Nicholas. “He started ranting and raving about how Mark wasn’t a real Final Fantasy fan and that Tactics was basically a spin-off and doesn’t count. Then he ended up on a tangent about how the world was doomed to destruction and only him and other Final Fantasy 7 fans would be left standing.”
Smith stated that hearing someone declare an entry other 7 as their favorite gave him the clarity to know what he must do.
“It had never even occurred to me before that there could be people out there with such incorrect opinions. I had heard of such things but assumed it was only internet bots since everyone with a brain knows 7 is the best Final Fantasy no contest. But now I know we have a lot of educating to do in the Final Fantasy community. We need to eradicate these fake fans, cull the weak while only the strong survive. The Clouds and the Sephiroths will prevail.”
Other members of the Final Fantasy fandom are not shocked to hear of Smith’s activation.
“Oh we know all about him. He gets triggered all the time in the subreddit,” said r/FinalFantasy mod MoogleMan. “Any time there’s a topic that praises literally any entry that isn’t 7 or one of the spin-offs of 7 he gets really upset and harasses people. I’m talking like hundreds of replies. Dude crashes out any time someone says 7 isn’t the greatest game ever made. We’re really ashamed of him, honestly, he makes the rest of us look bad.”
At press time, Smith was reportedly seen outside of a Gamestop in full Sephiroth cosplay harassing anyone purchasing Final Fantasy Tactics: The Ivalice Chronicles
