September 23, 2018 Kevin Feige Confirms Defeating Thanos Will Require Weird 10-Minute Scene in China Kevin Feige Confirms Defeating Thanos Will Require Weird 10-Minute Scene in China BURBANK, Calif. — In a press conference this morning, Marvel Studios President Kevin Feige confirmed rumors that the sequel to Avengers: Infinity War will contain…
September 20, 2018 MISSING: Six Teenagers Who Disappeared Right Before the Power Rangers Showed Up MISSING: Six Teenagers Who Disappeared Right Before the Power Rangers Showed Up ANGEL GROVE, Calif. — Police are currently on the lookout for a group of six teenagers with attitude that went missing right before the unrelated…
September 12, 2018 5 Scott Pilgrim Quotes That Nice Boy Over There Will Use to Justify Abusing You 5 Scott Pilgrim Quotes That Nice Boy Over There Will Use to Justify Abusing You Do you love comic books? Here are the top five Scott Pilgrim quotes you can expect that unassuming “male feminist” rocking a Mac DeMarco shirt…
September 4, 2018 New Tom Clancy Novel About a Friggin Gun That Became President New Tom Clancy Novel About a Friggin Gun That Became President BALTIMORE — Sources report that the newest novel in the Jack Ryan series originally created by Tom Clancy before his death is about a gun…
August 28, 2018 Time For Redemption: Louis CK to Star in Upcoming ‘Leisure Suit Larry’ Movie Time For Redemption: Louis CK to Star in Upcoming ‘Leisure Suit Larry’ Movie NEW YORK — After a surprise appearance at the Comedy Cellar on Monday night, Louis CK has continued his comeback tour by announcing that he…
August 27, 2018 Kevin Smith Reveals Shocking Transformation Into Poorly Dressed Thin Man Kevin Smith Reveals Shocking Transformation Into Poorly Dressed Thin Man LOS ANGELES — Cult filmmaker Kevin Smith posted several pictures on his Twitter account yesterday that revealed he has lost fifty pounds and retained his…
August 22, 2018 Scarlett Johansson Cast as First Black James Bond Scarlett Johansson Cast as First Black James Bond LOS ANGELES — MGM Studios announced today that Scarlett Johansson has been cast to play the first black James Bond, taking a groundbreaking new direction…
August 18, 2018 New Study Into Hogwarts House-Sorting Practices Reveals Stark Racial Bias New Study Into Hogwarts House-Sorting Practices Reveals Stark Racial Bias SCOTLAND — A new study into the decision-making involved in sorting Hogwarts students into housing, which is done by a committee of one sentient hat,…
August 15, 2018 Breaking: You Just Lost The Game Breaking: You Just Lost The Game NEW YORK — New reports are coming in that reveal that you, as a result of reading this very article about local resident Kate Sanford…
