May 12, 2022 So-Called “Hero” of Time Places Bomb in Villager’s Home So-Called “Hero” of Time Places Bomb in Villager’s Home ORDON VILLAGE — The young boy many villagers have proclaimed to be the chosen one that would slay Ganondorf and restore peace to Hyrule has…
May 3, 2022 Report: Standing 40 Feet Away From Enemy as Good as Hiding Report: Standing 40 Feet Away From Enemy as Good as Hiding WASHINGTON — A bizarre new report released today states that standing a good 40 or so feet away from somebody is just as elusive as…
April 26, 2022 Star Wars Hotel Worker Who Broke Character Fed to Employee Dressed as Rancor in Basement Star Wars Hotel Worker Who Broke Character Fed to Employee Dressed as Rancor in Basement BAY LAKE, Fla. ー Guests aboard Disney’s Star Wars themed Galactic Starcruiser hotel witnessed an unscripted moment of drama when a cast member portraying a…
March 27, 2022 Nintendo Announces New Daily Fee to Keep Your Pokémon Alive Nintendo Announces New Daily Fee to Keep Your Pokémon Alive KYOTO, Japan — In order to remain competitive in the games-as-service era, Nintendo announced today that players will need to pay a new daily fee…
March 20, 2022 Long-Distance Couple Changes Zoom Background to Seedy Motel to Spice Things Up Long-Distance Couple Changes Zoom Background to Seedy Motel to Spice Things Up SAN DIEGO ー Struggling to keep the flames of their long-distance relationship alive, Tasha Rice, 33, and Mark Kolar, 32, decided to add a spicy…
March 15, 2022 60 Chickens Accuse Gonzo of Creating Toxic Work Environment on Muppet Show 60 Chickens Accuse Gonzo of Creating Toxic Work Environment on Muppet Show LOS ANGELES 一 A flock of 60 chickens who work on the The Muppet Show have come forward to accuse Gonzo, the show’s eccentric stuntman,…
March 9, 2022 Yakuza Boss Would Feel More Comfortable Discussing This Shirtless on Rooftop Yakuza Boss Would Feel More Comfortable Discussing This Shirtless on Rooftop KAMUROCHO 一 After battling his way to the top offices of the Millenium Tower, an on-again, off-again yakuza chairman reportedly came face-to-face with the boss…
February 23, 2022 Call of Duty Changes Release Date to Avoid Competing With World War 3 Call of Duty Changes Release Date to Avoid Competing With World War 3 SANTA MONICA, Calif. — Activision Blizzard Inc. announced that it is bumping the release date of the next installment of the Call of Duty franchise,…
February 20, 2022 Indoor Kid Yearns for Pre-Covid Times When Parents Would Leave House Indoor Kid Yearns for Pre-Covid Times When Parents Would Leave House PITTSBURGH — 11-year-old indoor kid Tyler Zbrzeski reportedly wishes for the days before COVID-19 forced his gadabout parents to stay home, shattering his routine and…
