Shigeru Miyamoto Delays Orgasm for Quality Purposes
KYOTO, Japan — Shigeru Miyamoto announced today that in order to make sure he lives up to his highest standards,…
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JD Lowe
7 stories found
CDC Warns Americans Against Touching Mario’s Face In ‘Super Mario 64’
ATLANTA — The Center for Disease Control and Prevention held a press conference today explaining in detail the health risks…
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Boss Catches Employee in Idle Animation for Fifth Time This Week
KALAMAZOO, Mich. — Employees at a local marketing agency have confirmed that IT support technician Sye Monteleone was given his…
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Exhausted Parents Admit Newborn Didn’t Really Get Good Until Season 4
COLONIAL HEIGHTS, Va. — Parents Pat and Misty Santohir reportedly told friends that, while they did not regret having their…
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Hundreds Bonded in Power of Friendship Reactor Meltdown
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — A calibration error led to the devastating meltdown of a local Power of Friendship Reactor this morning…
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Corruption of PS2 Memory Card Not Unlike Burning of the Library of Alexandria
AKRON, Ohio — Local gamer Scott Landis’s languish was felt throughout the apartment upon his discovery that his PlayStation 2…
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Jackbox Party Pack 6 to Include New Game ‘Just Draw a Penis‘
CHICAGO — Jackbox Games revealed that “Just Draw a Penis” will be one of five new games that will be…
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