TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Famously unremarkable politician and former presidential nominee Jeb Bush began his new Twitch stream tonight in an unprecedented failure, debuting the same evening as Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s record breaking stream of the hit game Among Us, which featured fellow politicians and streaming celebrities.
“Well this isn’t going at all how I’d planned,” said Bush, several minutes into his own abysmal game of Among Us with various Republican politicians. “Let’s just play the game, Jeb. It’s fun. It’s video games. I guess uh… Scott Walker is pretty sus. I didn’t… I didn’t see him do the, uh… garbage… shit, this is really, really sad. Even for me, this sucks.”
“Please sub,” Bush said to conclude his stream, which had dwindled to three viewers.
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