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Overwhelmed Shelter Labels Raichu as “Senior Pikachu” to Increase Odds of Adoption

SLATEPORT CITY — A local Pokémon shelter has listed a Raichu as a “Senior Pikachu” in the hope that it might entice a trainer to adopt it, sources at the shelter have confirmed.

“All of our cages are full, and no one comes in looking for a boring old Raichu,” said Amy Roberts, the shelter’s director. “We’ve tried everything to entice someone to adopt him. We dressed him in a Focus Sash for pictures. We used a TM to teach him Hyper Beam. We even trained him to stand on his tail so he’d look like an Alolan Raichu. No one wanted him.”

Alex Gardner, a trainer who had recently visited the shelter, said that the new label hadn’t affected their decision about adopting the Pokémon.

“It’s a pretty transparent gimmick,” said Gardner, who was scrolling through their PC boxes and releasing Pokémon with suboptimal Natures. “I saw the listing online and was hoping I could get a good deal on a Pikachu. No matter its age, it could still learn Discharge or Thunderbolt. I’ve got a couple Light Balls lying around, so I could have made a Pikachu viable. Raichu is just straight garbage.”

Despite the opaque marketing, another trainer said that she was interested in adopting the Pokémon in question.

“I only adopt elder Pokémon,” said Daphne Conrad, who was wearing a misshapen beanie that she had crocheted herself. “They just have so much personality, you know? A lot of wisdom to share. All I want is to give them a good home for however long they have left. I spend a lot of time at home, so I can give them the attention and care they need. I would love to get to know this Raichu.”

At press time, Conrad had been notified that her adoption application had been denied. The shelter declined to provide further comment.

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