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‘Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties: Definitive Edition’ Looks Great on Shelf Next To ‘Elden Ring’, ‘Resident Evil 4’ Remake

CARY, N.C. — After finally getting its due diligence and receiving the respect it rightfully deserves, sources confirm that physical copies of Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties: Definitive Edition looks absolutely stunning on a shelf next to other critically acclaimed games such as Elden Ring and the Resident Evil 4 remake.

“I’ve always thought of the two games as companion pieces to each other,” said Hidetaka Miyazaki, president of FromSoftware. “We were actually in a bidding war with Limited Run Games to earn the rights to Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties, but alas, we ended up having to make Elden Ring instead. You win some, you lose some.”

The president of Capcom, Haruhiro Tsujimoto, expressed immense pride at seeing the Resident Evil 4 remake standing proudly on a shelf next to Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties: Definitive Edition.

“Well would ya look at that,” remarked Tsujimoto. “Just like two peas in a pod, they are! Man, I really wish I could get my hands on that game… and there’s only a limited quantity, so I better act fast! Should I get the Definitive Edition, or the Definitive Edition Collector’s Edition… oh, and look at that cute anime artwork and body pillow! I just can’t decide!”

The star of Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties, Edward J. Fasulo, was surprised at all of the kind words for the game.

“Really? Those guys liked that game?” said Fasulo. “I thought everybody hated it? I mean, that Angry Video Game guy sure had some harsh things to say about it, and people were even calling it the worst game of all time! Well, I’m just happy to get my kudos even if it’s 30 years later. I always said we were making art that was way ahead of our time.”

At press time, several other gaming giants such as Nintendo, Sony, and Microsoft were all competing to see which of their games looked best standing up on a shelf next to Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties: Definitive Edition.


Written in Partnership with Limited Run Games