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Nobody Has Heart to Tell Excited Nintendo Direct Voiceover Guy That Most of the Games He’s Describing Have Been Out for Years

KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo Direct viewers around the world are anxiously tip-toeing around the voiceover guy’s oblivious hype for games everybody played years ago.

“Whoa! Get ready for this!” said the voice-over guy to viewers around the world. “There’s a new Resident Evil game!” 

“It’s just sort of sad” said viewer Jacob Blatt while twiddling his thumbs. “He’s just so ready for us to play It Takes Two and it’s like dude, we all did that over a year ago. It’s like telling a kid that Santa isn’t real; at some point you should break the news but how can you bring yourself to do it? I mean he’s saying ‘enter the world of Resident Evil 8…if you dare!’ and it’s like yeah, I did dare. In May, 2021.”

As of press time, Voiceover Guy was getting super stoked for some shit that came out in 2003.

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