SAN FRANCISCO — Local man David Grounder experienced a brief moment of anxiety during a game of Quiplash with his new friend group, as he waited patiently to find out just how cool everyone is with jokes about 9/11.
“I started hanging out with these guys in the last few weeks, and by the time I realized I don’t know if these people do bits about a Taliban plane hitting the Pentagon, I had already entered my answer,” Grounder said. “They’re all really nice, and I really want them to continue to be my friends, but I guess it’s best to just get this out of the way now, because if I’m not even allowed to poke fun at 9/11, they won’t want to be my friends for very long.”
“To say the least,” he continued, “we’re going to see if these jokes fly or if they crash and burn directly into a field.”
One of the members of Grounder’s new circle of friends, Emily Bronson, provided her recollection of the controversial Jackbox answer.
“When the answer came up, nobody read it outloud or audibly laughed, we just kind of glanced around the room at each other, looking to see how everyone felt,” Bronson said. “I could tell David was drinking in the few fleeting seconds where nobody could tell it was him, and then the card flipped over and he just kinda looked at the floor for a second.”
“He doesn’t realize that this is more of a wholesome group, I guess,” she said. “All of our answers usually are just about cum.”
Fellow Jackbox player Michael Tyrule claimed he adopts a more bold, shameless approach to playing the game.
“I’ve lost friends and made enemies from my past edgy Jackbox answers, but I’d rather die standing than live kneeling,” Tyrule said. “I’ll joke about national tragedies, I’ll personally target people in the room, and I do not give a fuck. I’ll even use my prompts to attack the looks or personality of friends or significant others that I just met that night. Sure, they rarely win. I often get Quiplashed. It’s not about that. It’s about taking a God damn stand for once in my life. I’m not just going to type ‘cum’ or ‘sex’ like these other cowards, I’m going for the gold.”
At press time, although Grounder was worried about being excluded from the group in future outings, thankfully the heat was taken off him when everyone jumped to ridicule the man who suggested the group play Bomb Corp next.