ANIMAL VILLAGE — Multiple sources have confirmed that the local branch of the Farway Museum has, like, absolutely no room for new exhibits or artifacts.
“You see, I’ve only been allotted so much space to display our collection,” said Blathers, the museum’s curator. “Resident Services are a bit sticky about that, eh wot. It’s actually astonishing how much we’ve been able to fit in here, given the tiny plot of land allocated to us. We’ve even expanded a little over time. Alas, we have no room for duplicate items. If I could purchase them for my own collection, I would. Unfortunately, I am but a humble curator and lack the endowment necessary for such transactions, so I must simply reject any donations for items or animals we are already exhibiting. Plus, I can’t say that I like the idea of a beetle having a comrade.”
Ai Villager, the Animal Village resident who donated the entirety of the museum’s collection, said she was confused and disappointed by the policy.
“Don’t museums usually have extensive archives for this kind of stuff?” said Ai. “This island is a hotbed for fossils from literally every geological era. It makes no sense to not have a catalog of fossils from different individuals for comparative purposes. Hell, I don’t know, buy a 3D-scanner so you can at least have a digital version to examine. But it’s not just fossils. I found a second legitimate copy of the Mona Lisa—you know, the most famous painting of all time? No one even knew it existed! I brought it to the museum, but Blathers wasn’t interested. I had nowhere to put it. Now, a groundbreaking historical discovery is in the mitts of a couple of juvenile raccoons. That doesn’t seem like it’s good for anyone.”
Robert Farway, president and lead curator of the Farway Museum, noted that Blather’s policy was not unusual.
“I’m not saying I approve of the practice, but I know it is a common approach in our provincial branches as well as independent rural museums,” said Farway. “Places like Pelican Town’s renowned Library & Museum face a similar issue regarding space, and the museum on Coral Island follows an identical policy. I’m told things are much the same in a place called Dinkum, but frankly I was overwhelmed and confused when I heard about that situation. I suppose it’s better than nothing. Those poor souls in Cozy Grove can only see their collections in a journal.”
At press time, the museum’s cafe claimed to have almost no available seating despite being entirely empty.
