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Wii U Web Browser Used One Last Time to List Wii U on eBay

MINNEAPOLIS — A local gamer unearthed his long idle Nintendo Wii U and used its web browser one last time to list it on eBay, sources have confirmed. 

“Wow, this is ironic,” said Troy McNeil, as he used his Wii U gamepad to take a picture of the Wii U system. “Not so much that I’m using it to post it on eBay with its own web browser, but I guess that I’m using it at all. Maybe ‘ironic’ isn’t the right word. It’s uh, it’s ‘weird’ to be using it. Maybe ‘annoying’ is the word. Oh god damn it, it’s making me enter my password on this awful tablet controller thing. I can’t talk and do this shit at the same time, okay?”

Roommates who thought they’d seen the last of the Wii U were shocked to hear of it once again. 

“Wow, fuck that thing,” said Simon Downs, a former housemate of McNeil’s. “For like a solid six months there he was trying to convince us it was a fun system with good hardware. What a rough six months, man. It’s pretty weird that he’s using it to sell itself, huh? This is like the time he drove his car across town to the guy that was buying it off of him.” 

“He had to walk home in the snow,” he added, laughing. 

As of press time, the console had been successfully listed for sale, in a post that simply reads, “For sale, Wii U, hardly played.”

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