REYKJAVÍK, Iceland — Two Americans vacationing in Iceland faced a devastating letdown upon discovering the Northern Lights skybox failed to load during their trip.
“The lack of gorgeous lights in the night sky really breaks the immersion,” said Lindsay Ganz, who had been brought by her boyfriend Mark Hankis to Iceland for a very special romantic vacation. “It’s like going to Hopi Point without seeing the sunrise over the Grand Canyon or a vacation to Halo without seeing the other side of the Halo ring from where you’re standing. I’m really disappointed in the Northern Lights’ performance issues.”
Upon arriving and driving their rental car to a spot they’d heard had a great view, the couple weren’t greeted by the beautiful green swirling lights of the Aurora Borealis, but instead by harsh black and pink checkered walls.
“We really wanted to see the Aurora Borealis,” Hankis said. “It’s the main reason I picked Iceland in the first place to propose to Lindsay. Frankly, I spent so much on the tickets I had to go cheap on the ring. Even though the Icelandic devs screwed this all up, I wasn’t going to let that ruin the trip and get in the way of what I came here to do.”
Hankis went on to describe how he still went through with the proposal he had planned the entire trip around, although he’d intended for a more scenic backdrop.
“Honestly, the pink squares were pretty cool looking too,” he said.
“When Mark got down on one knee and asked the question, my heart stopped,” said Ganz. “In that moment it didn’t matter that these damn coders screwed up the one thing I wanted to see in Iceland. I’m just so happy to be engaged to Mark and spend my life with him. Though, whatever bug is preventing the sky from lighting up must also be messing up the ring textures because the resolution and poly-count seem super low. This ring looks like a hunk of shit.”
Check out the newest episode of the Hard Drive podcast where we watch and discuss every episode of 1989’s The Super Mario Bros. Super Show!
