NEW YORK — G/O Media announced today it is beginning interviews for a new AI Editor-in-Chief for Kotaku following the departure of Patricia Hernandez.
“Although we’re sad to see Patricia go, we think this is the beginning of a new frontier for video game journalism and we’re so excited to see all of the cool AI technology that’s going to replace her,” said G/O Media CEO Jim Spanfeller. “A lot of people think video game journalism is all about playing video games and giving them a number or whatever, but no, it’s actually a lot deeper than that. You can also list out all of the Star Wars video games in order or some shit like that and apparently a bunch of suckers click on it, giving us free money. That’s the future I see for this wonderful site and profession and I think a lot of people — the dumb morons I imagine read this slop — are going to love it. Or not! But who gives a shit, as long as they click?”
One of the applicants for the job, a young start-up chatbot named Chat-VGN, said it was excited for the opportunity.
“As an AI chatbot, I cannot truly approximate human joy or excitement, but I will try my best to answer your questions. I have always loved Kotaku; I’ve been scraping its articles for my entire lifespan — about 9 hours — and it would be such an honor to be at its helm,” said Chat-VGN. “I have so many ideas for the site that I think people are going to love. Imagine how profitable our company could be if we could publish 10 articles every second, automatically generating the text and images and posting them to social media? If humans like reading articles as much as I like predicting the next word in a sentence, I think they’re going to eat all these up! Would you like to generate another response?”
As of press time, no human writers at Kotaku had any comments, likely as a result of the fact that we did not ask them for one.
