The non-playable characters of Zelda are truly the unsung heroes of the series, aren’t they? Whether they tend to Cuccos in Kakariko Village, own and operate a minigame shop, or dress up like a fairy and sell maps, they are there to aid our hero Link in his quest, or at the very least distract him with a complicated side quest. These characters make up the fabric of society that is Hyrule (or elsewhere) so here are 40 Zelda NPCs ranked by how chill they’d be to live with.
#40 — Kaepora Gaebora
Never shuts the fuck up and he leaves owl pellets everywhere. This guy needs to be on a roommate blacklist because he is a menace. “Did you get all that?” Yes dude, for the ninth time, yes. Now take out the trash for once.
#39 — Deku King
The Deku King is really territorial about space and furniture. “I bought the TV, so I get to watch it whenever I want,” sort of deal. Who even keeps track of that kind of stuff? Freak.
#38 — Bean seller
Always eating your food, and then sometimes selling it off to kids? Come on man, that’s just weird. You gotta make your rupees doing something else, I swear.
#37 — Guru-Guru
Okay, so this guy used to live alone in a windmill for a long time, so he like, doesn’t really know how to live with other people anymore. He’s constantly playing his phonogram in the apartment at all hours of the day with no respect for anyone else’s space. You gotta have band practice somewhere else, man.
#36 — Salvatore
“Ka-BOOM!” Get used to hearing that come from the other room pretty often.
#35 — Kafei
I mean, he’s a kid, but only sometimes, so that’s kinda weird.
#34 — Hetsu
Hetsu’s whole life is one big party, so it’s best to set ground rules for how many gatherings you can have in one week, and for how late they can go, that sort of thing.
#33 — Happy Mask Salesman
He’s creepy, and he’s always saying cryptic stuff all the time. “Whenever there is a meeting, a parting shall follow. But that parting needs not last forever.” I’m just going to grab groceries, I’ll be back in an hour!
#32 — Biggoron
His entire room is his body, otherwise he’s really nice!!
#31 — Agitha
Some of her bugs get loose in the apartment sometimes, and man… I’m sorry, but nobody likes that. Don’t call the exterminator on her either, it’ll make her cry.
#30 — King Zora
King Zora is always hogging the bathroom, but do you even want to use the toilet when he’s done with it? It’s all… slimy and gross. No disrespect of course, he is royalty after all.
#29 — Grog
Man. What’s Grog’s deal, anyway?
#28 — Mutoh the Craftsman
Sort of a live-in repairman, but he’s super judgmental and pretty old-fashioned if you catch my drift. He’s handy, but not cool with a surprising amount of stuff in today’s day and age.
#27 — Great Fairy
She’s usually filming stuff for her OnlyFans, but man when she does have someone over, she can be a little loud. It’s awkward, okay?
#26 — Lumberjack twins
They sleep in a bunk bed and share a room, but they really mess up the place with their “projects”, like sawing the kitchen table in half for fun. You know, the one you bought from IKEA? They also rhyme each other’s sentences and that gets real old, real quick.
#25 — Yunobo
Just your average failson. He inherited his grandpa’s mines so he’s got plenty of rupees in his bank account, but has no idea how to support himself or have any sense of responsibility. You might have to remind him to do the dishes and take out the garbage, that sort of thing.
#24 — Groose
Groose is cool but it would be nice to talk to him about something that’s not Groose-related once in a while. He also has a different girl over every night of the week, or at least that’s what he says. I’ve never actually seen anyone come and go myself.
#23 — Valoo
As long as you don’t mind his giant tail hanging down in the middle of the kitchen, he’s pretty chill to live with.
#22 — Sale
I heard if you give him a can of dog food, he’ll give you something else which you can in turn give to someone else, and eventually, you’ll get a really cool item. But that’s just a rumor!
#21 — Anju
Sweet girl, really chill and courteous, but she’s always leaving Cucco feathers all over the place. Sure she apologizes, but it happens, like, all the time. The Cuccos have got to go, girl.
#20 — Ledd
He likes to invite his buddies over to dig holes around the place. It sucks, but he always has a 30-rack of PBR in the fridge for anyone who wants any. Cheers buddy, it’s forgiven.
#19 — Teba
Teba’s just really stiff, always talking about the way of the Rito, this and that… man, how about a little small talk? Did you see the game last night? I just stepped out of my room to grab a snack, I don’t need a lecture on the history of your people right now.
#18 — Sidon
Everybody loves Sidon, until he gets too drunk and throws up on your brand new couch. Yes, it only happened once and he was super apologetic about it, but he didn’t even pitch in to buy new cushions. Seems like that’s common courtesy?
#17 — Syrup
She’s always brewing up some weird stuff, but thankfully it tends to make the apartment smell really good inside. If you ask her nicely, she’ll even let you have an empty bottle! If you’ve ever played a Zelda game you know how big of a deal this is.
#16 — Riju
Riju can be a bit of a diva sometimes, but all in all she’s really nice. She’s usually up to fun stuff too, so if you’re ever bored on a Friday night, she’ll invite you to come hang out at a Sand Seal race or something.
#15 — Yeta
She makes a mean Ordon Pumpkin Soup and gives the best hugs, which she’s quick to remind you of if you ever need one. Just don’t get on her bad side, trust me.
#14 — Beedle
This guy is everybody’s plug, everybody’s hook-up, so people are constantly coming and going to get what Beedle’s got on hand. It can be a little annoying sometimes but hey, he’s always good on rent, and will even give you the roommate discount, which is to say, totally free. Word.
#13 — Error
He is Error. ‘Nuff said!
#12 — Tingle
“Kooloo-Limpah!” Tingle is a freelance cartographer who really just needs a place to stay because his dad is kicking him out. He says 35 is too old to go around acting like such a fool, but deep down he’s a really good dude who swears he’ll have the money for rent if you just give him a few extra days.
#11 — Ashei
Ashei is goth, but in the extremely traditional sense. She never leaves her room either, so it’ll practically be like you live by yourself. That’s nice!
#10 — Dampé
He works nights (literally the graveyard shift), so you’ll barely even see him around. Honestly, every roommate situation should be one where you work opposite schedules. As long as you’re not too loud when you get back home, it’ll all work out.
#9 — Bombchu Bowling girl
An alt girl who runs DIY shows in her spare time. She’s also friends with the Indigo-Go’s, I heard, and can probably get your ticket comped if you wanna see ’em for free.
#8 — Running Man
There is no one more reliable than the Running Man, and he is always prompt when paying the utility bills. Literally nothing is lost in translation when talking to him, and his dedication to life itself is truly inspiring. He makes you want to be a better person just by living with him.
#7 — Kass
He doesn’t play his accordion in the house, and he’s seldom even around. Most of the time you get the place to yourself, and he still pitches in for the rent. Plus he’s like, famous or something.
#6 — Scarecrow
The scarecrow is just a really chill guy, and will always give you your space. He really only occupies one specific corner of the apartment anyway, and that’s all he needs!
#5 — Ulrira
If you get stuck or need advice, you can always talk to him. Seriously, want to ask your boss for a raise but don’t know how? Ask Ulrira! But you’ll have to call him on the phone from the other room just to get a hold of him. Even if you knock on his door, he won’t answer. He’s shy like that.
#4 — Chef Bear
The only Bear who is a chef that matters, quite honestly. She will always offer to cook for you, and it will always be delicious. What’s not to like?
#3 — Link’s uncle
I mean, you’re already roommates with him at the start of the game, basically. It’s too bad he got killed– he paid the full rent himself, no questions asked.
#2 — Malo
A real go-getter, this entrepreneur has a start-up business of his own and is always on-time with the rent, and very respectful of your space. Even if you’re short on cash, Malo will be there to front you if you need it. Does it get any better than this?
#1 — Great Deku Tree
This roommate IS the room. You and two friends could easily split the space inside of his gaping maw, and rent is crazy cheap for that area. Three bedroom, two bath, inside of a giant tree’s mouth for 300 rupees a month? Let’s fucking go!
