Press "Enter" to skip to content

Servers at Netflix Restaurant Constantly Asking Patrons If They’re Still Eating

LOS ANGELES — Netflix Bites, a pop up kitchen featuring world-renowned chefs from the streaming giant’s programming, opened this month to wide criticism regarding its service.

“The waitress just hovered over my shoulder the entire time,” said Kathy Johansen, who shared that she had come to the restaurant to get exclusive food that she couldn’t find anywhere else. “Every few bites, she’d ask me if I was still eating. I guess I could have told her not to ask me again, but I was so eager to get to the next little morsel that I didn’t even think of it. I just said yes and kept shoveling Asian fusion into my maw.”

Marcy Harris, a local who noted that she had visited the establishment several nights in a row out of convenience, said that overbearing servers aren’t the only issue she has with Netflix Bites.

“The menu is terrible,” said Harris. “It seemed kind of overwhelming at first, but after a few visits I realized that there actually weren’t that many dishes. They just kept repeating the same meals in different categories with weird descriptions, like ‘Vegetarian Stir-Fry for LGBTQ+ Teens.’ After reading through the whole thing, I’m usually so exhausted that I just order the same thing I always get, which luckily has its own section right at the top.”

Terry Cline, a former employee who left the restaurant due to stress, stated that the controversial decisions had come straight from the top.

“They kept making us do weird stuff, like all of a sudden we were supposed to ask customers not to share food with each other or we would have to charge them more,” said Cline. “The customers always assumed I was doing a Tim Robinson bit as some sort of cross-promotion, but management was totally serious. I started adding the additional fee to the bill without saying anything. Nobody noticed.”

At press time, Netflix announced that it was sunsetting a separate food delivery service that it had been running for decades, reporting that no one really used it anymore.

Hello adventurer! Please collect three sheep skins and head to our Patreon.
Become a patron at Patreon!