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Podcast Finally Successful Enough to Commission Obnoxious Theme Song

KANSAS CITY, Mo. — “Best Boys,” a film and culture criticism podcast created and produced by two local men, recently paid an artist to create an over-produced and irritating theme song for the show, production sources have confirmed.

“Ever since we started this crazy little project, I’ve been saying the one thing I wanted was a real theme song,” said Ed Williams, one of the podcast’s two 35-year-old hosts. “You know, something that pulls from a bunch of my favorite genres. Especially chiptune. Honestly, I mostly asked for rough chiptune. There’s no better way to prepare your brain for an hour of two dudes chatting about movies than a raw square wave blaring in your ears!”

Listener reaction to the new theme has been mixed, though some fans enthusiastically approved of the new intro.

“I feel like I can finally share the podcast with my friends now,” said Steve Estrada, a self-described film nerd and longtime fan of the podcast. “It just feels so official. I especially like the part where Ed awkwardly says the name of the podcast over the music. Sure, he doesn’t nail the beat, but it’s just so him. He loves ay-vant gard-ay [sic] stuff like that.”

While some fans were concerned that the podcasting duo had been overcharged for a substandard theme, the song’s composer claimed that she offered them a fair price.

“I don’t think it’s correct to say that I’m scamming these guys,” said Mary Booker, a digital audio freelancer who says she has created themes for dozens of podcasts. “I gave them a perfectly reasonable product for what they were willing to pay. I would be happy to make something new for them if they ever get that twenty-fifth Patreon subscriber and start making real money.”

At press time, Williams was reportedly increasing the levels on the theme song in order to give it more “punch.”