Press "Enter" to skip to content

Anime Scientists Confirm Swords Can Cut Totally Through Bullets In Mid-Air

KYOTO — After analyzing footage from an intense fight scene where a protagonist was able to cut through a bullet fired from his opponent’s gun, anime scientists confirmed this week that the blade of a sword can totally cut through a bullet in mid-air.

“We’ve seen it enough times to say definitively that the blade of a katana or any such caliber of weapon can slice through a bullet in its trajectory path,” said Professor Matsumoto, adjusting his swirly glasses. “This of course causes the bullet to bisect perfectly in half, ricocheting off into two lateral directions. This leaves the swordwielder unharmed, and looking completely badass.”

The swordsman in question, Goemon Ishikawa, offered some insight from the scene.

“Whenever someone pulls a gun on me, it’s just instinct, I guess,” stated Ishikawa. “I immediately reach for my sword, draw my blade, and bam, it’s over. Bullet’s cut in half, and so is the guy holding the gun. Whoever said not to bring a sword to a gunfight is full of shit, and thankfully now anime science can back that up.”

Professor Matsumoto continued on about his research on the topic.

“A lot of people are wondering if this sort of thing can work in real life,” said Matsumoto. “And I really don’t know. I’m just a cartoon character. That’s really more of a question for the Myth Busters or something. Matter of fact, they probably should check on that. Someone could get seriously hurt on the set of a Netflix live-action reboot or something.”

At press time, bullets were also proven to be ineffective against magic, giant robots, and condensed energy blasts.

Hello adventurer! Please collect three sheep skins and head to our Patreon.
Become a patron at Patreon!