Rat Actually Very Hard to Kill With a Sword March 31, 2022 TACOMA, Wash. — Regional gamer Teddy Thorpe was surprised to discover that a rat in his basement was actually quite… Read More →
LED on Vape Pen Used to Navigate Dark Basement March 26, 2022 PITTSBURGH — A man stranded in the dark during a recent power outage reportedly used the light on the end… Read More →
Newly-Elected Mayor Pledges to Build Roads, Expand Industrial District, Summon Deadly Tornado January 15, 2022 OW MY ASSVILLE — The mysterious new mayor, who no one remembers electing, has laid out a bold plan for… Read More →
Man Binging New Podcast Reaches the One After Trump Got Elected January 11, 2022 NEW YORK — A man binge-listening to the backlog of his new favorite podcast has finally gotten to the one… Read More →
Reviewer Who Rated Game 10/10 Wasn’t Paid by Developer or at All November 9, 2021 LOS ANGELES — Despite online rumors to the contrary, budding game critic Tamara Bakker maintained she was not paid for… Read More →
Opinion: Video Games Are Not Art. They Are Better November 2, 2021 Seems like each year the online talking heads and so-called professional critics mark off time in their calendar for a… Read More →
Proud Man Once Afraid of Dying a Virgin Now Just Afraid of Dying October 23, 2021 JERSEY CITY, N.J. — Local gamer Mike Plant, who once feared dying a virgin, now only fears death following a… Read More →
Police Edition of Duck Hunt Only Lets You Shoot Dog October 5, 2021 LOS ANGELES — An unexpected reboot of the classic light gun shooter Duck Hunt was announced today that casts the… Read More →
Gamers Beware: Perverts are Trying to Make the Word ‘Load’ a Sex Thing September 16, 2021 Awful news, Gamers. If you are at work please stop reading immediately because this article may be considered NOT SAFE.… Read More →
Lockheed Martin Assures Pentagon “Robot Boy” Project Will Meet 20XX Deadline August 17, 2021 BETHESDA, Md. — In what many are calling the Pentagon’s latest boondoggle, mainstay military contractor Lockheed Martin has already missed… Read More →