COLUMBIA, Mo. — A collection of friends hanging out and playing games together Thursday night noted that the unfunny friend of the group off-handedly requested that everyone play a different game than Quiplash, according to close sources.
“Hey guys, Fibbage is really cool, I like that one a lot. Maybe we can play that one now?” unfunny friend group member Danny Robinson casually began. “Yeah, Quiplash is cool, we’ll totally play that one later, but let’s start out with the T-Shirt one, you know, like as a warm-up. Then we’ll play the trivia murder game and if we have time we can play Quiplash. Oh, okay! You all want to play Quiplash. We can start with one round of that and then try one of those games that we’ve all never played just to see what they’re like. Oh we’re starting a third round of Quiplash? That’s cool, that’s cool.”
Robinson’s friends claimed that they knew this awkward situation would occur.
“He’s not funny, but I promise he’s a really nice guy!” pleaded roommate Nick Martins. “I tried to extend an olive branch by letting him ‘be on my team,’ as if that’s a thing, but he rebuffed me. Sure, we could play one of the other games, but you don’t even get to be funny in those. I don’t care if I hurt my friend’s feelings, I’m not playing Bomb Corp. I’m just worried if we play Quiplash long enough, he’ll just get to the point of desperation where he just puts in slurs.”
At press time, sources close to Robinson reported that he was dealt a devastating blow when his friend group ironically gave his clearly terrible answer a Quiplash as a bit.