Nik Theorin
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TARTARUS — After untold centuries of grinding, Sisyphus’s divine punishment was briefly alleviated this week after the Greek King of…
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Kelley Greene
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JERUSALEM — An updated version of Jesus has been re-released after only three days, but many followers are unhappy with…
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Garry Kerls
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HEAVEN – In a desperate plea to get gamers into pews, the Almighty Father has announced double XP for all…
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Michael Shurtz
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PEARLY GATES — Researchers from the National Institute of Health have found the declining birth rates around the world are…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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NEW YORK — Local gamer Seth Reyes attempted to harness the powers of God Himself by building his own computer…
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Kyle Erf
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SAN FRANCISCO — An outraged God descended upon the Earth today, and among other things announced that He saw every…
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Tyler Simpson
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HEAVEN — After over 810 years, God responded to medieval peasant Millicent Gascoigne’s prayer pleading for Him to relieve her…
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Camden Brazile
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ST. LOUIS — Local priest Father Johnathan Samson admitted in his homily Sunday that anime character Goku could beat up…
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Camden Brazile
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EAST OF EDEN — Son of Adam and Eve and one of the only four people alive, Cain, was caught…
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JERUSALEM — Local unemployed man and follower of Jesus of Nazareth, Thomas the Apostle, revealed his disappointment following the crucifixion…
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