July 25, 2017 Trump Reminds GOP Senators Before Healthcare Vote “No Russian” Trump Reminds GOP Senators Before Healthcare Vote “No Russian” WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump grimly said to GOP lawmakers “Remember, no Russian,” moments before the elevator doors opened to the Senate floor for the…
July 17, 2017 This Guy Made a Fully Functioning Computer in Minecraft That Blocks @notch on Twitter This Guy Made a Fully Functioning Computer in Minecraft That Blocks @notch on Twitter Whoa! We spoke to the brilliant Cody Bigley today, who used hundreds of thousands of blocks in the virtual world of Minecraft to build a…
July 11, 2017 Climate Scientists Warn That All Super Mario Levels Will Be Underwater by 2025 Climate Scientists Warn That All Super Mario Levels Will Be Underwater by 2025 PARIS — Top climate scientists released a new peer-reviewed research paper today, which warns that all Super Mario stages will become underwater levels within the…
June 28, 2017 I Don’t Care If You Agree With His Policies, Bowser Is Your King I Don’t Care If You Agree With His Policies, Bowser Is Your King Not your king, huh? Grow up. Quick question: are you a citizen of the Mushroom Kingdom? And is there a giant black flag with Bowser’s…
June 27, 2017 Black Mage Tired of Being Followed Around Item Shop Black Mage Tired of Being Followed Around Item Shop CORNELIA, World A — A heated confrontation took place at the item shop earlier today, involving a black mage who claims he was being unfairly…
June 22, 2017 Bill Maher Apologizes for Using Racial Slur During Overwatch Match Bill Maher Apologizes for Using Racial Slur During Overwatch Match LOS ANGELES — Bill Maher apologized on Friday night’s broadcast of Real Time after using a hateful epithet during a recent online match of the…
June 6, 2017 How Violent Video Games Taught Me to Remove the Pool Steps and Just Watch Loved Ones Swim Around Endlessly Until They Die How Violent Video Games Taught Me to Remove the Pool Steps and Just Watch Loved Ones Swim Around Endlessly Until They Die I didn’t want to do it—I really didn’t. I tried to resolve the communication problems I had with my family, but it was like…
June 5, 2017 Girl Who Claims to Like Video Games Grilled for 10 Hours at Senate Hearing Girl Who Claims to Like Video Games Grilled for 10 Hours at Senate Hearing WASHINGTON D.C. — After reportedly stating at a casual gathering of friends that her favorite series was Mass Effect and that she is “super excited” for…
May 21, 2017 Top Ranked Call of Duty Player Also Noted Race Scholar Top Ranked Call of Duty Player Also Noted Race Scholar COLUMBUS, Ohio — Local student Hollis Wheaton gave a groundbreaking lecture last night on American race relations while holding the top spot in a game…
