WASHINGTON — This week, incoming president Donald Trump announced his staff picks in preparation for his second term as president. One pick getting a lot of attention is his pick to lead the Department of Energy, President Shinra.
President Shinra, the controversial leader of the Shinra Electric Company, has been eyeing the position for decades, seeing it as a next step in controlling the world’s mako reserves.
“This appointment should cause concerns,” said political analyst Jeremy Schwitz. “President Shinra has never been shy about his lust for controlling the entire world’s mako supply and if he’s leading the Department of Energy then he essentially has a free pass to do whatever he wants.”
A strong supporter of US involvement in the Middle East, President Shinra has been very forward in expressing his plan for the region.
“There are untapped mako reserves that would be valuable to m-, I mean the United States,” he said in a statement to the press. “My position on this has nothing to do with the fact that my company also manufactures weapons. But rest assured, should militants within the region try to stop us from harvesting mako, our Scorpion Sentinel will make quick work of them”
Trump’s choice is facing opposition from many people around the country, primarily in regions controlled by Shinra.
“He destroyed a whole district of my city,” one activist said. “Then once the mako well had dried up, he abandoned the city taking all the profits for himself. My whole family lives in a shack under a destroyed highway.”
President Shinra has denied the allegations, claiming “eco-terrorists” are responsible, despite evidence of the contrary.
“These terrorists are claiming I’m destroying the environment and contributing to climate change,” he said. “It’s their illegal destruction of my perfectly safe and environmentally friendly Mako Reactors that caused most of the destruction. They may say they did it to help the common folk who we have to keep oppressed in order to maintain high stock prices but they are liars.”
At press time, we’ve yet to see whether Republican congressmen will be willing to confirm a pick so controversial, but since Shinra donated to their political campaigns, it’s unlikely they will vote against him.
