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Skyrim Cosplayer Also Has Awkward Dialogue

SAN DIEGO — An The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim cosplayer on the convention floor achieved a new level of realism with their costume by also having awkward dialogue, according to confused attendants.

“Greetings, hello there,” began cosplayer Eric Roberts in a stilted monotone. “Allow me to offer you a photo with me, or provide any directions around the convention center. Have you eaten today? The food court has bountiful chicken strips and crinkle-cut french fries. Feel free to visit if you have the time. Are you dressed up as Wario from Super Mario Brothers? That is most amusing. I will tell my friends of your overalls and silly hat for many moons. Where are you going? Would you like me to repeat all that?”

People walking the convention floor were undecided whether or not Roberts’ stiff conversations were an aspect of his cosplay or just who he is as a person.

“I can’t tell if this is part of his costume or if he just doesn’t have many friends,” said comic con attendee Shirley White. “He just kind of stands there with his arms by his side waiting for people to come up and talk to him, then he mechanically turns around and starts babbling, not letting anyone get a word in. That’s either next level Skyrim immersion or crippling social awkwardness. If he runs out of talking points, he just starts repeating the exact same things he’s talked to you about, and then tries to slowly walk away when you’re done talking to him.”

At press time, convention attendees became additionally concerned when Roberts was unphased by a dead body on the convention floor, just stepping over it and continuing to go about his day.

Photo by Silverflame Pictures.

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