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Planet Discovered in No Man’s Sky Where Google Glass Caught On

GUILDFORD, U.K. — Dedicated No Man’s Sky players have made perhaps the most shocking discovery among the game’s 18 quintillion planets yet: a world where Google Glass caught on a few years ago. 

“I’ve never seen anything like this,” said Ellen Ramsay, a longtime player of the space exploration sim that made the discovery. “At first I was just blown away because I had found a randomly generated planet that seemed so much like Earth. It had everything; the religion, the sports, I think I saw a Burger King. Except I realized everyone was walking around with this weird thing on their head. After a while I figured it out; this was some alternate version of 2018 Earth, and Google Glass had totally caught on like they wanted it to. They looked so weird, man.” 

The discovery was surprising to many, including Google executives. 

“Well, I’m glad it caught on somewhere,” said John Grogan, an engineering director at Google. “Now, I am of course obligated to point out that we at Google don’t so much see the rollout of Glass as a failure, so much as a product we had to re-calibrate our expectations on after the public soundly rejected it. But Google Glass is still available in the Enterprise Edition. In fact,  the Enterprise Edition 2 came out just a couple years ago. But I assume you already knew that, right? Did you know that already? You probably did.” 

The developers of No Man’s Sky say the discovery speaks to the game’s unlimited potential. 

“Oh wow, this is really something,” said Sean Murray, co-creator of No Man’s Sky. “We worked hard on this game, and we would be nowhere without the dedicated community that we have today that has worked just as hard. To comb through our digital universe we’ve created and actually find a world where people wished they had Google just hanging out right over their eyeballs is just tremendous. It’s really mind blowing stuff when you think about it. Hey, any word if they were still charging $1,500 down there on that planet? I’m just curious.” 

As of press time, further exploration of the planet where Google Glass caught on also revealed a surprising number of people using Windows phones to watch shows on Quibi.