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Pervert Zelda Boss Exposes Weak Point To Unsuspecting Subway Crowd

WASHINGTON — Over a dozen people were left perturbed after a living wraith, later identified as 4,096 year old dungeon boss Miegeinos, The Infinite Sovereign, unbuckled his cloak and exposed his weak point to fellow Green Line patrons Thursday evening.

“It was… definitely noticeable, I’ll put it that way,” local passenger Leah Aaronson reported. “Which I suppose is kind of the point. God, I bet he gets off on this. The little fucker was issuing dark portents and dread proclamations the entire time, too. Ugh. What a freak. And it nearly happened a second time, since someone was just jamming the A button to get through the dialogue and almost said ‘yes’ when he asked if we wanted to see it again.”

The Undying King was eventually subdued by another passenger after a brief physical altercation, in which Miegeinos was Z-Targeted and then struck repeatedly in the obvious weak spot.

“I mean, come on. The thing is just right there,” said Metro Transit chief of police Michael Anzallo. “It’s like the first thing you notice when you look at this creep. Nevermind the fact that it’s flashing red and yellow. I’m glad we got this pervert off the street. Mark my words, DC: he won’t be exposing his weak point to anyone no more.”

In a statement to the press, the not-fully-voiced King Of All simply laughed, while his text box declared ‘I have seen the premonitions, I know what the oracles say. Those ladies loved it and want more!’

As of press time, Miegeinos will be serving his sentence in the boss room of the Ossified Feretory, for five to ten years, or possibly earlier if the Hero Of Hope shows up with the Fluted Trident, the one item that can end the Desiccated Emperor’s reign over life and undeath, first.

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