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Nintendo Announces Mother Box Set That’s ⅓ Empty

KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo announced a collector’s edition boxed set honoring the cult RPG series Mother that will only be two thirds full of stuff, sources have confirmed. 

“Good news for Mother fans!” said a press release issued by Nintendo today. “Since you’ve supported this series for years and kept the conversation going around EarthBound (and those other two games), we’ve decided to give you exactly what you’ve been asking for. We think this box set will be exactly what all long time fans of the series will come to expect, including copies of EarthBound and EarthBound Beginnings, a couple of posters, a book of conceptual art, an adorable Poo keychain, and absolutely no mention whatsoever of Mother 3.” 

“People don’t really seem as into that one,” the statement continued. “So you’ll see when you open the thing up where it would’ve gone if we had decided to include it. But we didn’t!” 

Fans of the series were disappointed but ultimately not surprised about the exclusion of one third of the beloved trilogy. 

“The Mother box set is kind of cool, don’t get me wrong, but it’s also underwhelming,” said Gary Williams, a longtime fan of the series who is still holding out hope for an official domestic release of Mother 3, even though you can just go online and get the really good fan translation for free as soon as you’re done reading (and sharing) this article. “I just don’t know why Nintendo can’t put part three in there? It’s pretty weird how they have Lucas all over the box art and everything if they’re not going to give us the game he’s in. I hoped that putting EarthBound Beginnings on the Switch Online service was a sign of good things to come, but sadly, I think it may have been a drip of Mother content that is meant to last us for a few more decades.”

As of press time, Nintendo confirmed that there would be a collector’s edition of the Mother boxed set that includes a special display case that would look really neat with a copy of Mother 3 in it.


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