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New Diablo 4 Update Will Revolutionize How You Press and Hold Left Mouse Button

An upcoming Diablo IV update will reportedly revolutionize how players hold down the left mouse button.

“We have been working on finalizing this exciting update for quite some time,” said head of Blizzard development Robert Sebastian. “This is something the team is really excited about and we hope it will give players even more freedom from the rather complicated multi-button games out there.”

The new update will reportedly allow Diablo IV players to bind every single action in the game to one key, granting them the ability to slay thousands of demons with the literal push of a button.

“Players could theoretically make a milkshake, call a friend, or even file their taxes while also taking on over 45,000 enemies,” said Sebastian. “Players can move forward and backward, shoot fireballs and reanimate corpses with just this one button. And you won’t even need to press it as many times anymore.”

Diablo IV players said they welcomed the update, as ultimately just clicking away to annihilate hordes of demons, monsters, and other ugly things can become a bit burdensome.

“I kinda fell off after playing the game a bit in the beginning,” said Dan Publin. “Using both my hands to grind really caused a lot of strain, both physically and mentally. This couldn’t have come at a better time. I’m ready to give it another go.”

“The original idea was to add a “Win Now” button to Diablo IV,” said gameplay manager Logan Shugdun. “But we discovered players wanted to have at least a little input in the game. With the new one-button feature, which we are calling Diablo: Express, players don’t need to worry about remembering complicated key bindings.”

At press time, Blizzard is also reportedly working on adding the new feature inside Diablo IV’s in-game store, streamlining the shopping process for players by allowing them to buy every cosmetic with a single click.

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