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Mad Catz Steam Deck Competitor Just a Sack of Loose Buttons and Chips

SAN DIEGO — Following the announcements of Asus’ ROG Ally and Lenovo’s Legion Go, third party video game peripheral company Mad Catz has announced its own competitor to the Steam Deck, and apparently it’s just a sack full of loose buttons and chips. 

“We’re so proud to announce the Storm Duck,” said William Franks, CEO of Mad Catz. “While it cannot reach the performance and battery heights the Steam Deck does, nor is it put together when it arrives at your house, but we think the competitive price and comparable gaming experience makes it a worthwhile consideration for the gamer with a budget. You guys all have screwdrivers and soldering irons, right?” 

The announcement shocked and disappointed gamers all over. 

“First of all that sounds absolutely terrible, sack or no sack,” said Lou Sampson, a local gamer that had been displeased with Mad Catz products in the past. “And second of all, the odds of me asking for a Steam Deck for Christmas and getting one of those awful looking bags full of parts is now officially enough to worry me. God damn you, Mad Catz. You’ve plagued me all of my life and my hatred for you knows no slumber.” 

Early reviews of the portable Mad Catz console were not kind. 

“Maybe if you’re into LEGO’s or something it could be fun to spend a week putting it together, but I just wanted to play some video games,” said Stacey Weakes, who reviewed an advance copy of the portable gaming console. “And I have to say, once I got it together, I just had a clear, bulky handheld system that barely world and had way too many grips and turbo buttons on it for some reason. Exactly what you’d expect from Mad Catz. I thought they went out of business?”

As of press time, the Mad Catz steam deck knockoff will be out just in time to ruin your 2023 holiday season. 

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