Guilty pleasure gaming exists. There are countless anecdotes of sinking entirely too many hours into something like Powerwash Simulator or Among Us, but those are just harmless fun. Other games are enjoyed for the wrong reasons or simply just bring out the worst in people. If you know anybody playing these five games, reconsider your relationship with them. If you’ve played these games, apologize to yourself and to those around you.
#5 — Atomic Heart
“Crispy Critters” is not a phrase you ever want to hear in casual conversation. However, that’s not the issue I have with this game. Hell, I don’t even have an issue with the Soviet propaganda or Mundfish’s alleged ties to Mother Russia herself. It’s those damn robot twins. People who play this game are too likely to bring up their favorite jiggle physics mods. You can’t risk being convinced to try one out — you may never turn back.
#4 — Welcome To The Game II
Are you obsessed with the Dark Web? Are you also paranoid about home invasion? Welcome To The Game II achieves this blend perfectly. The more you read about someone like The Doll Maker, the further in your walls I am. Don’t like it? Too bad. I have your IP and am reporting you to the authorities for remembering the lore of the Deep Wiki verbatim.
#3 — Rainbow Six Siege
In what can only be described as a slightly less toxic version of Counter-Strike, Rainbow Six Siege excels at being a game where you get called slurs for losing a 5v1. This anger should be directed at Ubisoft until they announce another Splinter Cell game.
#2 — League of Legends
Nobody can truthfully tell us they enjoy this game for long periods of time. I have seen the wills of the strongest men broken over games of League. Donate to your local LoL streamer so they can afford BetterHelp. They’ll thank you later.
#1 — Five Nights At Freddy’s
This is a safe space. We can admit the amount of MatPat videos on Five Nights at Freddy’s lore we’ve seen. However, players are giving Scott Cawthon his own MCU level FNAF Cinematic Universe and it is only a matter of time before Universal Studios Horror Nights has its own Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria maze. Once that happens, the Bite of ‘87 will be a reality. And you’ll wish you heeded my advice and avoided this game at all costs.
