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Gamer Removes Two of His Ribs so He Can Reach the Controller on the Floor

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. — Hardcore gamer Brian Ramirez recently entered a clinic that specializes in body modifications for gamers to remove two of his ribs so he could reach his controller on the floor. 

Ramirez had recently dropped his controller and was unable to reach out to it on the floor when he realized that he needed professional help. 

”It was my usual night of playing Forza Motorsport for 8 hours straight and after losing the final lap I threw my controller to the floor. I was just so mad. But what happened next was unimaginable. I was unable to retrieve it. My ass was so glued to the leather couch that it was impossible for me to get up. I tried to bend down but I only got so close,” said Ramirez. 

Brian’s mother Jane found his son in a weird position on the couch. 

“I busted in Brian’s game room and he looked like he was trying to… you know. I yelled ’Brian, what are you doing?’ and he explained with teary eyes that he couldn’t reach his controller. Thankfully I had just seen on Facebook Doctor Dreponovitz’s commercial for his clinic that focuses on helping gamers. We called the doctor immediately”.

“When Brian contacted us here at ’Gamer’s Delight Clinic’ I told him that this is a basic procedure that we do these days,” explained Doctor Stephen Dreponovitz. “A lot of gamers have reached out… no pun intended, that not only are they unable to grab their controller from the floor but they are willing to modify their body to quite extremes. One gamer even asked if it’s possible to have four arms so he could play co-op games alone. I said to him the same thing I said to Brian. Anything is possible.” 

Brian’s procedure was a success and his mother is very happy for her boy.

“He now keeps his door locked and tells me not to bother him when the Forza soundtrack is playing loudly. I guess he is just happy now that he can finally reach his controller. He seems way more relaxed. I couldn’t be happier for him. Thank god for Doctor Dreponovitz.”

At press time, Ramirez has not been seen leaving his room in the weeks since the surgery but he has posted to Twitter claiming he is now considering elongating his arms so he can place his controller on its custom stand without having to get up.

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