GLENDALE, Calif. — DreamWorks Animation Studio released the first teaser trailer for Shrek 5 which debuted a new look for Shrek that had many fans asking the question, “Why the fuck does Shrek not look like Sonic?”
“It was a creative decision that our animators made, and we stand by that choice,” said DreamWorks Animation President Margie Cohn. “We knew some would not like the decision, but we felt very strongly that our favorite ogre should not look like a hedgehog. Plus, it would stick out like a sore thumb. This franchise has always had a strange, somewhat uncanny aesthetic, and a slick, stylish design like Sonic’s simply wouldn’t fit in.”
One fan, Harriet Campbell, felt compelled to voice her displeasure by protesting outside DreamWorks Headquarters in downtown Glendale.
“This design is even ugly for an ogre! I mean, my God,” said Campbell. “Green? Really? The least you could have done is make him blue like Sonic. Plus, the eyes are the wrong distance apart. Everyone but the producers know there’s an issue. We even have Jim Carrey’s support. He posted a video of himself using his ass as a puppet, saying, ‘This stinks more than I do.’”
An online petition to change the animated ogre’s design soon spread over social media.
“Shrek was just the tip of the iceberg for us Sonic fans,” said Todd Crain, creator of the petition. “We want every animation to look like Sonic. Spongebob, Toy Story, Lion King, Ponyo. Some call these iconic animations, but we call them disappointments. I’m just saying, Paddington 2 would still have a 100% on Rotten Tomatoes if they had properly designed that little bear to look like a cool, blue hedgehog.”
At press time, DreamWorks Animation President Margie Cohn gave in to fan pressure, announcing that Shrek’s will be changed to look more like Sonic and that Ben Schwartz will be replacing Mike Myers in the title role.
