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Mid-Level Boss Has Upper Level Written All Over Him

CASTLE MORNE — Local miniboss Leonine Misbegotten has many of the necessary ingredients for a promotion to full boss, several higher-ups report.

“This kid is fast, he’s aggressive, and his signature move is some pretty unfair bullshit. These can be the hallmarks of a future upper-level boss, so I’m keeping a close eye on him,” said Starscourge Radahn, a demigod gone mad with Scarlett Rot and HR manager for the Caelid region. “If he keeps closing the gap on glass cannons and punishing casuals for roll-dodging too much, he’s going to have a bright future.”

Leonine Misbegotten would likely follow a long, multi-stage promotion process, learning to make his attacks even more annoying, and overall create a more frustrating experience for his opponents.

“We’d start him in an associate position, of course,” said Radahn, mounting his stupid little horse for yet another Festival. “We’ve actually got a Misbegotten working with the Crucible Knight up there in Redmane Castle, and I hear fighting them can be a gigantic pain in the ass. So that’s good.”

While many bosses see potential for Leonine Misbegotten to succeed at the higher levels, others remain unimpressed.

“That skinny guy with the lion face? Don’t make me laugh. He might be hot stuff over there in that dinky castle, but kids like him get eaten alive in a fast-paced, high-stakes workplace like mine,” said Malenia, the feared final boss of Elphael, Brace of the Haligtree. “No, literally — we have some lion dudes up in the branches that look just like him. They’re, like, regular enemies here. They get sliced up in two seconds against kind of bleed builds we deal with every day. He should count himself lucky.”

Plans to promote Leonine Misbegotten were later canceled after the discovery of Ash of War: Barricade Shield, a skill that basically makes him a joke.

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