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Parent Reading Steam Reviews to Determine If Genital Jousting Is Appropriate for Children

CHESAPEAKE, W. Va. —  A concerned parent has reportedly spent hours scouring the Steam reviews for Devolver Digital’s Genital Jousting in an effort to determine if the game would be appropriate for her sons to play, sources have confirmed. 

“Oh, now this one here is interesting,” said Carol Morris, mother of three young gamers, reading another in a series of Steam reviews out loud to no one in particular. “It says ‘Genital Jousting provides an absurd look at the status quo and the things we value in our lives, as our hero John gets ready for his high school reunion and takes stock of where he’s at in his life. Also, John is a set of dick and balls and an asshole that works at a dildo factory shoving dildos up his asshole all day.’”

“So getting kind of mixed signals on that one,” she said.

The game, released in early 2018, is a physics based party game which also features a short story mode. The game is rated M for mature and garnered mostly positive reviews. 

“While Genital Jousting clearly won’t be for everybody, those that give it a shot will find an inspired puzzle game akin to a more sophomoric Untitled Goose Game,” read GameSpew’s positive review of the title. “The satirical looks at office culture, consumerism, and dating life pair nicely with the sight gags like when you put a match up your asshole and use it to light candles or when you hurt your asshole and put a Band-Aid on your asshole. A truly one of a kind game.” 

The game’s developers said they designed the game with a number of different audiences in mind, potentially even children. 

“I know it’s easy to laugh off a title like Genital Jousting, but we really wanted to do two things; make a fun video game, and challenge what it is that a video game could be,” said Evan Greenwood, creative director with Free Lives Ltd. “It’s not really my place to say whether it’s appropriate for a lady’s children or not. I guess it all depends on if you’re more comfortable with them playing some violent shooter, or a thoughtful little game that tells a nice story?”

“Where, yes, you steer around as a big red schlong and nads that leaves a slimy trail everywhere it goes,” he continued. “That’s in there.” 

As of press time, Morris decided to go ahead and purchase Genital Jousting for her sons, and informed them that she would sit with them while they played the game to make sure they understood all of the mature content. 

Hey! This article is sponsored by Devolver Digital. Genital Jousting may not be appropriate for children, but it is very appropriate for YOU, an ADULT. So you should check it out on Steam right now and play it, OK? It’s 75% off right now and it’s got dicks in it.

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