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Desperate Xbox User Holds Controller While Watching HBO’s ‘The Last of Us’

DAVENPORT, Iowa — Local gamer Patricia Hart allegedly held her Xbox Elite controller during the premiere of HBO’s The Last of Us, hoping to simulate the experience of playing the PlayStation-exclusive game on her console.

“Yeah, it was weird. I asked if she wanted to check out that new HBO show, but she said she needed to ‘watch it single-player’ and went to her room with her headset and controller,” said roommate Casey Bracken, who later found a YouTube video titled ‘TLOU Main Menu Music’ playing on Hart’s laptop. “I didn’t understand at the time, but that’s because I had no idea what she was going through as an Xbox owner. I totally get it now. She’s doing what she can with what she has. I think that’s beautiful, in a way.”

Hart has denied the allegations, claiming her critics made them up to smear her name.

“The rumors being spread about me are completely false. I did not hold my controller for the entire runtime of the show, nor did I move the joysticks whenever Joel moved in the show. I also did not push buttons whenever he interacted with items in the show. These are lies,” wrote Hart in a lengthy statement posted to Reddit. “I’m sure the Sony fanboys are behind it, somehow.”

Hart insisted the allegations didn’t even make sense, since she wouldn’t want to play The Last of Us anyway, if she could.

“My friend told me the first game isn’t even that great, and I mean, look at these negative reviews. I’m actually glad I can’t play it on my Xbox,” said Hart after searching ‘last of us bad’ on Google. “But I think we can all agree that, if I did want to play it, then I’d be getting pretty much the same experience by watching the show. So I’m not missing out anymore, right? Right?”

Hart was last seen holding her controller while watching the Starfield trailer on repeat.

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