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Counter-Strike 2 Player Has Déjà Vu After Using Same Slurs as Yesterday

HARLAN, Ky. — After six solid hours of doing nothing but losing at Premier, Counter-Strike 2 player Tyler “Huge Ackman” Powell, 22, has reportedly started feeling a sense of déjà vu after using the same slurs he used yesterday.

Powell explained the feeling in an interview after his 13th loss of the night.

“Usually, I run it down mid, throw all of my flashbangs, immediately die, and then I start calling all my teammates all slurs imaginable. But after this particular loss, the routine felt odd,” Powell said. “I missed a headshot due to hit reg and got sprayed with an AK by a guy who belongs in Silver. That’s when it happened: I started screaming every slur known to man and this strange feeling rushed through me like this all happened yesterday — like I had already been through this.”

Powell still struggles to explain his situation.

“It just feels like everyday I’m miserable, shouting slurs at people I don’t know, targeted at groups of people I’ve mostly never met,” Powell continued. “I don’t know if I’ve been playing for six hours or six years. It just goes on and on. My friends think it’s just the caffeine of three energy drinks coursing through my veins but it can’t be.”

Popular Counter-Strike 2 content creator and streamer gogodanz1 gave his professional opinion on the matter.

“Anyone playing the same game every day for 12 or more hours can experience the warping of the fabric of time. When you scream the same ignorant insults every day, it’s possible to surrender your soul to toxicity and degeneracy and just get truly lost,” he said. “It happened to my friend who played Valorant. He’s gone now. Lost to the void.”

At press time, Powell has not been seen leaving his parent’s basement for some time. Sources confirm his only source of nutrition is a can of Prime his father places at the top of the stairs every night.

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