BETHLEHEM, Penn. – The Turner family saw a rare phenomenon in gaming when they cleaned out the basement this past weekend and an old, broken SNES cartridge of Earthworm Jim miraculously regenerated into two games, according to reports.
“I was looking for the 12-foot skeleton we put in the front yard every Halloween and knocked down the box of all my old video games,” says Dave Turner, patriarch of the family. “Most of the games survived the fall, but Earthworm Jim took the brunt of the impact, breaking clean in two.”
The family placed the broken relic of Dave’s youth on the kitchen table and set out to decorate the house for the spooky season, but the real spook was waiting for them to return.
“It was a miracle sent from God!” yelped Dave’s wife Marcia as she clutched a rosary to her chest. “Divine Intervention repaired that Earthworm Jim game. Just as Jesus fed his 500 followers with two fish and a loaf of bread, this game will multiply in order to satiate the children of God.”
The supernatural occurrence has led skeptics and believers alike to flock to the suburban Pennsylvania home. Religious leaders and scientific experts have both weighed in with potential explanations.
“We’ve seen regenerative properties like this before in similar species like Bookworm Adventures and Worms: Armageddon.” claims Dr. Justin Hogan, New Jersey’s leading Wormologist. “However this specimen is unique, a near perfect duplication that could lead to a scientific breakthrough.”
At press time, the U.S. Government has confiscated the two games as they pose a potential infinite money glitch.
