ST. LOUIS — Local video game aficionado Derek Lumpkin took to Twitter today to take umbrage with a recent IGN game review, expressing his respect for the reviewer’s opinion before wishing him an immediate and violent death.
“I respect your opinion, and I totally get where you’re coming from,” the tweet began. “That said, I’m going to fucking gun you down if I ever see you in person after this abortion of a game review. Every game is subjective, and we don’t have to see eye to eye on what we like and dislike, but that doesn’t change the fact that this review was such an unfair, biased piece of shit that I think I have to kill you. Who the fuck do you think you are saying you don’t like something I liked? Besides your decades long career as a professional critic, what gives you the right to criticize things? Bastard.”
The IGN reviewer, Mitchel Saltzman, explained that he tries to take comments like these personally.
“Before replying and starting a fight, I always try to think about where these guys are coming from, and hope that it’s not too close to my house,” Saltzman said. “These guys are just really passionate about playing video games, designing video games, and leaking my family’s address to the dark web, and I respect that. They get that I’m just doing my job, giving my honest opinion, and I in turn respect the fact that they want to carve up my abdomen with a butterfly knife.”
At press time, Twitter users had orchestrated an intelligent, systematic rebuttal to his review in the form of a pipe bomb delivered to his downtown apartment.
