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8 Ways Elon Musk Plans to Improve Twitter

Is Twitter getting worse and worse every day? It sure feels like it, these days. But if you’re worried the site is destined to fall apart, fear not! Twitter’s CEO Elon Musk — who purchased the website for $44 billion last year and has lost half of its value since then — is working tirelessly to keep it alive. Here are 8 ways that Elon Musk plans to improve Twitter.

#8 — No water allowed on Twitter premises

#7 — Everyone has to give him $30

#6 — Tweeting “Twitter is thriving” twice a week

#5 — Writing “Twitter = Money” on the Company Whiteboard

#4 — Going bankrupt

#3 — Collaborating with foreign royalty

#2 — Firing everyone at once

#1 — Free hugs for all advertisers