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Henry Kissinger Loses 100-Year Kill Streak

Henry Kissinger, who was on an nearly unrivaled and murderous 100-year kill streak, has finally died, according to a report over voice chat.

“I almost had the nuke,” Kissinger said from hell. “I def dropped a lot of bombs and I guess I should be thankful for that, but I wanted the nuke bad.”

Hard Drive will continue to update this developing story, which we gave away prematurely – much like the Nobel Committee when they awarded Kissinger a peace prize for ending the Vietnam war before it was over.

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