Press "Enter" to skip to content

Biden’s Approval Rating Tanks After Leaked Audio of Him Ranking Windwaker C-Tier

WASHINGTON — Recent polls have indicated the approval rating of President Biden has dropped dramatically in the past week after audio leaked online of the President ranking The Legend of Zelda: Windwaker as C-Tier. 

“I’m not a very political person, but even I have my limits. The fact that our President can’t even appreciate one of the most iconic games of the Zelda series is proof he is not fit to be a leader,” said former Biden supporter Elaina Marlowe. “The American people deserve a Commander-in-Chief that will at least rank Windwaker in A [Tier], if not S. The only thing stopping me from calling for his impeachment is that he rightfully put Majora’s Mask at the top.”

Former president Donald Trump, who was heard in the audio collaborating with Biden on the Tier List, criticized the Democrat for his controversial ranking. 

“Stalfos Joe is a crook and a cheater, I’ve always said this. But the fact that he said that Windwaker’s music is ‘mediocre’ is just unAmerican. It really is,” Trump said at a rally in Florida today. “I’ve said some regrettable things on tape before, but I’ve never come close to anything so heinous as saying the greatest GameCube game of all time ‘boring.’ Stalfos Joe — I say that because he looks like a stalfos — he’s a skeleton man! Stalfos Joe, he has no chance, absolutely no chance at winning the election next year with such a pathetic understanding of good game design. He’s just bones and a sword!”

Biden addressed the audio at a Presidential Press Conference on Monday. 

“I apologize to anyone who was hurt by my comments, but I must stand by them as fact, Windwaker is mid at best, alright?” Biden said. “Those of you who decry my claim as ‘cringe’ or ‘skill-issue’ are merely trying to cope with the fact you didn’t grow up with Ocarina of Time. Although I know our country is now more divided than ever, I hope we can come together as a Nation and agree that Link to the Past is underrated.”

At press time, various presidential hopefuls were gearing up for upcoming debates by practicing their arguments as to whether or not weapon degradation in Breath of the Wild is good or bad.

Hello adventurer! Please collect five USD skins a month and head to our Patreon.
Become a patron at Patreon!