The new overnight meal kit from FreshApron promises to deliver a variety of mouthwatering meals that can be easily prepared by anyone who finds the box before you get home, according to sources.
“FreshApron was designed to save time and money for whoever can snatch it from your front door the fastest,” explains company CEO Jan Merriwether. “And the best part is, these packages weigh almost nothing, so you could carry it back to your kitchen no matter how far away you live.”
Charlotte-resident Hugh Jinks recently decided to give the new meal kit a try, and the outcome was nothing short of spectacular. “The f**king package disappeared as if by magic,” claimed Jinks. “I couldn’t believe it! It was almost like watching David Blaine.”
While some meal kits take forever to arrive, FreshApron has been praised for their quick, efficient delivery notifications. Customers receive an instant text message when your package is dropped off, and a second text message once someone has stolen it.
“While many meal kits get lost in transit, FreshApron promises your meal kit will only get lost after delivery,” Merriwether stated.
Of course, not everyone has had a positive experience. Joe Nermeth, 34, is one such individual.
“I found a FreshApron box on my neighbors porch and it turned out to be full of rotten fish! I tried complaining to my neighbors about it and they told me ‘we canceled that subscription months ago,’” complained Nermeth. “If these things are going to contain perishables they should put a date on the box!”
Until they fix the problem, Nermeth says he’s going to go back to robbing his local Target.
