80. Super Star Wars
The Star Wars movies always get me real seasick for some reason, so I was glad I cold finally check these things out. Love that Chewie!
79. Wall Street Kid
Whenever I had to vote on some economy thing I would usually play this before bed and hoped it all made sense when I woke up. Great little game.
78. Bigfoot
Look at the size of that bad boy. What else do I need to say?
77. Blades of Steel
An underrated game in the sense that you get to pummel people from a lot of different countries without proper provocation.
76. Battlefield 2
I was playing this when Hurricane Katrina happened. I’m really sorry about that, everybody. One of the all time greats!
75. Bad Dudes
I won’t say my presidency was BORING, but I don’t know, I thought it would be different. I thought ninjas would try to come take me. This game is funner than heck, but also paints an irresponsible picture of America’s criminal underworld.
74. Pokémon Red
Never blue, always red. Due to the superstitious nature of my fierce conservatism, I’ve never known the pleasure of catching and training a Magmar 🙁
73. The Adventures of Batman & Robin
A sort of forgotten game among both Batman games and classic beat ‘em ups. This is a spot-on adaptation of the incredible cartoon. Also, I am a war criminal.
72. Mortal Kombat II
This game had it all: fatalities, blood, combos, a respectable amount of cleavage, and that Baraka fella makes me laugh.
71. Plants Vs. Zombies
I used to tell Laura I was going to study some documents and then she’d find me on the crapper playing this game. I’d say “What, Laura, can’t I play a game while I’m taking a shit?” But I was almost never taking a shit.
70. Wayne Gretzky’s 3D Hockey
Hockey is one of America’s greatest exports, and I always liked this crazy ass version the best for some reason.
69. The Terminator 2
Did you know they made a movie out of this game?? I just found that out the other day.
68. Paperboy
This game reminds me of when I was a little kid growing up in Texas. I used to chuck shit at the paperboy.
67. Bioshock
I don’t understand half of the shit that’s going on in the game, but god damn, an underwater city. Looks pretty cool.
66. Super Mario Bros. 2
I pronounce it “may-re-oh.” It’s the only way.
65. Marble Madness
I got really into Marble Madness in 2005 after scoring a copy of the NES version on eBay. I kept trying to make my own levels, but it was never as fun as the game. I hear Biden’s still finding marbles in The White House to this day heh heh heh
64. Minit
This is the first game I ever put 100 hours into. Feels good, man.
63. Wheel of Fortune
You will not beat me in this game. I repeat, you will not beat me in Wheel of Fortune. I don’t give a fuck who you are.
62. Cavemen Games
These Cavemen make me laugh and also I firmly believe that they used to have funny Olympic games where they threw each other around. Aw hell, I’m giggling just typing this.
61. Revolution X
For years I told people I’d met Aerosmith, and then one day I realized I was just thinking about when I played this game at Showbiz Pizza that one time. You can shoot CD’s!
